Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I want to marry her but she won’t answer me

Their is a girl who I love so much. I don't want her to be my girl friend. I want her to be my wife. She never answer me.

What can I do to get her love??

~Mohamed Shaantey

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3 Responses »

  1. Assalam O Alaikum!

    First of all, love before marriage is not allowed in Islam. A true love just starts after marriage and it continues to increase with the passage of time. Before marriage its just attraction. You should seriously consider before making any decision. May be you are physically attracted towards her, which is not sufficient condition for marriage. For marriage, you should consider other factors too, which makes your compatibility with her.

    But if you are serious and feeling that she is your perfect match for future wife then you should directly say to her. Although I am not experienced but I can roughly tell you that how you can ask her about her opinion...

    "I am feeling that you are my perfect choice for marriage partner. Do you think that I am suitable for you?"

    And you should be aware that everyone is free to make a decision, you cannot force anyone to follow your decision. You can just try your best with a good hope. May Allah help you and provide you with the one which is best for you.


  2. Assalamualaikum brother Muhammad Shantey,

    It is not ideal that you ask her directly if she agrees to be your wife. What Islam teaches us is that you talk to the girl's Wali in order to take it forward.

    Allah's Messenger Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam said:

    "A man marries a woman for four reasons: for her property, for her rank, for her beauty, and for her religion (and character). So marry the one who is best in the religion and character and prosper". (Muslim)

    So make yourself clear why you want to marry her. Do Istikhaatah and talk to her Wali, in sha Allah it will work if it is good for you.

    Muhammad Waseem Edtor

  3. Assalam'alaykum,

    Its wrong to ask her directly, you might make a bad impression of yourself and probably make her go away. Best is to get your family make an official proposal to her family asking to marry her. Make sure her religion and character is satisfactory. And pray salat al istikhara. Whatever the decision maybe, put trust in Allah and move on. Having girlfriend is haram indeed. Ask Allah for help.
    Finally, you can't get her to love you. Love grows only after marriage.

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