My Husband Calls Me a Jinn
Assalam Alikum Warahmatullah Wabarkatuhu,
When my husband calls me a Jinn I get very sad and depressed. It came as a shock to me when he called me "JINN" for the first time.
I was not very religious in the past. Now I regularly pray five times in addition to Tahajjud and non-obiligatory fasting. I imagine this is the reason he started calling me this.
I wake up for Tahjjud without an alarm. He gets very upset at this. May be this is the reason he calls me a Jinn. I am not sure.
I asked him several times he does not answer. He calls me this in front of my grown children. Whenever the kids starts misbehaving he tells them this is because of your mother who is a Jinn. I asked him several times If I am a Jinn how can you sleep with a Jinn? Why do you then insist on having physical relationship? To this he has no words.
At times, I feel so depressed that I want to end my life (only if was not haram in our religion).
Wasalam,
- Perseverance
Entries(RSS)
Walikum assalaam,
Dear sister, why are u allowing him to upset you with such unintelligent remarks?? If anything, you should be laughing at him for saying something so ridiculous!
I don't know if this is the wisest thing to do lol but here is what I would do: I would sit him down and put an article infront of him that explains what a Jinn is. I'd read it to him like a bed time story and then say "so you see honey, jinns and humans are quite different. If I was a jinn, then you wouldn't be seeing me right now. And if you were aware of all this yet you are giving me this title because of my extra deeds of worship then my dear you have got the wrong title. You should be calling me your angel not jinn, as they are known for excessive worship not jinns." 😀
Embarrass him like that and don't allow this to get to you so much. Play his game with him. Jinns are creatures of Allah just like we are. I know in some cultures they are regarded as the evil unseen monsters and comparing someone to a jinn is worse than that of an animal. Remind yourself how that is not the case, how there can be mumin jinns who are alot closer to Allah and better creatures than many of us.
If you find the a above advice is not for you then I guess you can always choose the more contemporary approach. Sit him down (having made sure he is well fed and rested) and tell him what you have told us. Explain to him how this is bothering you and it needs to STOP. Tell him as the shepherd of the household and father of your grown children, he should know better than to behave in such a way.
Was salaam
Dear Sister,
Does your husband say this to you in a 'joking' manner or is he 'mocking' you?
I ask this, because I have a habit of joking around alot and whilst joking, I have called my sisters 'jinn'. Because we know each others natures, its never been taken offensively. You know better than us what your husband's nature is. It seems that perhaps you are being bullied by him in other ways which collectively is upetting you, otherwise why would you be feeling driven to suicide?
Anyhow, the important thing is that you are feeling offended, so communicate this to your husband. If he is good to you in other ways, I dont see any reason why he will not stop calling you 'jinn'.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
As-salamu Alaykum, Sr. Nourah,
"It doesn't matter if your husband loves you or respects you or not."
"Islam doesn't give you the right to be loved, only maintained, so don't get the two confused."
That is a very cynical view on marriage, Sister.
Love may mean different things to different people, but surely it is important to the married relationship:
"And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your hearts. Undoubtedly in these are signs for those who reflect." [Qur'an 30:21]
Yes, it does matter if your husband respects you, and there are many ways to communicate that to him.
It can start with a respectful conversation between the two of you, then other steps if necessary, such as involving family. Spouses should not be in the habit of calling each other names, period. It is a very bad and destructive behavior that can lead to a total breakdown of the relationship and must be curtailed early.
You don't become a Jinn if your husband kills you a Jinn.
Normal people don't call any human being a Jinn. Your husband is just a low IQed human being.