Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Desperate to have sex but no one wants to marry me

islamic guide

Dear everyone on this Forum,

Thank you so much for taking the time to answer my question, because I am in need of dire help. May Allah reward you for your efforts. I’m an 18 year old single Pakistani Muslim girl in England. I have not received any proposals of marriage or anyone showing interest in me marrying their son. It is not because of my physical appearance that I am not receiving proposals. I am told often that I am very attractive by other Muslim women. I have long hair, I am tall, I am slim but curvy, and have fair skin (not that these qualities are important). I am also told to have a very good fashion sense by other girls at my university. I am also considered to be intelligent since I studying medicine, so I am also very studious, and have a secure and fruitful financial future ahead of me inshallah, thank God.

I am also quite religious. I do my five daily prayers, read the Quran regularly, give 2.5% of my income to charity, study 5-6 hours of medicine a day to be the best doctor I can be in order to serve the ummah. Allah is always on my mind. It seems I have beauty, religion, wealth and good family.

Here is the problem,

1) I desperately want to have sex. I think about sex practically 24 hours a day. 5 minutes don’t go by without me thinking about sex. It is seriously distracting me from my studies. I don’t masturbate or watch pornography, even though I really want to, because I know it’s haram. I have done research and seen that some Sheikhs say that masturbation is not haram if you are in desperate danger of committing adultery, and for this reason, I have tried to masturbate. However, I don’t think I’m doing it properly and it has no effect on me whatsoever. Perhaps it is because I’m a virgin but I don’t know the exact mechanism. But the point is that this isn’t providing me with any much needed relief.

2) Since I am so desperate to have sex, I know the only Islamic solution for my desires is to get married. Therefore, I am desperate to get married so I can have sex. The problem is no one wants to marry me. I have thought about solutions to this so I can get married but there are many problems. Let me discuss these issues:

1) I know many people say that if the girl has no offers of marriage, her family should propose to a religious boy. However, the girl cannot ask the boy to propose in my culture or she will be defamed for life and no boy will propose marriage to her after that and she will be a laughing stock. Therefore, sadly, this isn’t a realistic solution.

2) My family doesn’t have many connections. I never grew up around big family networks where one day one of those families would ask me to marry their son. I would like to think I am a caring person but unfortunately, there are not many people who know of my good qualities to want their son to marry me. Other girls have large networks of Muslims who are able to network for them and find them a husband. Unfortunately, I do not have this large family structure.

For this reason, even my parents think that I will have to find someone on my own (all done Islamically of course – i.e. no talking without mahram, only talking for the purposes of marriage). Since I am 18 the only way a man can decide to marry me is from seeing me at university. So every day at university I am wearing the most attractive, beautiful clothes in order to attract a husband for myself. There are Muslim boys in my medicine class but they are not thinking about marriage at all. After all they are only 18 and not very mature. Although they have approached me, it was only to ask for my name. I can see they are not serious about pursuing marriage with me.

4) My attempt to find a husband from university has failed so far, I am still as single as always. The only other option I have is to consider online marriage websites (again, all done islamically) so I can ‘widen my net’ and have a higher chance of coming across a man who is interested in marrying me. My parents say that since I am 18 I won’t be able to find a good man from online as I have had a quick look and most of them are divorced and much older than me (35+). I know that as long as they’re religious I shouldn’t care about their age, but at the same time I know that if I married them I would not be happy with such an old man and the marriage would be highly likely to end in divorce.

My parents think that I should wait until I finish my medicine degree to get married – at 24 or 25, but I don’t know what would change 6 years from now. I still probably won’t have any offers of marriage, and I don’t understand why I can’t get married now when I am so mature, am a fantastic cook, excellent at managing a house and think about sex 24 hours a day and need islamic relief. Also, I would be the perfect wife because I would be more than willing to have sex with my husband whenever he wants, and do everything I can to make him happy.

As you can see, I am a very deep thinker and I have investigated every corner of my enormous sexual desires to find a possible solution but nothing has worked, and although I pray to Allah to either give me a husband or remove me from my sexual desires, or remove me from this Earth because it’s just too hard :(, nothing has happened. Thank you for reading all of this. My question is, considering all these factors, if you were in my situation, what would you do? What should I do??


