I’ll die without him…
Hi I'm 17 and I met a guy online, he's a muslim also. I live in the UK and he lives in the UK but in a different city.. And I love this guy so badly and he's also serious about me and he told his parents about me and they don't mind. But my parents might just freak out a bit?
But I don't know yet because I haven't told my dad about him and my mum. For I'll just pray and wait for a year or two and tell them but if I do I don't know how to convince them. I'm just so eager. Ughhh ....
Oh oh yes and just to let you know my boyfriend is 19 and I'm 17 but age is just a number.. And I video call him everyday and stuff. He's my heart. But I don't know what to say to my parents. I mean I've been dating him 3 months and I will meet him. But he's defo not like other guys I know that .... So anyone can you please help me I'll die without him...
Ok ok many thanks xx
taslima
9 Responses »
Leave a Response
Entries(RSS)
Salam you are wasting your time.When young girl innocent clean pure soul virgin gets exposed to HARAM especially opposite sex .It really affects your heart which in turn effect your thoughts because as unexperienced and innocent you are .You are not smart and lack knowledge and guidance to save yourself from evil and curses.When a muslims starts to do major sins he is cursing and cursing himself.That why the scholars say we must be in environment of Deen .we must keep to pious company.Or else you will never succeed even if you were the queen of U.K because success ois only Obeying the commandments of Allah and teachings of prophet Muhammad.Now for the male individual that you are associating .It is best you completely leave.Why ? Because you are two young .the stats of people getting married very young do not last very long.2yrs .the most if anything beyond that will be a love fight fight relationship and it will be a bad ending.Only speak through facts and because of my 40yrs of experience and deep insight in Islam and married to a scholor who studied in Lancaster. U.K My sister love in Islam does not work like this.This is the way of the kaffir .It SHAITAN who is whispering and playing the whole situation out.We don't know this person 100%.we don't know what other people he's been with.We don't know if he has a criminal record .We can go on and on.The point is its just words.The insight is this any person who meets people online or at public places any were who doesn't obey Allah's commandments can NEVER BE GUIDED! THIS IS A FACT.THIS PERSON ONLY WANTS TO GET THE ONE CHANCE TO MEET YOU AND SLEEP WITH YOU AND THAT WILL BE THE END. OH AND HE WILL SAY I LOVE YOU BECAUSE ALL MAN WHO DO NOT GO TO MOSQUE AND PRAY ONLY THINK SEX SEX.AS A SURVEY SAYS THAT MEN THINK OF SEX EVERY 1MIN OR LESS.SO MY ADVICE IS DISCONNECT BUILD YOUR IMAN TO GIVE YOU PEACE TRANQUILITY LOVE CONCERN ABOUT THE PEOPLE WHO ARE FAR AWAY FROM DEEN.AT THE SAME TIME HAVE A CAREER SO YOU CAN BE INDEPENDENT AND TRAVEL WITH YOUR WEALTH.HELP PEOPLE WHO ARE POOR AND REPRESENT ISLAM THE WAY IT SHOULD BE.OTHERWISE YOU ARE WASTING YOUR LIFE AND TIME.PLEASE TAKE THE TIME TO LOOK AT OTHER RELATIONS AND COMPARE AND RESEARCH YOU WILL FIND ITS A SAD WORLD OUT THERE.MARRIAGE IN YOUR CASE SHOULD BE WHEN YOU COMPLETED A DEGREE IN SOME FIELD AND BUILD YOUR FOUNDATION IN ISLAM THEN LOOK FOR A 100% PRACTICING MUSLIM WITH GOOD EDUCATION.WHEN WE GO TO LOOK FOR A PERSON WE SHOULD RELY ON ALLAH 100%.WHEN A PERSON DOES CROSS YOUR PATH.THEN IF WE ARE INTERESTED WE ASK QUESTIONS LIKES DISLIKES OUTLOOK ON LIFE ETC..WE JUST DON'T SEE THE FIRST GUY AND SAY I'M IN LOVE.NOOO THAT IS WRONG.I ONLY SEEN MY WIFE 3 TIMES ALTHOUGH I MET AT LEAST ABOUT 20 BEFORE WE BOTH AGREED TO GET NIKKA. I CAN TELL YOU THAT BEING MARRIED FOR 11YRS WE BECAME STRONGER IN EVERYWAY FROM LOVE TO RESPECT.MIND YOU LOVE GROWS AS RELATIONSHIP GROWS PROVIDED YOU ARE BOTH OBEYING ALLAH.FROM THIS WE LIVE HAPPY AND WHEN TESTS COME ABOUT WE DEAL WITH IT CAUTIOUSLY AND ask ALLAH HELP.Remember the way of the kuffar is totally wrong.Dating falling love and etc... there living a illusion it has no blessings or Barakah in it as you can see in the Hollywood stars they are mostly all screwed up!!!So please take the time to understand and control you harmones
Dear sister, u seems to be so excited about u r current relationship with that boy. Honestly speaking, 3 months is a very less time to know someone. However, if u r seriously interested in him, there is no other choice for u than talking to u r parents as soon as possible. U have to find a way to make this relationship halal. Urgent! Urgent! Urgent! Dear sister, pls understand the trick of shytan. Its an alarming situation. Delay can make u away from right path. Know the real dangor of current situation. May ALLAH bless u, u r family and that boy with so so much khair! Fe aman ALLAH
Assalamu alaykum,
First of all, stop acting ditsy. I'm 17 as well and there's no excuse for you to act so immature.
