Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My problem with my wife and her parents.

Assalam-0-Allaikum,

Hoping you find this post in best of your health.

I have question regarding my family matters, and I am in confusion to sort out the best possible solution.

1 year has been passed of my marriage and God blessed me with His blessings and I have little cute baby girl a while back.

Question 1: I heard that after giving birth to a child, wife should have to stay at her mother's home for about 40 to 45 days. What does Islam teach us in this regard.

Question 2: Regarding to above question, btw our families there wasn't any agreement or any notification from my wifes parents that it would be done like that on birth occasion, but now they are forcing me to do that like to complete 45 days at her home.

When I was about to take my wife from her home after 10 to 15 days passed. Not only this, her father put a demand infront of me that they will not sent my wife and my child back to me unless or until I buy a seperate home for her(which I cannot afford in my salary) where she can live freely and she wont have any kind of restriction of going in or out, means with out my(husbands) permission.

Adding to this, If I cant support seperation for her, then why did I married with her and when I will be able to support a seperate home, then I will be allowed to take my wife and my child back until then both will be in their's custody.

Adding to this, I am the elder son and I am supporting my family, and my parents needs me and definitly I want to serve them.

How should I act? What are the rights of her parents on her, are they doing right or wrong? Now what kind of rights I have and what I can show them. As her father said, that as your wife is my daughther so he has full rights on her to not to permitt her to go with me?


Tagged as: , , , , , ,

28 Responses »

  1. alikoum salam,

    u mention her family's restrictions. But you are her husband, why dont she just come back to you, do they always decide for her even married? thats the main prob, even if you could afford whatever her parents want for her., will she always listen to her parents and let them interefere in your marriage?

    i think u should try to contact your wife and discuss with her. If she disagrees with her parents, she should tell them she wants to be with husband whatever the situation. Plus its haram what they are doing.

  2. Salaam Brother in Islam,

    May God bless and grant you, your wife, your families and your new addition to the family, mashaAllah.

    Mam Abu Dawood, al-Tirmizi and others narrated some Hadith that Ummu Salamah said: "The woman having bleeding after delivery would sit for forty days". This Hadith means that they refrain from praying, fasting and having sex in that period. It can also be interpreted to mean that the new mother doesn't leave the house, although I have found no evidence to show that staying in the home is any part of any official ruling on this. The hadith does state that she sat for 40 days - so it could be fairly interpreted in the way your parent's in Law have interpreted it.

    I would say that I have assisted many sisters during their first weeks of motherhood and they are generally weak, tired, emotional and in need of support. Usually, its Mum that comes to the rescue when a new baby graces our lives so if your wife would like to stay near to her mother during this time, it is understandable.

    The wife has the right to live in separate accommodation with her husband and children, if she does not like to share it with anyone like her in-laws or relatives. This is the view of most of the Hanafi, Shafi`i and Hanbali faqīh. She also has the right to refuse to live with her husband's father, mother and siblings.

    Her father has a right to worry about her life and her future and be concerned for her, just as our Prophet (pbuh) has concerns over his daughter Fatimah and Ali's marriage (pbut) to the extent where he pulled Ali to one side and had a few words with him when she ran to him upset, telling him what hurts his daughter, hurts him.

    I can understand your frustrations, and your feelings regarding taking care of your parents, MashaAllah it is great that you want to do that. Marrying, and moving out of the parental home does not affect the love and care we show and feel toward our parents. You can still be a loving and adoring son under a different roof. It is not a condition of kindness and devotion that we share a roof with those we love and are devoted to. Love kindness and devotion can be shown from anywhere that we are.

    I I have explained to the best of my knowledge I pray that it is helpful to you, if anyone knows different please feel free to respond.

    Peace
    L

    • Thanks for the reply, I appreciate your comments.

      1) I didn't ask about 40 days of bleeding issue. I asked, Is shariyat allowed wife or her parents to take their daughter in their's house without husbands permission and hold her for 40 days. I have no issue how much time she like to live.

