Am I divorced or still married?
Assalam O Alaikum,
I'm 32 with two children from a previous marriage. I got married to a friend of mine who told me he was divorced with one child. We didn't want to commit sin so we had a nikah. I have been with him for nearly two years. I recently found out that he is still married to his first wife and had a second child with her. He lied to me for 2 years. He doesn't financially support me at all.
When his wife found out about me, she told him to divorce me, he sent a letter stating he is divorcing me but later on said his intention wasn't in it and he only did what his first wife asked of him so he wouldn't lose his children. I'm very confused. Plz can u help me. He still says that we are married and swears that his intention wasn't in it and he didn't say it to my face but it was written in a letter. Does this mean I am divorced? Plz help me!!
Jazak Allah khair,
Skyes.
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If you don't like it get a divorce we don't have to be unhappy.. he just wanted sec and used nikah to get it and didn't care about your feelings of him having a wife so hr lied. Any thing that I am not told I would divorcenfor as I can take care of myself. He just wanted sex this is the problem with polygamy nowadays
assalamalaikum-
pl note the islamic way of divorce and the rules applied from quran and hadees.......
COMMANDENTS IN QURAN ON TALAQ.......
O PROPHET[SALALAHUALAIHIWASALAM]WHEN YOU DIVORCE YOUR WOMEN,DIVORCE THEM IN THEIR WAITING PERIOD,COMPUTE THE WAITING PERIOD ACCURATELY, DO NOT TURN THEM OUT OF THE HOUSES IN THEIR WAITING PERIOD,NOR SHOULD THEY GO AWAY FROM THE THEIR HOMES,UNLESS THEY HAVE COMMITTED ANY MANIFESTLY EVIL DEED,SUCH ARE THE BOUNDS SET BY ALLAH,ANY ONE TRANSGRESSES THESE BOUNDS SET BY ALLAH HE COMMITS WRONG AGAINST HIMSELF,YOU DO NOT KNOW MAY BE ALLAH WILL CAUSE SOMETHING TO HAPPEN TO PAVE THE WAY FOR RE-COINSELATION,IF YOU HAVE TO DIVORCE YOUR WIVES YOU SHOULD DIVORCE THEM TILL THE WAITING PERIOD.SURAH TALAQ-65 [AL-QURAN]
WHAT IS WAITING PERIOD-
THE SYSTEM OF SHARIAH TALAQ IS NOT TO BE GIVEN [IN MENSTRUAL PERIOD DAYS]BUT AFTER THE MENSTRUAL PERIOD BEFORE HAVING SEX....
1ST MONTH 1ST TALAQ……
2ND MONTH 2ND TALAQ …...
AND 3RD MONTH 3RD TALAQ TO BE GIVEN IN FRONT OF ARBITRATORS FROM BOTH FAMILIES,BY GIVING AWAY ALL THE JEWELS,CLOTHES ALL THAT WAS GIVEN BY THE GROOM AT THE TIME OF MARRIAGE AND GIFT HER AND RELEASE HER WITH GRACE AND KINDNESS…….
IF THE HUSBAND PROCLAIMS THE 3RD TALAQ [IN THE ABOVE SHARIAH MANNER ]THEN THE WOMAN WILL BECOME HARAM FOR HIM THIS IS CALLED TALAQ-E SHARIATH……
ALLAH REVEALED IN SURAH BAGARA-229]IF A TALAQ IS GIVEN TWO TIMES AS PER THE LAW &KEEPS HIS WIFE OR SENDS HER BACK TO HER PARENTS & IN THAT CASE IT WILL BE COUNTED AS 2[TWO]TALAQS-AND IF THEY DO NOT RESCUE THEIR RELATIONSHIP THEY CAN RE-MARRY AGAIN BEFORE ISSUING THE 3 RD TALAQ [SURAH BAQARA AYAT [NO232AFATER THE 3RD TALAQ- NO RE-MARRIAGE IS ALLOWED……
THE INTENTION OF THIS VERSE IS FURTHER EXPLAINED IN HADEES NASAI REPORTS HOLY PROPHET SALALAHUALAIHIWASALAM WAS INFORMED A PERSON HAD PRONOUNCED 3[THREE]DIVORCES IN ONE SITTING HE STOOD UP IN ANGER AND SAID"ARE THE PEOPLE PLAYING WITH THE BOOK OF ALLAH EVEN WHEN I AM PRESENT AMONG YOU"SEEING THE EXTREME
ANGER OF PROPHET SALALHU-ALAIHI-WASALAM A PERSON STOOD UP AND SAID SHOULD I GO AND KILL THAT PERSON.
THE COMMANDMENTS OF SHARIAH ARE FOLLOWED BY THE MUSLIMS MILLIONS OF GIRLS CAN BE SAVED FROM RETURNING BACK WITH CHILDREN. .
WHAT IS HALALA
HALALA MEANS THE DIVORCED WOMAN MARRIES ANOTHER MAN NATURALLY-AND CONSUMATES THE MARRIAGE WITH HIM...AND THEN HE EITHER DIES NATURALLY OR DIVORCES HER DUE TO NATURAL REASONS OR DISPUTE,SHE THEN BECOMES FREE TO MARRY HER FIRST HUSBAND[AFTER IDDA PERIOD 4 MONTHS & 10 DAYS]
HUSBAND ARRANGED BEFORE HAND TO GIVE HER TALAQ SO THAT THE WOMAN CAN RE-MARRY HER FIRST HUSBAND A CONDITIONAL MARRIAGE[ARRANGING A HUSBAND TO MARRY AND DIVORCE HER FOR RE-MARRIAGE IS HARAM IN ISLAM.
