Interfering in-laws
Asalam alaykium wa rahamatullah wa barakullah my sliblings in Islam, hope your are well insha Allah. My dearly friend & sister in Islam is in difficult situation. She's seeking for advice, with her permission, I post her situation on behalf of her as her English is not her first language. I want to help her in sha Allaah you all will be able to give her advice.
She used to have relationship with her husband for two years before they got married. The rest of their relationship, it was so great, they both were very happy. She told her family about that guy she wants to marriage, her family are very support her & don't have any problems nor against her wish as long as she is happy then they are happy for her.
Her husband's family were ok at it first until his aunt decided to stir things up and called my friend is a slag even after they meet. My friend is so upset because she met her, they were getting along so well unfortunately the aunt was backstabbing her and spreading fake rumour about her. Her husband's family believe aunt and totally agaisnt the wife.
Hubby's family told him not to married her according to fake rumour but he ignored his family and married his girlfriend infront of witnesses, his family in law etc but the problem is that he hasn't give her dowry at the start of their marriage. Her family in law refused to attend nikkah just because they believe the words out of aunt's mouth. She has destroyed the family in law relation to bride.
They try to move on after dramatic with husband's family, they were very happy as a married couple, husband moved in with his wife 's family home. But then my friend's husband start to miss his family so much, wants to return to his family. He force his wife come to live with his wife but she said no because after what happened to her with family in law, he even strangle her, beat her up & pushed her to the floor. Her mother heard the noise & went in the room & in shocked by what she saw her own son in law beaten up her daughter.
Husband then left his wife for his family, later on he started to realised he wants his wife back unfortunately his family refused. Husband don't know what to do. He explained to his family that whole family & family in law need to sort out the problem but his family refused & wants the husband to divorce his wife & wife's family want her to divorce her husband as well believe other man will treat her better, respect etc.
The wife believes her family in law dislike her just because the colour of her skin as she's dark but they all from the same country, Bangladesh. The wife wants to sort everything out & she text her father in law & said ' Salaam my father in law. Hope you well inshaa Allah. Am really sorry that ur stressed, need sort thing out please bcuz I'm still your daughter in law if you care me but I know that you don't know me well. Support me Allah will reward! I am very upset after bad situation.. Just forget about past..I really love my husband so much and cant get out of my mind.. No one perfect. Life is up and down.. You should expect to give us happy marriage life for Allah swt.. I am surely it wil be peace after sloved pblm!! Inshaa Allah. And I know you have not accept me yet.. Just come to see my marriage certification...then accept thats right way for your process.. Reply me please? I need your company... 'Prophet MUHAMMED (pbuh) said, there are too much hatred in this world. Learn to love and give in return you wil get even far greater than ever.'' The father in law never respond at all , shows he clearly is not interested in his daughter in law.
She don't know what to do, she miss her husband so much, She forgives him. But she told me her husband to her divorce more than 10 times due to pressure from his parents. I wonder if they are officially divorce or not ?
JakaAllah khairu
~Sarah91
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Divorce is not a game and he has "divorced" her 10 times already. He also beats her. He is not a good man and she should let go of him
Sarah91, I find this whole description confusing, I'm sorry. But the previous commenter is right, there is no such thing in Islam as divorcing someone 10 times. After the 3rd divorce, they are irrevocably divorced.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Eidtor
After 3 divorces they not allowed to get married any more!! Let alone 10...her husband beat her god knows what he might do in the future but we not in this sittuation the poor sister is and only she can decide what she wants to do, if they both want to be together then why don't they get their own house and move in together, they don't have to live with her in laws if that's the problem!
I know but sister said she loves her husband very much and she can't let him go . Everyone in her family said her husband is not worth it . I'm sorry I wrote this by phone internet so I probably didn't explain the situation very well.
Sorry I read what I wrote , I realised I made some mistakes. I should go on pc not phone internet. Anyway sister said her hubby said divorce by words & I checked on internet if its officially & he's not divorce his wife officially when due to temps, pressure from his parents, etc I'll post source here in sha Allaah
When does divorce become invalid?In some cases, uttering the words of divorce become invalid. Among these cases is when the husband is: 1. Drunk. 2. Forced to utter them by someone else. 3. In a complete loss of temper to the extent that he is unaware of what he is saying. 4. In an abnormal state of mind, such as temporary madness, epilepsy or in a coma.
From
http://alsunna.org/Divorce-Rules-in-Islam.html
Wrong website I give up & I'll wait until pc then in sha Allah
Now sister said her hubby talks to her so nice
What does this sister want? Does she want to live with the husband? And what does the husband want? It doesn't matter about everyone else around them! They are not gna be living together eating together sleeping together, its the man and wife that are gna be doing this! So exclude everyone else and tell me what do they both want and what's going on!
Asalam Alaykium Muslim Sister
JakaAllaah khairu for your respond, I really dont know. But I will ask sister for you, will get back to you what she really want. At moment, Husband lives with his family & wife lives with her family, you are right. I dont know whats going on apart Husband talks nice to his wife by sms, texts etc oh yes the sister told me that Husband still loves his wife, which is very confusing after his actions toward her. Keep sister in your du'a
Well this is what I think they should do, rather then texting one another sweet things why don't they just meet up and sort this out face to face, and then from there go on and see what they have to do. But please tell him and her not utter divorce over and over again marriage isn't a game that you can divorce ten get back together, its a comittment they both made and they are going to have to work on it
Okay I will do tell sister in sha Allaah
Salaam I needed a dua for my niece she got married 2 years ago it wz a love marriage but she didn’t know hw controlling the in laws were my niece didn’t get to meet there other daughter in law first so she could ask about the family 2 days after the wedding the family started to show there true colours the mother in law always tells her to do all the house work which I know u hv to do wen ur married but not to be treated like a slave the in laws always want her to wait for the father in law to cum bk from work so she has to sit and talk to him which I think is strange yesterday she came to her mums house my niece and her mother in law wz being really horrible to her the father in law keeps saying to the son why don’t u divorce her wen she is never in the wrong she says it’s so hard living there thy treat her really bad please if possible could u help by sending me a dua so she can read and thinks might change allah hafiz