      2) I have been rather looking at separate house that I cant afford at this time, just because I am supporting my family financially, under which I cannot support two house separately, So rather to stay totally separate from my rental house, I put a suggestion in front of my wife and her family that I had listen them as my parents, and she has full rights to show her concerns with me if she had some problem in my house, but she didn't. On discussion, one thing that his father said that she should have no restriction from my side to go anywhere in and out of the house. She should have to go in and out freely with my (her husband) interference means without taking any kind of permission. I suggested that if she want to be a separator then bear it for 1 to 2 years till then I be able to support a separate house financially. During this period she is fully authorized to do anything under the restriction of Islam and under her limitations and I will totally bring food separately for her if she like to cooked separately even. My concern is financial issues sister, on which you didn't replied. On this suggestion, they replied if you can't afford a separate house then do it as when you able to do, till then her father will not send my wife and daughter to my house. A kind of push they are forcing me to act which I cannot do it right now.

      My wife is doing job as well, whenever I asked to share load with me then she denies to do that. So now tell what could be the best possible solution for me. Either to let her live in her parents house however the time may be. or what ?

    • Mashallah well said...infact 100% true based on Islamic Litrature...
      Allah Bless you.....

  3. Salaam brother,

    I believe that the husband's rights are more than the parents rights in regard to a married woman, but only as long as he is providing her with her rights as a wife. So you have more rights as her husband, but those rights are dependent on your performance as a Muslim husband, and not exclusive no-matter-what rights.

    Regarding number 2, legally, the wife should not do anything without her husband's permission according to Sharia law. Most couples know the limits and don't transgress them and there should be trust between husband and wife. I don't know any married couples in which the wife asks her husband "can I visit my sister?"...it is accepted between them that of course she can visit her sister / family / cousin / friend / supermarket / work etc.

    Your family-in-law seem to feel very strongly that your word is not good enough,that force and pressure is the way forward for your situation. Can you tell me why they feel this way?

    Regarding finance, I am sure most parent's would pull their daughter out of a relationship in which she was not being looked after and provided for properly. If you cannot support two families, then you must choose which family you are going to support and then slowly shift your finances into the direction of the family you want to support. I know that you want to support your family: but at what cost? You may have to cut back on one to support the other, or ask a brother to help you or something along those lines - because your wife and child will only need more and more as your child grows.

    Peace,
    L

  4. brother her family is being unreasonable, what did your wife say? brother you rather divorce her you can tell they playin mind games.

    ma salama

  5. ok one thing is there is no such thing in islam that asks your wife to go to her parents for fourty days after birth. the next thing is, islamically, for a girl, obidience comes first to allah, then husband, then parents if what parents say does NOT disagree with what husband says. so you my brother have more right over her than her parents. are u paki? her family seems to have no respect for you, for decent families even if not religious, will not treat sons in law this way. i don't know the background. have you and your wife ever fought about living with your parents? was it a love marriage? u r more religous than the girl? is she afraid of her controlling parents? you need to speak to your wife privately, and ask her how she honestly feels without anyone else's opinion. if she wants to go back with you, leave queitly with her and the baby. sneak out and go back to your home. let her inform her family by phone that they were sleeping and she wanted to go back home. now if they are bad, they will yell, fight, scream, curse. i don't know idf they are trying to seperate you two. just move far far away from them. i know easier said than done. the other thing i wanted to mention is in paki culture the sons are raised to provide for the parents, brainwashing is done the boys whole life. yes your parents have a right on you, but your wife has a right on you, your children have a right on you. many paki guys have enough to get a seperate house for their wives but say trhey can't afford it because extra money is going to wedding expenses of relatives, educational expenses of relatives, luxury expenese of relatives like cars, houses, house renovations. from a wife's point pof view, is it fair when a husband can not buy her a house but is making a house for another relative. stop lying to her and yourself.