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46 Responses »

  1. All what i say that sexual desires are need of body . But as we control over other needs and desires you should treat with this desire by your own will power . To control sexual desires you should fast ( soum ) there are ahadeeth of Rasool SAW about this . My english is not that much good so i cant go in expination . I pray for you . May Allah help you and bless you .

  2. Salam, I'm glad you wrote in, hopefully we can provide some advice to help you.

    Your quite young and its perfectly natural and normal to feel the way you do, I'm pretty sure at least 90% of girls and boys your age are going through the same dilemma, and it can be quite frustrating! It does get easier to control with time though.

    I understand what you mean by getting married to fulfil your desires in a halal manner, but marriage comes with other responsibilities too, it's not just about sex - so you need to be mentally ready for those too and be able to keep a good balance between studies and home life ( I know how intense medicine is)!

    It seems like most of your time is spent studying, which again is the norm for most medical students, but you need to find a hobby that's more physical so your able to release some of that energy. Taking up sports/gym on a regular basis will help use up that physical energy and keep you distracted too. Try not to spend too much time alone, sit with people, socialise with your family/friends etc to keep yourself distracted. Obviously don't watch or do anything that will further provoke your sexual desires. It will take some time and patience but you will inshaAllah learn to control your urges.

    If you really feel strongly about marriage and have thought it through, then stay positive, it will happen at the right time with the right person inshaAllah. Let your parents know of your intentions to marry, in the Asian community there are usually lots of 'auntys' who are matchmakers - they may be able to introduce you to some potentials. Also, I'm not sure which online site your using but there are plenty that have younger brothers on there.

    Also, with regards to dressing up to attract guys at uni might not be a good idea. As you know it's difficult at this age to control your urges and the last thing you want is to fall into sin. If a guy does approach you for marriage, do things the Islamic way. Avoid meeting him alone or having intimate conversations with him. Get your parents involved and get to know him with a chaperone.

    I pray Allah swt makes things easier for you, Ameen.

    • I am glad you have responded her sensibly and gently, its the best solution to engage yourself and avoid such thoughts regarding sex.....

      Allah bless you, ameen

  3. i understand what you are going through, but never rush into marriage. i know you want to have sex, but that is a small aspect of marriage. if your not mentally prepared for marriage life, you will have problems. also guys your age are not mentally prepared for marriage no commitments.

    believe it or not, vast majority of proposals come around the age of 22-26 ish. continue with your study, and if you find a proposal whilst you studying then decide what you like to do, since its possible to get married and study at the same time.

    if you can't get married, then fast. ask Allah to bless you with a spouse and to make things easy.


  4. Assalaamu Alaykum,

    I just want to make a quick point here. Even if you did have someone to marry, even if you were getting married next week, that is not the end-all solution to your sexual desire issues. Just because you've married doesn't automatically mean your husband will know how to satisfy you sexually, or that sex will be what you expected- most often for women it's not what is expected at all. And if you're marrying a chaste man who saved himself for marriage, he will probably have no clue what to do with you and rely on you to tell him what you need.

    So you need to know what will satisfy you. Personally I agree that masturbation is permissable for single people who are struggling like yourself. But for women, masturbation is about stimulating the clitoris more than it is about the actual vagina. The raw truth is, if you know how to satisfy yourself, then you're in much better shape to teach your husband how to satisfy you when you marry.

    Maybe you'll get a proposal sooner, maybe it will come later. Regardless, it makes no sense to keep putting yourself through hardship. What are you gaining by that? I agree you shouldn't be watching pornography, but familiarizing yourself with your body and what it responds to will help you in the short term and the long term.

    Keep in mind that many married women do not climax simply from intercourse. Clitoral stimulation is vital in many cases. Men don't know anything about that, except what their women teach them. So you have to learn something yourself, to teach your future husband.

    -Amy Editor

    • Salam sister

      Thank you for writing and looking for a solution that can keep you from doing the Haram thing.

      However, masturbation is never a solution, you will just fuel those desires more and more, because you will be feeding it to grow even more. after that you will definitely want the real thing.

