Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I haven’t heard from my husband since we married

innocence flying away


I got married in December 2013. My husband came from America to marry me, but after the marriage my husband couldn't develop any physical relations wth me due to his weakness.  During his stay of 22 days, he even treated me bad and criticized me in every way. Now he has gone back to resume his job,  and I'm stayng back at his place with some days at my parents. What should I do? He has not initiated any contact wth me since he has gone. He will come back aftr 7-8 months.  What should I do?


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4 Responses »

  1. Go back home! This is not a marriage.

    It feels like he was forced to marry you, since he has not bothered to make any contact.

    Call him, email him, whatever and leave a message saying if you do not respond immidiatly I am divorcing you and moving out.

    Find somebody who actually cares about you my dear, don't wait for someone who criticizes you and is clearly unhappy and doesn't care whether you exist on this planet or not.

  2. Salaams,

    So to summarize your situation: you married a man, he spent three weeks with you after that but instead of consummating the marriage spent the time belittling you. Since he left you haven't heard from him, and it will be months before you see him again.

    What happens when you try to initiate the contact? It seems like this is not an ideal marriage by any stretch of the imagination. In fact, it sounds an awful lot like what a man would do if he had another wife and family that he was trying to keep secret from you (or you from them).

    You have to ask yourself if this is how you want to experience your years with him. First impressions do mean something, and the one he made is lousy, in my opinion. If I were in your shoes, I would seek an annullment and look for a new husband who at least acts like he wants me to be a part of his life. You're valuable, sister, and you don't need to settle for the crumbs of a relationship this man is seeming to offer you.

    -Amy Editor

    • he may be gay. a lot of muslim gay men do that. they marry someone back home to shut up their moms and family n friends.

      • Do you want to come to USA? How old is yout husband? Is your husband a US citizen?
        Do you have a desire to settle in USA? Do you have relatives in USA?

        Your huband may be suffering from erectile dysfunction or may be gay or some drug side effects causing his problem. You both needs to go see a sex therapist.

        Why don't you call him and pretend everything is fine and see how he reacts?

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