  6. Dear All, Assalam-0-Alliakum,

    Many thanks for your guidance and feedbacks, May God bless you all.

    About this statement: "Can I visit my sister?"

    From the day 1, I didn't stopped my wife to go to her mother's house. I even left her to her parents house for 2 to 3 days after every 2nd weekend. But her parents call me one day, and forcing me to leave her for atleast 1 week whenever she came here and they fought with me at there's own house. There's is only 1 time happened so far, that she days at my house for 3 weeks in regular routine, other wise she use to quarrel with me. I even heard on phone that whenever her parents call her, she bagan to crying and most of time she quarreled like a hell that I am doing nothing for her this and that. Even whenever I asked for preparation of dinner or lunch or breakfast, she occasionally served me. I even say 10 or 20 dishes she totally cooked for me during my 10 months relationship otherwise all is my mother who is bearing me still even I am married. and her parents forcing me to stay seperate that she would have no hurdle to go any where in an out.

    Her parents especially father says me 3 to 4 times that you have no right on her except marital relationship, and I cannot force her to work for you and act for you or anykind. If I am saying her, okay move to go back to home then don't force her to do like that. She is not willing to go with you. Go and came in when you can handle separate home for her.

    About this statement:
    Your family-in-law seem to feel very strongly that your word is not good enough,that force and pressure is the way forward for your situation. Can you tell me why they feel this way?

    Sister, these are reasons they want that's why they are trying to create hurdles in my life.

    No permission to take for in and out. no hurdle.
    Spent on her gracefully. Give her finance record to her, whatever I earned, and how much I spent here and there and over my family.
    I cant force to do this and that.
    Means she is suppose to act anything freely. My wife wants control in the house.
    What ever my family in law says me to act like for her , I must follow her.

    What do you respond, and how could I convince her, as her driving force is her parents. They are at her back caused of such happenings. Her family status is a little good than us, I accept. But status what means in Islam? Does it says, husband has to act like a servant in front of her wife. Husband has to bear all kind of childish and bullish things. I dont know why people dont understand other sides of feelings. How much other can be in Pain, Is her husband can bear such things or not?

    Even my car has been stolen from outside of there's house. When I went to her parent's house taking her on urgent call. They didn't support me at that time. They only support her daughter and even on 3rd day of my car stolen, they came in to my house for fight that why I cannot take her to doctor which is very far from my house and I was convincing her that I dont have car now, my mother will take you to nearest doctor somewhere, when I was at some distance.

    Such kind of happenings I had faced. Her parents bullishly handled all this situation. Even after 6 months has gone, they didn't asked from me, what is the progress on your car search.

    How would you all guys like to respond?

    Last commented person. anonymous
    June 25, 2010 • 8:59 am

    I am Paki and muslim Allhamadulliah. And I am still trying to convince my wife my showing respect to her an handling her in a very respective manner that what ever she is asking for separation is right but I cannot do it for 2 to 3 years at least, I have family issues at this time and financially as well. But she and her parents has no softness.

    have you and your wife ever fought about living with your parents? Yes once it happened.
    Was it a love marriage? Arranged
    u r more religous than the girl? Can say that, Whenever I talked with her on Islam she said, we dont have to listen all the time Islam.
    is she afraid of her controlling parents? Yes, she use to cry whenever she delay to pick there phone call or don't call them in a day or two. They anger on her and in response she quarrel with me many times.

    I belong to a middle class family, Even I don't have our own house we are living in a rental house and we have a very decent culture environment which Islam accepts.