      Now you do not know how sex feels, that is why what you are feeling is still the basic desires.
      Once you know how it feels you are doomed.

      So save time, and by all means get married, and fulfill your desires in a halal safe environment. Elder people are better choice for you 29+, as you need guidance and experienced husband who can take care of you, not a kid 18 or 19, you need a real man.

      another solution is go and see a doctor, check your glands and hormones, you might be suffering form something that the doctor can help with

      Make duaa, and wish you all the luck

  5. simply sounds abnormal to me cause u said u can't spend even 5 minutes without thinking of sex!!! tell me one thing, do u have this thought while u r on prayer too?? if so then may be there is a devil/shaytan/jinn with u who has taken control of ur mind to make u think vulgar or fantasy.
    so always pray to Allah so that u can recover and have a normal psychology.

    • I respect what your saying Rabiya but I think constantly thinking about sex is quite common in teenagers/youngsters, it's a normal part of growing up.

  6. I don't think it's appropriate for you to hand out your email add!

  7. I don't think it is allowed to place personal information on the website. Please don't write to people you don't know sis, hence don't write to the above email.

  8. Why not
    We can discuss people
    their problem but can not help them
    Why not maam.

    I disagree. If i wish to help someone i mean to help

  9. I strongly advice you to start looking for a husband because it will be years before you find someone suitable.Start looking while your young because the older people get its harder to be accepted.

    DO NOT HAVE SEX BEFORE MARRIAGE. Don't join the internet looking for a man most will take advantage. Get your family involved in searching a spouse for you. And be alert and strong when the times right you will know.

  10. Usually hypersexuality is related to more frequent masturbation, watching porn and/or having large number of sexual partners.

    In your case you even did not enjoy masturbation. I am sure being being a medical students you know sensitive points of a woman's body that respond to touch.

    I wonder if you have high levels of testasterone, estrogen.

  11. Sister, as other people said, my opinion is also same that it is common in this age, don't try to attract any boys because they will also thinking same way you are at this age, it may lead to commit zina, then how can be that an islamic way, allah says in Qurran I will test every sole, allah may be testing you. The way to control sex is fasting and not being alone, and reading books. May allah give you sabr and good and caring husband. Ameen.

  12. As advised by some one marriage may or may not solve your problem .We have seen cases where despite being married some spouses are unsatisfied sexually .

    Your desires are natural but you need to find the solution on your own . I think the best solution islam gives is to first set the right attitude .like avoid looking at opposite sex ,avoid sitting in places which promotes these feelings ,avoids all the places which can lead to haraam places . Also it talks about fasting .Try it as and when you can do fasting .

    I will suggest you to first set the right attitude but if you feel somewhere you have found the right person then you can go for the marriage but keeping in mind marriage may or may not solve your problem ..

    As sister Amy has rightly said if some one has kept him chaste for whole life then he might not know any thing about women sexuality and it will be difficult for him to satisfy.

    • hey i do not think there is anything wrong in marriage why are we making marriage such a difficult thing ? when the propeht peace be upon him married ayesha ra how old was she ? 9 right , also i know zina is the biggest sin in islam and it is not right to do that so which is not halah we should not and what is halah we should not make it hard to do right ?? i know marrying the boy the same as your age will be difficult as two immature people can not stay together but they can as well well it depends on them if you look around in western society at 18 years the boys earn themselves and if there gf get pregnant they take there baby responsibilty as well showing they are more mature than our society men and also why have we made such a big wall of requirments saying the girl should finsih her education then marry and man should do this and that the important thing is the man should feed his wife and the wife is mature enough and ready physically which she is i do not think why she should not get married or wait ? its protecting her religion and no wrong in marriage lets pray for her to get married soon if we can not find a spouse for her and also these desires are not wrong they are normal everyone have them but its just a taboo to discuss it and also lets the couple live there life the way they want who are we to scare them with the responsibilities

  13. Assalamu Walaikum Sister,
    Allah will fullfill your wish In-Sha-Allah. You will get a nice loving husband, but do not show your attraction to any boys or girls, this way will lead you to commit zina. You are still so young but in the Islamic guideline you are eligible of marriage, but do not leave your studies if you marry at this age.

