Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Dua for getting married to a good Muslim man

Who to marry?

Who should you marry?

Salam alaikum,

I am a convert to Islam who lives in a Christian country. I haven't met or heard of any Muslims living or being near where I live. It is as if I am the only Muslim in hundreds of miles around, but Alhamdulillah, Allah (swt) guided me to Islam.

I am of marriageable age, but as you might guess I only know Christian men, and as a Muslim girl has to get married to a Muslim, I don't want to and shouldn't get married to any of these men. I know my situation is difficult, but nothing is impossible for Allah (swt).

What dua should I do to get married to a good Muslim man? How should I do it? Please consider that I only know basic prayer.

~ poetry

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10 Responses »

  1. assalamu alaykom

    i think you should be adviced by the admin to perform ISTKHARA PRAYER....


  2. Salaams,

    Just briefly, I would suggest considering moving to another location that has a stronger Islamic community. If you don't know any Muslims at all where you live, this will constrain you in the growth of your deen as well as finding a husband. Since you are a new convert, it is imperative that you get a solid foundation and informed teaching on how to practice Islam, so moving would have myriad benefits for you. Insha'Allah once you've established yourself in a more dynamic Muslim community, you will have no trouble finding prospective husbands.

    -Amy Editor

  3. When you decide, make sure you check that the inlaws are OK with their son marrying a revert to Islam, just so you can enjoy your marriage and not have to deal with inlaws who never accept you.

  4. WOULDNT IT BE NICE if you meet somone on here, and they were in another country and then you meet up an got married , ahhhhh lol, where about do you live I know that sound weird just that I cant imagine a place where muslim arent present or near by at least,

    Istikhara Prayer For Marriage, Life Decisions and Divorce ETC
    Following your Istikhara – The Real Test :
    Now this is the real test of our faith and imaan in Allah (Subhanahu wa ta'ala). Some people have a good sign or feeling and go against it. Others see a bad sign e.g a marriage proposal and still go ahead with the marriage only to suffer the consequences. You have 'sought the good' from Allah and He, in His infinite mercy and knowledge has pointed out the way. Therefore, to go against this would be to your misfortune. This is where we can see the wisdom and hikmah of the Holy Quran:

    "And it is very possible that you dislike something whereas it is good for you; and (similarly) it is very possible that you like something whereas it is bad for you".(Baqarah 16)
    What is Istikhara and how is it performed correctly? This is a very common question and quite rightly so. Will I see a dream? Some colours? A Sign? Or nothing and what if I see nothing? Did I not perform it correctly! How many times do I need to do an Istikhara?

    Istikhara as recommended by the Prophet (pbuh) is such an amazing blessing and a direct answer from Allah. Its a way to get guidance direct from our creator?

    Istikhara, in reality, means “to seek goodness from Allah”.
    “O Allah, I consult You as You are All-Knowing and I appeal to You to give me power as You are Omnipotent, I ask You for Your great favour, for You have power and I do not, and You know all of the hidden matters . O Allah ! If you know that this matter (then he should mention it) is good for me in my religion, my livelihood, and for my life in the Hereafter, (or he said: ‘for my present and future life,’) then make it (easy) for me. And if you know that this matter is not good for me in my religion, my livelihood and my life in the Hereafter, (or he said: ‘for my present and future life,’) then keep it away from me and take me away from it and choose what is good for me wherever it is and please me with it.”
    ‘Allahumma inni astakhiruka bi’ilmika, Wa astaqdiruka bi-qudratika, Wa asaluka min fadlika al-’azim Fa-innaka taqdiru Wala aqdiru, Wa ta’lamu Wala a’lamu, Wa anta ‘allamu l-ghuyub. Allahumma, in kunta ta’lam anna *HADHA-L-AMRA (this matter) Khairun li fi dini wa ma’ashi wa’aqibati amri (or ‘ajili amri wa’ajilihi) Faqdirhu li wa yas-sirhu li thumma barik li Fihi, Wa in kunta ta’lamu anna*hadha-lamra (this matter) shar-run li fi dini wa ma’ashi wa’aqibati amri (orfi’ajili amri wa ajilihi) Fasrifhu anni was-rifni anhu. Waqdir li alkhaira haithu kana Thumma ardini bihi

    *hadha-lamra (This matter) – you need to replace this word with what you are asking Allah for help and guidance about e.g marriage, job, leaving home...


