Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Broke up with my friend, is it haram?

Two Muslim womenSalam. I have question. I just broke up with my friend. I am feared that if I did something wrong and against Islam.

Why I broke up, well we were not very good friends anyway as there wasn't much trust between us. And also she insulted me few times and then said sorry. Sometimes she even doesn't realise that she is being rude.

Another thing I didn't like is that I don't have kids, and every time If I says something to her kids like if they being too naughty she always says because I don't have kids so I don't know how kids behave. She just say politely. It always hurts me that I love and care about her kids but she can't take a little things like if I tell her kids u need to behave or something like that.

This time I didn't like something her kid said and I just told him off and she said I am over reacting. Maybe I was, I am not sure. She kind off shouted and said don't call me again. Then I became rude as well. We blocked each others numbers and was rude with each other.

To be very honest I don't want her in my life. I am happy without her but I am scared as well that if I am doing something against Islam. Please advice.

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2 Responses »

  1. Asalamualaykum Dear Sister,

    You may have heard the saying that "people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime." Not everyone we meet is going to accompany us on our journey back to Allah. Allah knows best the reasons for that.

    It is actually very common to lose friends who are not in the same "place" in life that we are. For example, your friend has children and you don't. This doesn't mean she doesn't care about you, but she may find it hard to relate to you now that she's had kids. This happens all the time.

    It could be that while you two are not seeing eye to eye right now, you may come back into each others lives once her kids start going to school, college, or are grown. Then she will have more free time away from the kids and more time to dream, long of days past, and reconnect.

    You are not doing anything haram by not being friends anymore, if that's the route you'd like to take. Of course we are encouraged to uphold ties of kinship and sometimes that can include very close friends, but if there are frequent breaks in communication and misunderstandings between you two, it may be best to at least take a break until emotions cool down. Try not to be rude or say rude things, because only you will regret that later on, and be accountable for it.

    If after the break, you are certain you don't want her in your life, that's your choice to make.



  2. People come and go. Friends especially. You mentioned she had insulted you couple of times. She insulted you saying that you don’t have kids (suggesting, you don’t know how kids behave). You are not meant to be friends I suppose. You both have different place in life. She maybe not a nice person and doesn’t see that her kids aren’t being nice and behaving well. I don’t know.

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