THE ABOVE DECLARETYPE OF MARRIAGE IS EXTREMELY DISLIKED IN SHARIAH.THIS ARRANGEMENT IS CONSIDERED ACCURSED IN HADEES ......[RADD-AL MUHTAR 2:540/ DARSE TIRMIDHI-VOL-3-PAGE 399.
THE MESSENGER OF ALLAH SALAHUALAHU-ALAIHIWASALAM SAID"ALLAH CURSES THE ONE WHO MARRIES TO MAKE A WOMAN HALAL FOR HER HUSBAND THE ONE WHOM THIS IS DONE FOR [BOTH]AHMAD,NASAI,TIRMIDHI]THIS COURSE OF ACTION IS SEVERELY PROHIBITED....
..........................................................................................................................................
POSITION OF KHULLAH IN ISLAM.......
WHAT IS KHULA?
IF A WOMAN DOES NOT LIKE HER HUSBAND OR THINKTHAY CANNOT LIVE IN HARMONY,SHE HAS THE RIGHT TO GET SEPERATED[KHULLAH]BY PAYING BACK HER MEHER & GIFTS GIVEN TO HER AND GET HERSELF FREE FROM THE BOND OF MARRIAG.IT IT IS BETTER THAT WHATEVER THE HUSBAND HAS GIVEN TO HER HE SHOULD NOT TAKE BACK MORE THAN THAT ALLAH HAS SAID THAT IF YOU CANNOT LIVE IN HARMONY,BETTER YOU SHOULD GET SEPARATED BY TAKING BACK THAT YOU HAVE GIVEN TO YOUR WIFE[AL-BAQARA-229]
WIFE OF SABIT BIN KHAIS CAME TO THE PROPHET[PBUH]AND SAID YA RASOOL ALLAH I FIND NO FAULT IN CHARACTER AND BEHAVIOUR OF MY HUSBAND,BUT I DONT LIKE HIM THEN THE PROPHET[PBUH]ASKED HER THAT WHAT SABITH HAS GIVEN TO YOU?
SHE SAID A GARDEN THEN THE PROPHET ASKED ARE YOU WILLING TO RETURN THE GARDEN SHE SAID "YES
A WIFE SHOULD NOT TAKE DECISION ALONE AND ASK HER HUSBAND FOR TALAQ SUCH AN ACT IS HARAM.EVEN THOUGH HER HUSBAND HAS GIVEN HER ALL THE FECILITIES AND DID NOT HARRAS HER ,THEN THE QUESTION OF SEPERATION SHOULD NOT ARISE[SUNNAH ABU DAWOOD 2226]
IN SUCH CASES THE WIFE DEMANDS TALAQ FROM HER HUSBAND THOUGHT HUSBAND HAS NIT HARASSED HER,ON THAT CASE THE PERFUME OF HEAVEN IS HARAM FOR THE WIFE....
Assalamualaikum,
The Ulama agree that divorce on paper is valid. But if the intention was not to divorce, it wouldn't count as such. There are fataawa of Shaikh bin Baaz and Shaikh Muhammad bin Ibraheem with this meaning.
I supposr your husband was determined to divorce you when he signed the letter. This would perhaps count as one divorce. If you intend to get back to him in the Iddah period, you can do so. Otherwise you may have to do the Nikah again.
Still, if you consult a qualified scholar about this, it will be better.
Abu Abdul Bari
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
assalamalaikum-
i repeat this as the supreme verdict from quran and the paper written or not written is immaterial.....
WHAT IS WAITING PERIOD-
THE SYSTEM OF SHARIAH TALAQ IS NOT TO BE GIVEN [IN MENSTRUAL PERIOD DAYS]BUT AFTER THE MENSTRUAL PERIOD BEFORE HAVING SEX....
1ST MONTH 1ST TALAQ……
2ND MONTH 2ND TALAQ …...
AND 3RD MONTH 3RD TALAQ TO BE GIVEN IN FRONT OF ARBITRATORS FROM BOTH FAMILIES,BY GIVING AWAY ALL THE JEWELS,CLOTHES ALL THAT WAS GIVEN BY THE GROOM AT THE TIME OF MARRIAGE AND GIFT HER AND RELEASE HER WITH GRACE AND KINDNESS…….
Assalamu alaikum. He said it wasn't intentional. Nothing on earth is vaalid without intention.Allah sees and considers what your heart utters, not mere words uttered unintentionally. My dear sister, it appear that your marriage is perfect to me but u need to talk to him over the control and discipline of his other lady.
My husband and i were having an arguement when he said i wil divorce you(i think he said that...im not sure...neither is he).does that mean im divorced?later he said he was angry he didnt mean it.
No you're not divorced. Next time try avoiding fights and instead compromise.
If he can not support you or maintain you as is mentioned in the Quran, then he shouldn't of married and as he is not fullfilling your rights you should seek Khula. Allah says in the Quran marry 2,3,4 if you are able to deal fairly and be just with them otherwise only marry one!
what if my husbanstill divorce me never say 3 talaq is that valid
we didnt took our divorce paper coz no witness shall i take t back and say he divorce me coz of his dreams going to america and all is lies that he never say 3 talag to me never in sharia can i take it bck the divoce since paper havent release yet