Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I want to get married to my boyfriend

bride want to be, when will he marry me, want to marry. I love my boyfriend a lot, and he does the same. He has proposed to me for marriage. His parents accepted it. They talked to me also, they like me a lot. My mom hates my boyfriend a lot just because he is from Kerala and I am from Hyderabad, and we have age differences. He cares a lot about it. Anyway, my family accepted my marriage, but only on one condition: that he gets a good job. I daily pray for our marriage.We want to make this relationship legal by getting married. We both are Muslims (sunni) and well educated, but my mom always makes dua for our breakup and that I never get married to him. He is very good with me, understands me and makes me speak to his parents. Will my mom dua succeed if she prays for our breakup? I don't wanna marry another boy because I love him, and I would always have guilt for marrying another boy. He is very faithful to me and cares a lot. He is finding a job just because my parents accepted only on that, even though his dad owns a business. Please tell me how to make this marriage successful, and will my mom's dua be accepted? -Asina Tahseen

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9 Responses »

  1. if your marrige will brake up be sure it is not because of your moms dua
    Because Allah says "humans sometimes dua for bad things while thinking they want a good thing" (and I don't care them (as far as I understood from the ayah)
    therefore if you mom dua for your break up just because of illiteracy. Don't care because as far as we see Allah don't care it too...

  2. salamm sister, I wish u'll get him as ur hus , if he is gud for u, dat Allah (saw) knows it.. so pray to Allah (saw). I am from kerala too.. language will b the one problem u may face in future.. and wats the age difference between u and him?? age is not a big deal anyway.. I am asking for the curiosity!!

  3. You should marry him REGARDLESS stand up for yourself. Sounds like you got a very good man. These days its very hard to find a good Muslim man. Ignore what your mum is doing she will have to answer to Allah at the end like anyone else who does wrong by others. The other thing i want to say is that if you really want to marry this person then you must not delay the marriage, marry as soon as you can.

  4. Salaams,

    You said your family will accept the marriage on the condition that he gets a good job. That's reasonable. Why not just move toward that goal, and in the meantime ignore your mother's "bad duas"? If she is just doing that to be dramatic, but otherwise accepts the marriage, then it's really not worth paying attention to anyway. Ultimately she doesn't have the power to make anything happen- that is only with Allah.

    If, on the other hand, her reasons for being against the marriage are of substance- meaning she is worried about his ability to care for you or she sees flaws in his character that you may be choosing to ignore- you may be better to hold off on the marriage and give it more time to secure that he is in fact a good match for you. And if it turns out he's not- rest assured you will eventually get over him and fall in love again.

    -Amy Editor

    • Hi my name Is Paige I'm a white English girl I been in a relationship for over 2 years with my musilm boyfriend who I adore I've leanrt the kalma and now he says he can marry me my heads abit crushed cause I dnt knw wat to believe he says I'm his soul mate and I believe tht we are I just want us to be happy I ask Allah for happyness for us both

      • Page, you've known him for two years, which is plenty of time, and you say you adore him. If you have also decided to become Muslim, then I see no barriers to prevent the two of you from marrying.

        Wael Editor

  5. Am sorry to say...yur mum can't nt replce __::_ALLAH. BE STRONG ND PRAY HE IS OMIPOTENT

  6. salam my dear brothers and sisters may allah taala accept your duas and solve problems aameen. am also in such a problem i am a new muslim and my family is hindu and whom i love is a muslim man i accepted muslim relegion because i like it but no one knows it only my boyfriend knows we love each other truely but because of religion problem his parents are not accepting me and not mine also please duafor us that me and my boyfriend marry sson as possible please guyz .....

  7. For sure dear.... May Allah ta'ala bless u both nd accept Ur relationship.....
    Actually m a Muslim girl nd m also in a prob.... I love my bf who is also a muslim , belongs to gud caste, belongs from a gud family, love me alot, care for meeh, he can do anything for meeh.... He drop his education opportunity jst for meeh otherwise he can go abroad nd do his further studies..... Bt my parents r very much curious.. they want me to marry by I love him only.... I don't want to marry to any other person he is my darling , he is my love , I can't even think about it that I'll marry to other person nd my Jaan will be alone..... Nooo.... Never....
    The prob. Is this that he is still jobless he tried a lot he continuously make efforts... he continuously keep on trying.... Now he wants to go abroad for the job.... Bt it's not that easy wat we think..... My parents are keep looking for the man.... Nd I can't tell them that I want to marry to my bf.... Cause once I told them then things will become more nd more problematic for meeh as well as for my bf..... I just want that he found the job nd then I'll tell everything to my parents about us...... Jst pray for us , we both need it as dua is the strongest nd effective step for everyone.....

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