  7. it's me again brother. i am not a social worker or psychologist, i never even finished my bachelors degree in these feilds but i am here only to help you with what little knowledge that i do have. you don't mention your parents. are there elders from your side who can talk to her parents? these people seem to have no regard for you. now what i am trying to figure out is your wife. let me share two true scenarios with you
    scenario A: a girl and boy have love marriage. her parents were already abusive and controlling to the girl before marriage and also show no respect for the boy. they did agree to marry their daughter because they were afraid if they said no, she might humiliate them by runing away. but they spared no chance of creating enimity between boy and girl. they lied about the girl to the boy, the girl was already scared of her manipulative mother. but the girl had true love for the boy so all of the games that were meant to create hate in her heart for the boy did NOT work. she had taqwa and knew that her husband's happiness is more important than anything else. she knew that obedience to husband comes before obedience to parents because of her taqwa for allah. otherwise she would have put parents first just out of fear despite her love for the boy. this girl was true and honest with the boy, and did not do any backbitting or anything else behind his back. she loved him and knew if he was happy, then allah was happy. also her love for him made her sacrifice her dreams of having a certain type of home after marriage. the first few years of marriage, they were poor, and lived in poverty compared to the lifestyle the girl was used to. she didn't mind. she loved him. but when his parents and other family came into the picture after four/five years, this same girl was different. she yelled and screamed at her husband, out of her character. before, she hated talking this way, but his family was playing games and he was falling for them. eventually, she learned and accepted the negative aspects, but realized his positive qualities. she also learned that she can love him only when he is not near his family. when his family is around, she has nobody. the games they play, the things they say, and it seems he is naive enough to go on their side. it has also helped that she is now much a stronger woman, not that scared timid girl who could easily be manipulated by her screaming mother. she knows her mother has a psychological problem, and expects screaming and yelling from her. it has also helped that they have moved far far away from her parents. things are much more peaceful.
    scenario B a boy and girl are in an arranged marriage. the boy is mashallah religious. the girl is not. the boy is from a vilage. the girl's family had moved to city from village years before. the boys family is, as desi family's are, sometimes verbally abusive to the girl and manipulative. but she is the same way, and disrespectful. she is ashamed of her husband's low salary. the boy wants a divorce. the girl had even said something. the girl's family start threatening to kill the boy if he divorces their daughter. the girl is not honest with her husband. she tells people she is ashamed of him. she lies about the things going on. she even says she dislikes him, but loves to show off the sacrifices she made. she makes him look like the bad guy, and his family too. they are at fault. but she is shrewd too. so rude she is, that you can she the discomfort that her mother in law has being around her. she yells at her husband, she screams at him, since begining. she disrespects him because she thinks she is "modern" and beautiful. she is rude to others in his family. rudeness disapears when it is to her advantage.
    which one sounds like your wife? i sense that her and your levels of taqwa are different right now. this can be a problem. you do what allah wants you to do, she seems to be doing what her parents want her to be doing. she could be very well afraid of them. sorry i will finish later, my baby is upset

  8. i did finish, but i guess there was some mistake as it didn't get posted. i don't remember what i advised. but i will tell you all i can say is if you have reasonable people or freinds who you can seek help from. you and your wife need to read on emotional blackmail and emotional abuse, personality disorders, and books for people who were mistreated/abused by their parents. i can give you authors, book titles, and websites, but i feel not to waste my time writing all these info as it is probably going to be deleted. it seems when i post helpful links to people, someone delets them. your wife is a grown woman now and needs to understand what her parents are and to not be fearful of them. for people who want to control others do it through fear. you have to go to her parents house and speak privately with her. ask her how she honestly feels about you, having another house, her parents, and things. ask her about her concerns and her heart. make no threats. just talk to her peacefully, queitly, calmly, and honestly. if she wants to go back with you but is only afraid of parents, just take her back without telling them. leave in early morning while they are asleep. i am afraid of making this suggestion because i don't know how far your in-laws can go to physically harm you or the girl. or you can suggest a vacation far away to celebrate you baby's first month and after vacation bring her to your house. but she has to learn to be firm with people so she is not misused. other thing ias, talk to some shaik you know or some freinds you have that know your wife as well can go visit her in her parents house and help you bring her back. why are they threatening so much for a seperate place. did you two have problems living with your parents? i will tell you one thing, if your wife loves you, then the best thing is for both of you to move far far away from such people. they have already started manipulating you, this will continue forever. i don't know your parents either, but as far as i know it is best to have your own place.

