Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I received a proposal from a Christian women who converted to Islam, shall I accept it?

A/A,

My name is Gowher I am a 27 year old boy. I  had interaction with a Christan girl by the grace of Allah she got converted to islam, she is 33 year old. She proposed me for marriage.

As she told her past life was very bad and she is not virgin as well, what do you suggest me, shall I accept her proposal?

Thanks

- Gowher


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6 Responses »

  1. Walaykumsalaam,

    Accepting Islam washes away one's sins. So if this sister has sincerely and genuinely accepted Islam and corrected and improved her character, then she is permissible for marriage to you.

    However, I would remind you of the importance of looking into this proposal properly as you would with any other proposal - before accepting.

    SisterZ
    IslamicAnswers.com, Editor

  2. as-salamualaikum,
    i really don't know what to say. but all i do know is that you two are from different cultures, and if she has sincerely accepted, then you two are going to be at different levels of iman. and these two points are very hard for a revert woman. a woman who has sincerely reverted is going to be on a different thinking line and will be trying to do everything according to how her creator is most pleased with her. but the male especially from a southasian culture, is going to be on a different thinking line. he might not know/understand the rights of a wife correctly, or his obligations towards his wife. his parents and siblings might be more important to him than his wife, and i'm talking about money. some men are miserly with their wives but spend luxuriously on their parents and siblings. it might be difficult for him to accept her lifestyle since he might not be a perfect muslim in the first place. this in the end might lead her iman to go down after suffering and being pateint for a long time. and the man doesn't understand because isn't this how women are supposed to be treated anyways? i mean isn't she lucky to be married to him?

  3. My ex-husband was a Hindu, converted to Islam. His (step) father was an Iman and so he converted his wife (who was also hindu) to islam. After my husband & i married i realized he did it just to marry me. Almost 10yrs into the marriage and still he diden't fully accept islam. Anyway, the father passed away a few years back, the mother joined back hindu. Oh! this family even went to hajj okay, and his mom think hajj was just a vacation. my husband and me seperated and they are all hindus now.
    So i want to share my life experience with you & becareful with what you are doing especially with people who converts to islam. make sure they are true to heart and believe solely in the pillars of islam.

    • I am so glad I listened to my parents and grandparents a few years back when i thaught i was in love with a non muslim who also said he would convert for me, and they didnt give me permision. 8 years down the line a married to a born muslim and have to sons together Masallah. Ok we have loadsa problems at the moment but one thing i am pleased about is LISTENING to my parents advice 🙂

  4. i agree wit u dat listening 2 parents is good. howeva, parents are not GOD and der fore dat cant in anyway make der decision correct at ol times. they cant in any way confirm or conclude as 2 ones faith. ALLAHknows best as 2 evrybdys faith. are we saying dat there are no reverties dat became best of muslims? who were d people dat established d islam itself?where dey born muslims?d sahabahs, tabiuns,e.t.c? hvnt we c so msny instances where parents destroy d lifes of there childrens marriage cos of there sentiments,and selfish intrest, and later regretted?hvnt we c d marriages dat parents opposed and turn out 2 b d best of marriages in there entire generations?an d opposite person opposed turn 2 b d best inlaw 2 dem?i also caution parents 2 b wary of how dey handle marriages issue considering destiny.

    while as 4 u my sister, take it dat u wldnt hve done otherwise,neither u nor ur parents could hve stopped those 2 kids coming from u and ur former husband or change there father.ALLAH had willed it right frm creation. somebodys husband or wife is one of d destinies ALLAH SWT do write in LAWHUL MAHFUZ after creation, ur children as well.what matters is i urge both parties 2 indulge in DUAUL ISTIIKHARA as it never lie nor decieve anybdy unles we allow our heart desires to over rule us. maassalam.

  5. it sounds like u are having doubts and its not advisable to get married with a doubtful mind. I believe that if the person is meant for u, u will just know because in ur mind u already know the criteria of ur future partner.if u find urself becoming more religious because of the other persons influence, then u know he is rite for u.

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