  14. assalamualaikum Sister. Sexual desires is normal, but my personal opinion I would not make a dua to take away something Allah put there. Be patient and make dua. My baby brother haves a Muslim female doctor and she is from Pakistan. She told us that she want to get married when she was younger but her parents wanted her to finish medical school and she said she regretted to this this day. after she finished medical school it took her awhile to find a husband. she now only haves one child and she wants more but she said she is to old to have another one. My best advice is when it comes, take it. but make sure you make istikhara before you marry anyone. Do not go on dating websites because a lot of men are on there for not good reasons and this is your first time getting married, be patient. It might not be easy but it will pay off inshallah

  15. try eating food that lowers your drive, some examples of these would be things like coffee, mint , cheese, popcorn and many others, you can search them up online.

  16. Dear Single girl,

    IF your situation is true as in the explanation, it is normal in case of boys in the age . I am not sure about girls because they dont tell the truth.Dont worry I will give you some suggetions with my limited knowledge and experiences.May Allah keep you away from sin.


    You are 18 mean its age to get married.Its the responsibility of your parents relatives to find a hubby for you.
    Do your prayes and make dua to get a good hubby.Mean while you can fast to control your urges and divert your thoughts to other things like reading good books,gardening,reciting quran etc in free times.Even though masterbation is undesirable,you can perform thuat to control your self,but no to haram things in fantacy and not to get adicted with masturbation.Not to use any external meterials like sex toys.
    You have to express your wish to get married to your mother or some auts (relative) who are frendly with you.


    As you are a studing your parents will thing nikah after finishing the studies.It is normal,Then you have to infrom them directly or indirectly about your intention to get married.Dont try Any shortcut to enjoy sex.
    Dont go behind a man you canot belive one you not really know, so involve your parrents in chosing your hubby
    Your are desparate to have sex you are ready to do what all are possible th is good, every man from his heart wish to have a wife like you.a lucky person will marry you and you both can enjoy life.But for the time
    being you have to find some masturbation techinic for self satisfaction that will help you in future to get satisfaction from your hubby also.According to me it is import to find your way to get satisfaction yourself then only your hubby can easly bring that to you.Speak with your frends(girls) .And if some of your frens have an elder brother thing on that way.

    good luck

    • "I am not sure about girls because they dont tell the truth."

      First of all, it is normal for girls/women to crave and want intimacy--this is not exclusive to men and/or boys.

      Secondly, your statement about girls not telling the truth is baffling. Lying, like craving sex and intimacy, yet again, is not exclusive to any particular gender.

      • sorry for my comment if it hurts any body.

        i don't meant that women are not telling truth.
        According to me most ladies don't express there wish and desire of sex,they keep it as secret even if they are craved.they will unfold there sexual feeling in front of there husbands only.

        with all respect to all ladies... Sorry if you are hurt.

        I respect the this girl very much because she is ready to what ever possible to make her hubby happy,according to me all wifes should be like that.And men will like a wife like that sure.

    • Dear Explorer

      Hyper-sexuality do exist in girls, she is suffering brother , so pray for the sister. She urgently need marriage.

      she has only 2 options
      - Medications
      - Marriage to a responsible mature man ( not young childish teenager).

      Masturbation is out of the question.

      May Allah help you.

  17. Asalaamu-alaikum,

    I don't think I can give you any better advice than you are already given by brothers and sisters.

    You seem really nice and mature person therefore I could proposed you as I am single from UK and looking for practising Muslim life partner but this might be too weird for you. I wish there was a to get in touch with you and tell you more about myself.
    Forgive me if any Muslim brother or sister thinks this is disrespecting as I didn't mean to
    Jazakallah khair

  18. You need to cut down on foods that lower sexual drive and you need to train your mind. That will help you know how to think and avoid tempting your sexual organs. I suggest you find someone to get married to or get married while you study. And I totally disagree with you as there is someone out there for everyone and you should not turn any stone unturned. I would try friends , marriage vents, websites just to find the right one. There are decent people out there and you need to keep trying.