  9. Thanks Anonymous for your time you served and shared your knowledge with me.

    Both scene A & B, are far away from my situation. Few things are certainly matched but not the basics, yet theme on both sides are the same.

    I am trying to figure out a way to solve this issue, and hopefully with the help of God. Things are gonna happening in right directions, just perspective views tells you a lot what should be the next move. This has to be resolved with great patience and care. And patience is the only solution to get all wrong things on right path. This is the story of every house now a day. Leg pulling, Mind pulling bla bla bla... I want that you all should learn alot from such kind of happenings.

    There is an hidden strength inside of you, which one can able to understand how to use that, one can conquer anything in this real world. Find your abilities what you can do best for others. Such attitude makes you big enough that you gonna served like budha.

    Keep your knowledge updated, this has no boundaries.

    Thanks all of you, May God bless you all, as you served and put suggestions.

  10. Brother, as u described it, it seems like ur not a bad husband. Usually women's do go to their parents house during the pregnancy, I did hear of this before. But once they married their daughter off, she is ur responsibility, and they can't tell u guys wat to do. I have no idea y they putting u down. And plus y isn't she helping u financially if she was wrkin too, not sayin she should but still. R u sure she is not the one tat wants to move out? If the parents don't want to let her go just because u r not living separately, tell them keep ur daughter then. Not sayin divorce her. Tell them whenever u guys are ready to let her come bak, she can for my doors r always open. If not, its their lost not urs. I don't get y they walking on u like this. Is she like a princess or really well off?! Maybe Tats y they treatin u like tis. Just tell them, if u guys don't let her come with me, u guys keep her then. Good luck brother. Hope it wrks out for u.

  11. This is just as a reference,

    Hadhrat ibn Abbas said, ‘At the time of the Prophet , there was a young man named Alkamah. He used to work very hard and give his earnings to charity. One day he became very ill. His wife sent a message to the Prophet . The Prophet sent Bilal , Ali , Suleman and Amar with these words, ‘See how he is.’ They went and found that he was indeed very ill and close to death. They spent some time trying to make him read the Kalimah, but something was holding him back. Hazrat Bilal returned to tell the Prophet about his condition. The Prophet asked, ‘Are his parents alive?’ Bilal replied, ‘His father has passed away, but his mother is still alive.’ The Prophet told Bilal to call his mother and if she couldn't come then the Prophet would come to her. As soon as Alkamah’s mother heard, she grabbed her walking stick and came right away. She did Salaam and the Prophet returned it and asked, ‘Tell me truthfully, if you don't, then I will learn by revelation. What sort of deeds did your son do?’ She told the Prophet that he was a very pious man, that he used to read prayers consistently, fast constantly and give alms abundantly. The Prophet asked her how he was with her. She said, ‘I am upset with him. Instead of me, he gives preference to his wife. He used to disobey me and listened to his wife. The Prophet said to her, ‘Your displeasure has stopped Alkamah from reciting the Kalimah.’ The Prophet then ordered his Companions to gather some wood and to burn him. The mother asked whether they were really going to burn her son in front of her? The Prophet told her, ‘Allah's punishment is much greater. If you want Allah to forgive Alkamah, you must first forgive him yourself. His praying, fasting and alms-giving will do him no good.’ His mother raised her hands and said, ‘I have forgiven him.’ The Prophet sent Bilal to check on Alkamahh. He was reading the Kalimah. Alkamahh died that very day. The Prophet arranged his funeral and led his Janazah. After that he stood up and addressed the people. ‘The person who prefers his wife rather then his mother, Allah’s curse be upon him. His faraaidh and nawafil will not be accepted.’

