Proposal for Christian woman to be second wife to Muslim man
Hello. I need your opinions & repsonses.
I would like to know if anyone has a successful polygamous relationship & what is the hardest part of being or having second wife?
This man has asked me again to marry him & become 2nd wife so we can have a relationship. (Second marriage is not acknowledged by local government.) I told him I am not comfortable being 2nd wife but he fears asking for divorce again because of the havoc it created years earlier (before I knew him.) Plus he is doubly scared because he has seen the outcome of my own divorce (allowed in Eastern Orthodox) & I have been nearly ruined financially. So I sort of understand his reservations. And since Islam allows polygamy, well quite frankly, why should they go through that mess?
Does his wife & her family have to accept me? How bad can it be? We each have our own homes & incomes. She has large family, I have very small. She has no children, I have 2. She is traditional, I am modern. She does not like having him around & I do. We both live within 30 minutes of each other but he is hoping I will move to the town where he works which is 2 hours away.
The main issue I would need to battle is jealousy. His main residence is with her & I know I will feel left out. I am already feeling left out. He was hoping for us to be married before Ramadan but this is not possible for me. So he has said that we can not see each other during Ramadan & the following Eid celebration. This is going to be very difficult for me & makes me wonder if I should wait for him or not. I have already tried to break off relations with him & we both were heartbroken. After only 4 months my heart says jump.
I will not lie- we love each other & at our age, it is hard to find. But I am petrified of making a wrong decision. And I don't like the thought of being "sacrificed" for Ramadan. Please help me work these issues out. I can not find a Muslim counselor & no one I know can possibly relate.
Peace to everyone.
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