  6. Wa'alaykumsalam,

    Its heartwarming to hear that someone has reverted to Islam alhamdulillah. Congratulations for that and I pray that you find peace, happiness and prosperity within it.

    I've never come across any du'as regarding marrying a muslim man specifically. But du'as can be made in general with your own words and Allah would accept it.

    It was narrated that Ibn ‘Abbaas said: I was riding behind the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) one day and he said: “O boy, I shall teach you some words. Be mindful Allaah and He will take care of you. Be mindful of Allaah and He will protect you. If you ask then ask of Allaah, and if you seek help then seek help from Allaah. Know that if the nation were to gather together to benefit you in some way, they would not benefit you except in something that Allaah has decreed for you, and if they were to gather together to harm you in some way, they would not harm you except in something that Allaah has decreed for you. The pens have been lifted and the pages have dried.” Narrated by al-Tirmidhi (2516).

    Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “How wonderful is the situation of the believer, forall his affairs are good. If something good happens to him, he gives thanks for it and that is good for him; if something bad happens to him, he bears it with patience, and that is good for him. This does not apply to anyone but the believer.” Narrated by Muslim.

    Therefore ask Allah for what you wish and have patience.

    This dua below is for general goodness in this world which can be intended for good pious husband.

    "Rabbana aatina fi'd dunya hasana wa fi'l aakhirati hasana wa qina `adhab an-nar."

    [O Lord! Grant us good in this life, and good in the next, and save us from the torment of the Fire] (Qur'an, 2: 200)

    You can basically make your own du'a like " O Allah, grant me a pious righteous husband who will obey and fear you and who can treat me with love and humility " etc, Its so easy sister 😀 whatever you want ask Allah.

    Narrated by Abu Sa'id al-Khudri
    The Prophet (saws) said, "Any Muslim who makes a supplication containing nothing which is sinful, or which involves breaking ties of relationship, will be given for it by Allah one of three things: He will give him swift answer, or store it up for him in the next world, or turn away from him an equivalent amount of evil." Those who heard it said they would then make many supplications and he replied that Allah was more ready to answer than they were to ask ( Al Tirmidhi )

    Allah said: " And if My servants ask you, O Prophet, concerning Me, tell them that I am quite near to them. I hear and answer the prayer of the supplicant, when he calls on Me. So let them respond to My call and believe in Me. (Convey this to them), perhaps they may be guided aright! (2:186)

    There is a story, there was a man who was stuck in a jungle. Suddenly two hungry lions were approaching him. There are many ways to escape like climbing a tree etc but fear took the best of him and he just stood there and recited " O Allah I seek refuge in you from these lions ", finally the lions came and attacked him 😀 . Where he went wrong ?- He should have used his knowledge/commonsense and climb a tree thus his du'a would come to pass. Allah wouldn't just make him or the lion dissappear lol.
    The moral is Allah gave us knowledge, logic, wisdom etc to make good use of it. Allah won't solve our problems miraculously, we have to do somthing about it first and then Allah can help.
    Similarly, you won't miraculously find a pious muslim husband in a complete non-muslim community. Dua won't help too, first, I would advice the same as sister Amy did, that is move to a muslim community. Its much more easier to find a muslim partner through a masjid or islamic centres and to learn more about Islam. Then your dua would insha'Allah certainly come to pass.

  7. Salaam peotry! Congratulations for accepting islam. May Allah continue to guide you. I support the advice given by sister amy, i think its best you relocate to cities that has significant muslim populations.

    And em! why not you try online islamic matrimonial and social sites? You could make news good muslim friends. And perhaps you could find your potential husband in the islamic matrimonial sites. It works many atimes. Many couples meet online and they are leading a happy life.

    here are some few islamic matrimonial sites. You could google search for more islamic and social sites where you could meet new muslim friends.

    May Allah strenghten your faith in HIM, ameeen.

    • careful on matrimonial sites, talking to a non mahram is haram. go to a mosque, ur imam can in sha Allaah find someone for u, and help u get to know him in a halal way

  8. how we can do istkhara prayer .. please do tell me if someone knows ..

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