  19. Sister Bucks has given best response overall in my opinion. One thing I must mention is food and keeping yourself "cool". You are studying medicine so hopefully you are already aware of the fact some foods/ingredients increase body heat making you want sex. My wife never confessed but being married for > 18 years I can tell there are such foods, and "social moments" when she gets aroused more often than normal. She never said so, and I never asked but I can tell just from experience. Now from male's perspective I can confirm there is long list of food items: fried food, ground beef, spices, dry fruit, etc. makes me go nuts. Others might have different body chemistry but I feel this is true

    So hopefully someone from sisters side can come up with list of foods for you to avoid. I can think about drinking plenty of water, and using traditional drinks that are known to control body heat. All in all keeping body heat low and avoiding arousing atmosphere should help a little is what I am trying to say.

    Why atmosphere? I think when humans are among opposite gender just a simple thought releases hormones in our body causing arousal so my recommendation would be to consider body heat lowering techniques and avoid arousing atmosphere as much as possible (till you have finished studies or found a husband without seeking for one - believe me someone will come forward without you seeking :-))

    PS: My personal opinion on marriages is little different though: Parents are committing a sin for not marrying their kids when it is time for their kids to get married according to my knowledge but that is another debate

    PSS: I think my post is duplicate; I should have been through all posts before making a comment. Just saw Haider's comment above mine saying pretty much the same thing. Leaving my comment here to further emphasize the importance of body heat. Thanks!

  20. wow ur in the same situation..

    feel free to contact me i am muslim male 23 single doing post graduation and eagerly waiting for to getting married u can contact me on my whats app **********

    • Sorry Babar, we do not allow posting private contact info on our forum, and we do not allow our website to be used for matrimonial purposes.

      Wael Editor

      • what the hack man..just wanted to contact that girl i am single to..and i think i might be her future spouse ..:P just allow my single message

        • Quit trolling, go on or something, and btw its haaram to converse with non mehram women

          • I think it's ridiculous how sites like these stop youngsters from getting married. Why are Muslims so backward? Shes a decent girl, shes not going to have casual sex with the guys who contact her on this page! Loosen up and help these youngsters get married. Gosh, no wonder it's so damn hard for them to marry, our community is too impractical. I would advise this girl to marry a non Asian guy. Her marriage will happen much quicker

          • To Fatima’s reply September 16, 2021

            As in Asian, you mean specifically south Asian men. What’s wrong with them? You are stating it’s important to help youngsters to get married.

          • Sister Fathima,

            You are are making some generalizations, and have other misconceptions.

            Asian guys are no worse than other guys. You will find good and bad people everywhere, in every locality, in every nation. What's impractical is cutting out one option altogether when one is in dire need of a spouse.

            Also, this site's mission is to help struggling Muslims with their troubles and provide sound Islamic advice. It is not a matrimonial service. However, there are several such services out there and you should feel free to utilize them.



  21. Best option just focus on your career/study that will help you
    I'm telling from my experience in 26 unmarried and virgin offcourse
    And not thinking about marriage until I become some one of status
    Meaning financially better

    As a result in into preparing my exams and concentrating only on that

    This helped me and kept me away from haram like masturbations porn etc

    Try this

  22. Its like im reading my own story. Although i live in pakistan but im still single and my age is 28. I always thought the same way then i decided to complete my studies and then may b i'll find my life partner but nothing changed for me. I even socialized with some boys but they even didn't proposed me for marriage. I did lots of wazifaz for marriage but nothing positive happened. I think may be Allah has not created a partner for me and i have to accept this reality and live my life lonely..

  23. May Allah make it easy for you....i am in campus and i am literally dying too to have sex..sorry to say this..and at times..i thought of killing myself before doing zinaa....and masturbation. Doesnt work for mee too.....i would have married but i have no single cent soo...i am depressed may Allah make it easy for you and make you get a pious husband..who will marry..
    I would have proposed to you but i have no money to sustain our home in shaa Allah
    That is why i am praying for you

  24. Asalam u Alaikum wa rahmatullah, Sis, I just cannot tell you how much your story relates to mine, except that i am a boy.

