Parents wont let me marry him as he is not rich
Assalaam-u-alaikum.
I am a 24 year old Muslim girl, I have thus far alhamdulilah been an obedient daughter to my parents. Over a year ago a Muslim Hafez boy has come to propose, we've been together for 2 yers now.
My parents have since been against this marriage, and do not see what I am goin through. The only reason they do not agree is by hear say, and because he is not from a wealthy family, Is this the right thing to be looking for as parents for their daughter, wealth and stature in the community??
I do not know what to do, as I really think this is the right person for me, with regards to nikkah. Would it be advisable, to cut communication with my family and marry him? This is killing me and my parents do not see this.
Sincerely
Sister in distress.
-rayhaana
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Salaams,
I'm afraid I am a little bit confused about your post. You said the boy proposed to you a year ago, but your parents have not accepted him. Are you saying they rejected his proposal, but you continued to correspond with him in spite of this? If that's the case, you are in the wrong. You should not have continued dealing with him if your parents denied his proposal from the time it was offered. At this point, you should cease communications with him and work with your parents on finding a man you both are satisfied with.
Or, did you accept the proposal, and they do realize the choice is yours, but they have been very outspoken with telling your why they don't like him? If that's the case, then you should be grateful they are respecting your choice of a groom, and hope that time will soften their opinion of him. If they are just being grouchy parents but reluctantly going along with your wishes, at least that's something. After you've married and some time has passed, hopefully they will see that money doesn't make the marriage, and it doesn't secure happiness for their daughter.
-Amy
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
The messenger of allah said that women are married for 4 things
1 wealth
2 beauty
3 stutus
4 piety ( their deen )
He said marry the one with piety or may your face be covered with dust ,
".......
Face covered with dust is a arabic saying meaning may you be a looser or something like that .
So the messenger of Allah is advicing the brother/sister to marry for religon not stutus or wealth .
So if this is as you say it is. Then u should marry him
There isno marriage without a wali , who is your father if your father is unjust to you then u can take another wali eg one of your uncles Or brothers or the imam
Yhe messenger of allah said when a person comes to you asking for your daugher in marriage and you are pleased with his religon then marry him to her and if u dwo not thenthere will great fitna ( trials and evil). In the land
So if your father dislikes him even though heis pious then he is wrongnad this will cause distress
..." nb i can not remember if the above ahadith is sauhi or if it weak but the meaning correct ..... In either case it is a proof that ne is wrong. .....
However a word of caution if this brother is poor in the terms of him not having a swimming pool in his backyard or nice car or a big house ......... Then these things are not important marryhim
But !
If him being poor means that he cannot take care of you like buy food or if u get sick take you to the dr then i advice you
Either
1 do not marry him
Or
2 if u all are young make him get a job then marry him
A woman came to the messenger of allah and ask the following men have ask to marry me and the messenger of allah as for mawiah he is poor and as for the abu sufian his stick does nt leave his side ( meaning that he beats women ) and recommended that she marry a 3rd man
So yea he must be able to take care of u , does not have to be rich but has to be able to fed you
Adheim
I wonder if the admins will delete this
And allah knows best