  12. salaam,,
    well am a 11months old bride and i have a problem with my mum in law.. she is very irritating, she is jealous (which is something natural) she is a person with whom u cannot live!! n my husband also knows it, HE ADMITS IT, he can afford another house BUT he doesn't want to live in a separate house because my dad in law is MASHALLAH - a very nice man- n my hubby respects him and me either. though i cannot live with his mother but i respect my husband's feeling towards his dad and i'm willing to live with his family. but am praying to Allah to help me in a way that either make me happy n satisfied and comfortable with my mum in law or else make my hubby only to move me in a separate house. brother one should not lose hope in Allah.

    IN YOUR CASE ill say that your in laws seem not good with you,, there is one thing you can do is that instead of asking people ask Allah only by doing ISTIKHARA!!
    http://www.islamicacademy.org/html/Dua/How_to_do_Istakhara.htm
    go to this link,, do istikhara.. i hope Allah (SWT) will show you the path,, if she is not good for you he will make you strong and make you give divorce to her.. and if she is good he will show you the path.. he will guide you towards whatever is good for you just LEAVE IT ON ALLAH!! he knows better!!
    and if this works for you then please remember me in your prayers cause i am also suffering ALOT.
    may Allah protect us all from satan and every bad deeds ameen
    may Allah shows you the correct path and make things easier for you!!

    • Thank you for your suggestion. I did istikhara many times before making my final decision and It works well now. I have divorced her.

      In your case, just try to please your husband. Be nice with him in any case. Hopefully Allah will resolve your issues.

  13. Brother & sister i also have sort of same situation,would like to share with you.i have been married 26months and Alhamdolilah Allah blessed me a very cute baby girl(15months).My wife is working & career oriented women.I am working aboard and she used to live with her mother house.she is not comfortable with my family and my home.she belongs to modern HiFi well off family.My little home not enough for her. She dont pay much attention over family issue rather her career.She spend her earning over her sibling.I am supporting her to complete her career dream and in return got nothing.she used to live with her mother since then her attitude changed so much that she is not paying attention when become sick,she wants to know how & where i spening my earnings and she never revealed about hers..She have all she wants,a career, cute little doll.I am nowhere.i think now she transformed into motherhood thats Y she forget husband.
    she is no more wife now.
    I belong to more religious family than hers and i fear that my darling daughter would not have knowledge & islamic envirnment as she lives with her mom's family.

  14. My brother is married for 3years.His mother-in-law is interfering in their life from the day 1 by calling or sending messagemy brother's wife almost every single hour asking what is she doing.has she ate or not....took shower or not which my brother didn't like it.She used to stay at mother's house 3-4 days a week.if for any reason she couldn't to go then she used to get moody...sometimes if asked a simple question she would asnwered him back in a rude way.about a year back my brother and his wife had argument on the same topic and she left the house and went to her mother's house.she also said that she doesn't want to stay with my brother anymore and she doesn't even keep any contact with him aor our family but my brother loves her very much and he still thinking she would come back one day.

    my brother went to a local imam for a solution and the imam told him that his mother-in-laws has done black magic to break the marital relation and so that she would start staying with her mother again.Its' been a year still no news of my brothers wife.

    In this case what should we do eto solve the problem as my brother is blindly in love with his wife and does want to leave...whereas she doesn't want to stay with him?

  15. at above...i wrote a post few days bak.but it doesnt get published??it says its pending.....

    • Aina,

      Thank you for submitting your post. However it will be about a month before it will be published as we have a queue of people waiting to have their questions answered.