    I am also a medical student, in my 1st year of medicine, Pakistani as well, 20 years of age. Alhamdulillah good looking as told to me by my friends and i am completely realistic about my looks, not exaggerating at all. Excellent at house managing and highly religious. And i suffer from the exact same thing: excessively crippling sex drive. I literally punch my sofa in anger because of this issue. But cant marry, because who would give their daughter in marraige to me when i dont even earn to sustain my ownself, as i am only a student.

    I dont keep girlfriends, and i dont even talk to girls of my college, although almost all have tried to approach me. This is actually killing me, because i try to stay as halal as possible and cant find an outlet for my male carnal desires. So i guess you get the point.

    Now i'll try to tell you what has helped me tremendously:

    1. Fasting: Even though this remedy was recommended by the Prophet Muhmmad (peace be upon him) himself but very few muslims act upon it. Just try it please, and by fasting i mean, continuous fasting like 4 to 5 days consecutively. It wont affect you for about 3 days at first, but on the 4th or 5th day, somethings gonna happen. You'll fall in love with fasting and you will experience the sweetness of emaan. Please try it, please, it is an excellent way of curbing your desires.

    2. Mastering patience over yourself: Patience has degrees, the greatest one is Sabarun Jameel. It is that degree, in which you donot even show signs of impatience, let alone talking about your problems. Collect all the Quranic verses about patience and commit them to your heart. And recite them in your dark and difficult days. It helps drastically.

    3. Translation of the Quran: Please read the translation of the Quran as a must, each and every single day. Donot miss it at all. It strengthens you spiritually to fight with shaytan on your difficult days. Read 4 verses or even less, but please read the Quran

    4. Accepting fate: Now this step is probably the most difficult one to accept. Be patient. Make a lot of dua. Allah will definitely find a perfect match for you. But leave it on your fate. And please donot be desperate for boys. Believe me, if a guy likes you, then he'll like you even in your normal attire, wearing a scarf. No need to buy any expensive and fancy clothes. Again, please donot be desperate for boys, Allah knows your desires, He will help you with whatever fits exactly into the puzzle of your life.

    Lastly do not go near masturbation and pornography, it will suck the very soul out of your body. It will drain your emaan and your happiness. Believe me, and dont even look at it as a means of escape, please, it will bring you no good.

  25. Salaam,

    It's very hard but you have to be strong and pass the test from Allah. Allah tests us all and the strongest of us are tested greatly, be strong and Allah will reward you inshAllah. It has been a while since you posted this, have you been able to find anyone for marriage?

  26. I used to have the same feeling....then i joined sports. You can join a gym or any sports it will release your hormones and believe me definitely it will workout.

  27. I am hiding my identity on purpose because I would be embarrassed.

    I am here searching for Islamic help. I am 22 but a boy and have exactly the same kind of problem since 18. I wish I could get married but it is just not possible. I wish I was born a century back where it would be much easier.

    I am a mechanical engineer doing his masters...

