Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Marrying a girl from a different caste?

Ants have castes (show here are a male, queen and worker). Human beings should not have castes!
Ants have castes (show here are a male, queen and worker). Human beings should not have castes!


My name is Javed Abbas
My mother's name is Amna

The girl I want to marry is named Lubna
Her mother's name is Sughra

Dear sir I want to get married with the said girl, but my mother & all of my family members are against this marriage because we are from different castes. The only reason for the disagreement is the caste problem, there is no other reason.

I don't want to break her heart, in this situation please help me, what I do.

Reply me urgent please.


- Javed

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6 Responses »

  1. if you truly love her than marry her in islam caste doesnt matter, if your family rejects her due to her caste then your family aint muslim

  2. As-salamu alaykum. I have to comment on "control"'s comment. It's true that there is no such thing as caste in Islam. However, it is not correct to say that if his parents believes in it, they are not Muslim. Their beliefs and behavior may not be correct, but they are still Muslim. And they are still deserving of respect, even when they are wrong.

  3. Asalaamualaikum...

    Firstly...fao: 'Control'....that was quite an immature reply to give huh?? You made a very bold but illiterate statement there declaring Javed's family 'kaafir'.

    Secondly...fao: Javed...Salaams Bother...unfortunately belief in caste systems still exists, but you can't ignore your family's opinion altogether. Why do we get involved in such situations when we know that our families hold such strong views. Surely you knew it was going to cause problems before you got involved...

    Anyway, now that you are in this situation, I would advise...If you can truly justify to yourself and your family that marrying this girl would be good for your family, your deen and your hereafter, then try to convice your parents, but do it gently. They obviously have some deeply embedded beliefs in the caste system, maybe you could try giving some examples from the Quran and also from the Sunnah of our beloved Rasool Muhammed (saw)as he married 11 times, not all of these women were from his tribe.

    Also keep in mind that its important for both families to gel aswell...we can be different but the important thing is that we respect and learn from each others differences. Only you can judge whether the families will be able to rise above their differences and live peacefully together...

    Be gentle with your parents, it may take time...but go into this with the understanding that it could go either way and explain this to Lubna ALLAH is The Greatest of Planners.

    ps: you may not feel this at the moment, but we need the support and blessings of our parents if we want to have a successful marriage...

  4. Salam brother,
    I think if your parents strongly disagree and wont come down then it is useless to marry that girl because after marriage neither your parents nor that girl can remain happy.So whats the use of a marriage that will break her heart everyday.Tell her your problem.These cast things are very difficult to eradicate from our people.It can create great problems.
    May Allah guide you to the right path and He knows best.

  5. Hello from Russia!
    Can I quote a post in your blog with the link to you?

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