      SisterZ
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  16. AOA Brother,

    It’s true nobody could feel your pain exactly what you are feeling. But what I think you have to be bit hard in your decisions. Although she has right to demand for a separate house I agree, then why her parent didn’t support you regarding this, if you have financial resources? What I got through all this discussion is that they just want to tease you and sorry to say your wife is availing every single opportunity to tease you and my poor brother is being teased by them all the time. Mashallah all the way starting from your marriage life you remain calm listen to them (Including your wife) nicely, but i think it’s time to break the ice. If you bow this time you to bow them for the rest of your life and you wife will continue to shed crocodile tear and horse playing with you. I can feel your pain how you feel being a father of baby girl but stupidity is that your wife has no sense. She don’t know what are the rights of husband, and what she has to do being as a wife. That’s why quantity of women in Jahannum will be greater than men. I really feel sorry for you. But brother don’t be too much lenient.
    I am not talking on the basis of emotions; I have read all the comments till the end.
    What i suggest, just call your wife and try to convince her once. As you said you have done already its mean she will not be convinced. So just call her to tell her how much you are suffering from mental and physical disturbance, I want you to come back home.
    If she would be wise lady she will definitely come putting all the suggestion of her parent beside. If she truly loves you and care for you she will not listen her parent, and she will not come its mean her ultimate goal to tease you and make you mental as her father is (Sorry to say).
    One thing more which I want to mention over here that going in and going out without your permission??? Brother please ! o my dear brother don’t be puppet who is being controlled by his wife and in laws.
    Ye woo zamana ni hay lalay. You have to be bit harsh. Kasam sy apki yee problem sun ky mara meter goom giya hay....
    Allah pak apki sab mushakalain asaaan karay or bhabi Sahiba ko aqal dy or unky ghar waloo ko bi aqal dy ky ap dono ko zindagi guzarny dain.....
    May be I am wrong or most of the people think I am not good but mujay to yahi laga sahi.
    Yar koi Self Respect bi hoti hay Banday ki...kab tk banda bear karay...dosry hum par zulam karty rahan or hum zulam sahtay rahain Islam aisi koi taleeem ni data...So maray bhai I really feel you pain. Jo mujay acha laga i told you.
    Ussy bolo Bibi come over here within the limited time specified by you otherwise you will loss me then try to hug and live your near and dear ones forever. If you care for me then come to me.
    Then wait. Agr wo agaen to fine. Otherwise close this chapter.Buhut si naik parsa larkiyan han dunya ma jinki shadiyan qurbat ki waja sy ni ho pati…..Alllah pak karam karay ga…

    Allah apki Madad karay....

    With Love
    Asim

  17. Dear Asim and rest of you all, Assalam-0-Allaikum,

    When I put my story infront of you to get the best suggestion and advice, I deeply found my self in trouble. I fought for my wife and baby girl child for 1+ year from the day when she leave me.

    Brothers and sisters I am thanking to all of you for your support and corporate and so much appraising advice.

    I made my decision in the end. And I quit my relation with her and I did this decision in 7 months. Just because if she could understand what she is doing is wrong she melt within side her, she could talk to me. But she didn't get back to me and I quit my relation with her.

    May Allah bless you all, And May Allah bless my baby girl child who is reaching to 2 years now. Pray for me and for my child. And Allah will sooner or later will realize my x-wife that she is totally wrong about her foul games.

    Love you all.
    Many Thanks.

  18. Dear Brother,

    This was the ultimate decision. So donot ever feel regret about it. Because any lady who not obey his husband is a unfortunate lady.

    For sure sooner or later she will realize what she has done and she will repent the rest of her life. Anyhow she is going to repent or not thats non of your concern now. I am happy that you made this decision and saved your self respect.

    May Allah bless you every aspect of life and may HE bless you a noble wise obedient wife who will make your life paradise for sure, and you will forget all the worries.

    Surely a woman could make your life either paradise or hell.

    I pray for you, your daughter and your upcoming splendid married life.

    With Love,

    Asim

  19. Can i stop my wife from talking or meeting her parents? Does the law of shariat gives me this right? I do understand it might not be the right thing on social or ethical grounds.

    • Anonymous, we are not muftis. Please submit your question to a qualified Shaikh or Islamic scholar. I agree with your comment that it is not right on ethical grounds.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  20. 24 november 2013 sunday

    • Ali, please register and submit your question as a separate post, and we will answer you in turn, Insha'Allah. And please try to write the whole thing in English.

      Wael
      IslamicAnswers.com Editor

Leave a Response

Cancel Reply