  28. I am a Medical Student of third year.I don't know how by mistake I clicked on this link.
    You should know in general females get sexual pleasure and also reach sexual orgasm from clitorial stimulation.They do not get sexual pleasure from vaginal penetration so what is it that makes you anxious about having sex with a boy.Yes sex will give him pleasure (they get pleasure from vaginal penetration) not you.
    Although sexual desire is normal it's psychic component can increase due to various reasons like pornography.Pornography can make you think like sex is something really awesome ,whereas it happens like that way in porn world only not in real life. Sex is not like that as fantasised in pornography(You can search from some reliable sources about how pornographic sex is entirely different from sex in real life).Due to this a person highly fantasises about sex which INCREASES his/her sex drive.So when he finally sleeps with his/her partner after marriage he/she realises that all that pornography was illusion.
    Third thing is that sexual energy is different from other drives like food etc.If you don't eat food you will die while as this is not true with sexual energy.There are also ways to channelise it like through sexual transmutation.It means sexual energy can be compared with like a form of energy and can be transformed into other forms like imagination, creative works and other intellectual achievements.In this way your sexual desire will be reduced very much as I have done myself.You should study in detail about sexual transmutation (also called sexual sublimation)to understand fully what I am saying.In this you will convert your sexual energy into highly valued activities in the society.
    Fourth thing is that having great sexual desire is not something you should be too much worried.May be it will be same as other women have.But since women are taught from very childhood that a female who does not control her sexual desires are sluts this creates a lot of confusion in them.They sometimes start perceiving that she is the only one(or among the few females) who has a large desire while as this may be normal like with other females.But they don't discuss it because of taboo or thinking it as weird.Moreover more sexual drive is not something bad.It means more potential for creative and intellectual achievements (as I explained above how).Moreover males highly value more sex drive in girls as girls have in general less sexual drive compared to boys(you can search about this from some reliable sources) so this would add spice to their sexual pleasure provided you share with them about this.So if you share this with your husband he will be very much happy.
    Moreover you should keep distracted yourself with studies all the time, prevent exposure to erotic or sexually stimulating environment as much as you can as I myself is doing.Also set some goals that are very hard to achieve and keep busy in achieving them.Also having vaginal penetrative sex does not give pleasure to females so do not waste your time about thinking sex all the time.
    Fourth thing is about marriage age.Clearly you are still young.Marriage nowadays happen at late age this is especially more true about Medical students.So you should not feel desperate about your boyfriend at this age.They would have proposed you but at this age it is not common for marriage proposal (but clearly common to propose a girl for having sex and unfaithful relationships).And if they are in relationship it may for sexual needs and may not be committed for marriage.Moreover being in relationship does not either guarantee security of committed spouse.Even devorce rate is very high in western countries so just focus on your studies at least until four years in UG Medical school before thinking about marriage.I myself don't have any girlfriend as I don't want to be relationship until I complete my internship.Remember all the pleasure and contentment comes from real achievements and when a person becomes elder he/she highly regrets about having wasted all the time on unnecessarily pleasures like sex that do not add to their achievements.Indeed my sexual drive is very strong compared to yours but I just channelise it into useful works and I struggled very hard in order to have resonable control on it.You will see dear that with time and practice it will be easy to have control on your sexual desire and it will become your habit.And after having resonable control you will feel deep contentment and peace because you will feel like you have been freed from a great prison like I experienced.You will start spending time on real achievements and things that give peace and contentment of mind.But if you let it as such it will be difficult then to control this habit and will unnecessarily increase your anxiety, will reduce your self esteem,your achievements.If you want further help contact me at ******* as I don't have time to come here again. Medical students you know are busy with their studies

    • Please do NOT post your contact information in your comment. We do not allow it.

      Wael Editor

    • I( Aijaz Ahmad) don't mean to say that vaginal penetration give no pleasure at all to women but clitoris has central role in tactile sexual stimulation s.Also it should be noted that there are females who reach orgasm from penetrative sex alone(but majority in general don't reach orgasm from penetration alone)

  29. It's understandable where you are coming from. It must be hard. Really hard. You live in a country where you see every other person dating and indulging in sexual activities quite easily while you have to resist your temptations. It is hard for sure. However, firstly I want congratulate you that you are doing a great job and you ll get immense reward for this patience.

    I want to talk about solutions, because these desires won't ever go away. But you need to learn to channel them in the right direction. And for that you need to define the perception in your mind as to what sex really means. For majority out there it is only an outlet of pleasure that everyone seeks without any boundaries or restriction, but for a muslim it means much more. It means that you excercise that pleasure inside a limitation. And trust me it is far more exciting, pleasurable and satisfactory.

    Also there is nothing wrong in feeling that desire to it's peak. However, you need to take it positively. You should socialize with people, be open to your likings, and at the same time understand that you have a limit that you will not exceed no matter what. And be proud of it.

    Secondly, you have all the right to propose someone you like. In a decent fashion. You can also tell your parents to maybe start approaching families and socialize with them.

    A good solution would be to do a nikkah with someone you like and build an understanding with. Maybe you can shift permanently with him later after your studies complete.

    Don't display yourself out for anyone out there. Be yourself. Look good and presentable. But also know who you are and what you beleive in. When you ll be yourself, you ll find the right person too.

    May Allah make it easy for you! DOn't worry, pray and soon you ll enjoy with someone who deserves you!

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