Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Should a son always be near his elderly parents, or are there exceptions?


My cousin has been married for 9 years and through that period has been living near his family in another (but relatively near country) with his wife, which is close to his brother, sister, mother and father. His wife's family (two brothers and mother) are living in her origin country. All parents are getting older (late 60s) and as a result, have growing health concerns.

She wishes to move back to the origin country with him, to be nearer her mother (who lives around 1 and a half hours away from her nearest son) due to her relative isolation.

He wants to stay where they are as a responsibility to his parents and states that it is the son's Islamic responsibility to be near the parents, not the daughter's, therefore, he will be doing something wrong by moving. She believes that since his parents already have a son and daughter close by that he has some flexibility to move as a result - since they have been near them for almost a decade.

This issue is coming to an impasse leading to divorce if it cannot be resolved, and they will go their separate ways. During Covid, the travel between places is a bit more difficult, however when it is not a concern then it is very easy, though she is not satisfied with regular visits, which he has suggested.

What should they be suggested to do? Islamically would it be okay to move? Should she stay and put her (and her mother's) needs second and just follow her husband?


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1 Responses »

  1. As-salamu alaykum. My personal opinion is that the wife's place is with her husband, wherever he happens to be. If he has to travel for work, if he wants to live near his parents, or whatever the case may be, she should be with him.

    Of course there could be exceptions. But if I understand your post correctly, the wife also has two brothers. Why are they not enough to take care of her parents? Why does she have to be there?

    Wael Editor

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