Second of all, why did you initiate a haram relationship? Muslimahs don't "date". You're in contact with a non-maharam - which you're not supposed to be. Don't bother continuing this relationship if you're not planning on marrying him soon. You're absolutely too young to marry right now, and it's illegal in the U.K to marry at 17.
I say cancel this relationship (stop conversation with him) and focus on your deen and studies.
Also, stop with this "I'm going to die without him" drama. It's absolutely atrocious of you to say. Allah (swt) didn't give you life just to "date" this man. Spend your life meaningfully and carefully because we don't know when Allah (swt) has decreed our end.
Dear Taslima ,
I will keep it short.
Even if he is not like the other guys, still please do not meet him.
You like this guy. You will "die" without him. You want to marry him. Then tell your parents immediately.
He has involved his family and so should you.
Your parents may say no or they may say yes with conditions attached that you must complete your education and then marry him but until then no contacts with this guy.
But,
If you are not brave enough to tell your parents then break this relationship with this guy immediately because in islam friendship with opposite gender is not allowed and boyfriend/girlfriend is definitely not allowed.
Please stop exchanging feelings and making promises with this guy because he is not your husband and you are not his wife, (you both are not Mahram/halal to each other).
Please stop leading yourself and this guy towards greater sin.
Best wishes,
Me
17 years is too young to understand. When you are 17 your thoughts and perception are not stable, your preferences and thoughts aren't permanent. Maybe after one year your thoughts about your life partner will change. 17 age have no experience of real life.
I would advice you to wait until you turn 21, i am sure if you talked to your mom and dad about it, they have been in your shoes and only want the best.
Sorry sister, but i have seen enough in my life to know right away that any story that begins with "I'm 17 and I met a guy online" does not end well for the girl.. Think of your safety first sister!
Assalam alaikum,
Dear Sister,
The both of you are young and maybe that is irrelevant to you--but it makes it that much more difficult for you to be taken seriously. If you and your bf want to be taken seriously, stop referring to yourselves as bf and gf. Stop communicating with him. If he is really serious about you, he would protect you by NOT talking to you further and ask his parents to approach your parents. It is that simple.
Also, if you are truly worried about how your parents will react to all of this, then stop doing these things behind their backs. And, you know don't know if this guy is like other guys or not--do you know all the other guys? We don't have knowledge of people's intentions--that is why his intentions, if good, should be backed with good actions. If he is secretly meeting with you, I would say that he doesn't respect you as much as you may think.
So stop communication with him. Focus on your studies. If and when he and his family approaches your parents, then you can have your say, but if he isn't willing to do that, the discussion is really over.
May Allah swt help you to find the best spouse, Ameen.
Oh to be young and Naive again, fall in love...fall out of it...i miss those days.
anyway back to the point.
Sister your hormones are all over the place, i hope you are good friends with you parents and older siblings who can help guide you and control your "feelings" of this guy being your "heart" lol
Not to sound condescending but when i was told that what i was doing was wrong and dating was haram...i would brush it off as people not knowing what they were talking about.
Sis please come to your senses... think of this guy as a passing fancy...just like how this guy thinks of you.
to think that he is committed to you is pure folly.
Either convert this relationship to marriage or walk away before the two of you give in to your feelings and commit sins you would admonish others of.
hope that helps...
Asalamalaikum sister,
I understand being in the exact same position as you when i was 18. i thought he was different from other guys, he is not the same.
and its really hard to think from your head and people tell you to stay away from him are the people that frustrate you the most.
I understand love completely, but you need to realise that what you maybe doing is going to effect your akhira so please think before you drag this relationship further with out marriage.
even if he was this amazing guy, you seem smart enough to know what is right and wrong. Allah comes first and with out Allahs blessing your relationship with this guy will never be successful.
What I'm trying to say is if you do it the right way you would have no regrets and nothing will go wrong for you Inshallah.
TELL YOUR PARENTS!
please don't do what i did at your age and get your heart broken.
your parents might seem a little bit scary about boys but they do know they have given birth to a human and they are definitely aware that you will be married one day. you have nothing to loose!
But you will loose a lot by keeping this a secret any longer.
Kind regards
Sister