The end of my world- I lost her!
After a 5 year relationship I have sent a proposal according to the Islamic methods of sending one. My family visits her parents, and her parents visit our home. Her father said he will let us know later after fixing his elder daughter's engagement which is also a love marriage, but the issue is I am urdu-speaking and thay are sindhi-speaking.
I am deeply in love with her, but now she left me because her father somehow fixed her commitment within the family. Her father is continuously telling lies to her that "we have been fixed, we have been fixed", but he said to me "I haven’t fixed, but leave my daughter." My girlfriend told me she didn’t want to go against his family, and she did not even take some time to make an agreement. Our marriage should be a love and arranged marriage too, but my girlfriend left me by saying that she can´t tease her father. She teases me a lot by saying this after 5 years of a relationship that she can´t do anything.
She is about to leave me. I did alot duas, prayers, zhikir, tahajud, virdh...I always prayed to Allah having complete faith, but now when Allah is not listening my duas I am very much disappointed. My friends all have boyfriends and girlfriends, and they all got their love. They are happily married. When I see them I feel like I am lost and I am finished, because everyone gets their love but why am I suffering? Allah SWT says He always listen to our prayers, and we should keep praying because duas change our kismat...then where my duas are going?
It is written in the quran that everything is written and decided about our life, but duas can change destiny. I know that is true- we are muslims and believe in ALLAH and QURAN, but where are my duas going?? I am so disappointed that I want to give up in my life. My faith is getting weaker and weaker. I really don´t want to do this to myself but I've gotten so depressed now because I can´t live without her. Everything’s is finishing between me and my love, but I still talk to her. I feel like if I do not listen her voice i will die.
Please let me know what is my mistake? If Allah wants us apart, then why did He make me fall in love with her so madly?? Allah brought love in my life, and I really don´t know what to do. Please let me know of any dua so that I can get my girlfriend back in my life so we get married.
Now my condition is like this: people say I'm psycho. People laugh at my condition. I myself am tired now- always crying and sad. Please help me out- let me know any dua I can pray to Allah that will bring back my love (my girlfriend) into my life, and if ALLAH can do this then please give me maut. I don´t wanna live now. Please pray for me that I may get my love back in my life, otherwise I am sinking. ;(
-Hasan
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ASSALAMALAIKUM-
SEE THE 1ST THING IS OBEDIENCE BY WHICH WE COME IN THE JURISDICTION OF ACCEPTANCE OF DUAS-
AND FOR THAT WE ONLY SAY WE BELIEVE IN ALLAH AND QURAN AND DO WHAT EVER WE LIKE GO ABOUT START HARAM RELATIONSHIP LAND IN TROUBLE WITH THE INFLUENCE OF SATAN WHO WANTED YOU TO DEFY ALLAH IN THE MATTER OF PRE MARITAL RELATIONSHIP AND AND WHEN THE INFATUATION BROUGHT ABOUT NEGATIVE RESULT YOU ARE ASKING WHERE ARE MY DUAS GOING-
YOUR DUAS ARE WILL BE EFFECTIVE ONLY IF YOU LIVE IN HALAL JURISDICTION AND THE SAME WAS SHATTERED BY YOU WITH 1ST GOING ABOUT SEARCHING FOR A GIRL FRIEND WHICH IS HARAM IN ISLAM-
Please let me know what is my mistake? If Allah wants us apart,THIS ALLAH WANTED FROM B4 YOU CONTACTED HER AND FELL IN THE QUICK SAND OF INFATUATION-
HE DIDNT MAKE YOU FALL INSTEAD HE WARNED DONT FALL-
then why did He make me fall in love with her so madly??THIS IS -INFATUATION-INFATUATION-INFATUATION-
NOT LOVE -LOVE STARTS ONLY WITH THE BLESSING OF ALLAH BY PERFORMING NIKAH-
WITHOUT HIS BLESSING WHAT YOU CALL LOVE IS OPP POLES ATTRACTION-
AND GET SWAYED BY THE UNDERCURRENTS OF THAT ATTRACTION AND LABEL IT AS LOVE-
SORRY WRONG IS YOUR JUDGEMENT U DONT KNOW WHAT IS LOVE-
ONE MORE THING DONT EVER THING THAT YR LIFE YOUR RIGHT-
THE OWNER OF YR LIFE IS ALLAH AND BECAUSE YOU TOOK A WRONG STEP AND WHEN THE CONSEQUENCES HAPPENED YOU START THINKING YOU IMAN IS BECOME WEAK
SORRY YOUR IMAN IS STRONG SATAN IS MAKING YOU THINK LIKE THAT-SEE HIS CHALLENGE -
Satan Disowns His Followers[ONE WHO TAKES LIFE BECOMES HIS FOLLOWER-
[Quran 14:22] And the devil will say, after the judgment had been issued, "God has promised you the truthful promise, and I promised you, but I broke my promise. I had no power over you; I simply invited you, and you accepted my invitation. Therefore, do not blame me, and blame only yourselves. My complaining cannot help you, nor can your complaining help me. I have disbelieved in your idolizing me. The transgressors have incurred a painful retribution."
[Quran 7:17] "I will come to them from before them, and from behind them, and from their right, and from their left, and You will find that most of them are unappreciative."
Satan will claim the majority:
[Quran 17:62] He said, "Since You have honored him over me, if You respite me till the Day of Resurrection, I will possess all his descendants, except a few."
Satan has no power over God's worshipers:
[Quran 17:65] "As for My servants, you have no power over them." Your Lord suffices as an advocate.
[Quran 15:40-42] "Except those among Your worshipers who are devoted absolutely to You alone." He said, "This is a law that is inviolable. "You have no power over My servants. You only have power over the strayers who follow you.......
http://www.missionislam.com/health/suicidenotescape.htm
Dua for Grief and Sorrow – Commentary by Ibn Al-Qayyim
It is recorded in Musnad Ahmad and Sahih Abu Hatim on the authority of ‘Abdullah bin Mas’ud that the Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said,
"Whoever was afflicted with grief and distress and says (see the following Dua), Allah, the Exalted and Ever-Majestic, will remove his grief and will change his sorrow into happiness." It was said, "O Messenger of Allah! (Do) we have to learn these words?" He said, "Yes, whoever hears them should learn them."
http://www.iqrasense.com/dua-from-quran-and-hadith/dua-for-grief-and-sorrow-commentary-by-ibn-al-qayyim.html3Y
OUR LIFE IS NOT SO CHEAP THAT YOU FALL FOR SOMEONE BY GOING AGAINST ALLAH'S COMMANDS[PRE MARITAL RELATIONSHIP]THEN FALL AND SUFFER THEN GET UP ONLY TO THINK YOU ARE THE BOSS OF YOUR LIFE SORRY NO YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS NEITHER YR LIFE IS SO CHEAP AND DOWN TRODDEN THAT YOU CAN EVEN THINK OF LOOSING FOR THE SAKE OF THIS UNFAITHFUL HARAM RELATIONSHIP -BECAUSE IT IS INFATUATION IF SHE WAS TRUE SHE WOULD HAVE TOLD THIS
SO ALLAH WAS WITH FROM THE START AND NOW ALSO SEE THIS IS THE WORLD FOR WHICH YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT GIVING LIFE-
She teases me a lot by saying this after 5 years of a relationship that she can´t do anything.TURN TO ALLAH...
“O Allah! I am Your Slave”
“You have control over me.”
“Your Judgment is executed on me. Your Decree on me is just.”
“I ask You by each Name of Yours.”
“Make the Quran the spring (delight) of my heart.”
SO TURN TO ALLAH MAKE YOUR LOVE FOR HIM-NOT FOR THIS DIRTY SELFISH WORLD-AGAIN REPEAT
She teases me a lot by saying this after 5 years of a relationship that she can´t do anything...
REGARDS
Read very very carefully otherwise the devil will lead you to point of "no RETURN" which ALLAAH (Subhanahu wa ta'ala) DON"T WANT AT ALL,
It is your prayers that lead me to answer your questions here. Allaah (Subhanahu wa ta'ala) sent me to answer your queries here. Now read carefully but not emotionally.
Since 5 years if you have been in that state of love affair and she is all your world. Isn't it. And your answer is "Yes! It is". Who to blame you or her? Who to complain you or her? By whom the mistake has been done? Will you say Allaah (Subhanahu wa ta'ala) told you to love her and then eventually after 5 years she will say a "BIG NO" to you and you said that Allaah (Subhanahu wa ta'ala) Has Planned this for you already? Here are your answers below,
Brother! To love someone is not a sin. But to love someone out of the limits of Allaah (Subhanahu wa ta'ala) is a sin. I know that you had no physical relationship with her, even if you did, then there is a problem. If no, even then there is a problem. Why? Who told you to do so without "Nikkah". Before 5 years you should had thought that. Now you will say I don't know that I will fall in love with her. Correct! But it happened isn't it. Correct!. That's why Allaah (Subhanahu wa ta'ala) Has this big plan called "Nikkah". Now, you will say what about Nikkah after 5 years and now why is my prayers are not being answered. Your prayers are being answered. Yes! Prayers are answered alhumdulillah! Allaah (Subhanahu wa ta'ala) wants you to be safe. And learn some lesson. I think you have not done any physical relationship with her. That is your safety of believe. That is great. But if you have done anything in these 5 years now you have to "repent".
You know their family now. Correct! Let her move apart from you. The more you think about her the more you will feel miserable. Why? Because it is you who have made this choice before 5 years. Forget the money you have spent on her. Forget the time you have spent on her cause that was the devil who want you to become his partner and made your deeds look good to you without letting you know. Now the devil wants you to make a suicide and you will go directly to the hell. That is the big plan of the devil. Now you are already feeling like a hell. And devil wants you to be in this hell forever. You want solution and you want peace and you want to move out of this hell. Correct! Then listen to what I said above. And do the following,
1. Stop feeling guilty.
2. Repent the mistake you have done 5 years before.
3. Pray 5 times a day.
4. The big surprise is waiting for you yes another girl thousand times beautiful and good as your previous love.
5. Stop thinking that you are a psycho. Because that is what really devil wants you to be. Will you let the devil win over you. Of course not.
6. No one has taken your dignity.
7.Get back on your feet man! You already have an experience of a life time. Now no more foolish mistakes.
8. Get a girl with Good Faith and Believe and marry her. Who prays 5 times a day.
9. Your Heaven is waiting.
10. Now it is your turn to select the Heaven or the Hell.
11. Don't let your desires take over you. Otherwise people will "use" you.
12. Study more and advance your career and make yourself rich and show them. And then Thank Allaah (Subhanahu wa ta'ala)
You have been answered alhumdulillah!
May Allaah Pardon you and show You the right path Amen!
Allaah Knows the Best!
As Salaamu Alaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu,
Heart touching reply, May Allah ease our brother Hasan's pain and bless him and all of us. Ameen .
Fee Aman Allah.
Was Salaam
Walaikumusalam warehmatullah e wabarakatuhu! SisterN!
jazaaki-llaahu khairan!
Suma Amen! Ya Rabb!
Fee amanillaah! (jazaaki-llaahu khairan!)
Allaah Knows the Best!