Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I love him but I fear ALLAH


Assalam o alikum ,

I am a muslim girl ... but now I think I don't deserve to call myself Muslim.
I live in KSA, I have done uncountable UMRAH Alhamdulilah .. but for study issues I'm in pakistan. I love a boy and he loves me more .. but after reading your blogs I said to him that we will not talk to each other any more. One thing more we have met many times. Now I have fear of ALLAH. I love him and I want to marry him but after completing my studies I told him we will never meet again and we will not talk to each other not on call and messages, beside this I also want to marry him with Razamandi of ALLAH and my parents I don't want to anger ALLAH. Please tell me what to do.
PS I pray to ALLAH if he is not my destiny then take away his love from my heart and his too.
Please help me.

bint e mateen

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3 Responses »

  1. Dear Sister

    The solution of your problem is very simple. Ask him that if he wishes to continue the relation-ship with you then he must send a proposal for you. Even if he needs time to complete his study and job then a long term engagement is still possible provided you guys remain sincere and true to each other with courage.

    Advice him to present proposal with absolute confidence and a well mannered behavior. Even if he gets initially rejected due to lack of job(strong possibility), then he should not get angry or loose heart on the spot, but advice him to display a calm and patient behavior in front of your parents for that possibility too.

    If he is not interested in sending the proposal then it will remain a play boy love and not capable of being transformed into a mature and true love at this point.

    Keep updating your status so that we may provide helpful advice on each step.

  2. Tell him to meet your parents. Go from there and see what happens.

    It's not a problem to like someone, it's great..just find a way for him to meet them and get to see that he is also a great guy.

    Make dua, pray iistikhara and just be honest with your parents. It's better than being secretive, that's the more halal way.

    All the best my dear and hope everything goes well.

  3. Dear sister,
    You fell in love with this guy and after meetings, calls and messaging you realise you are doing a sin.
    Firstly what if he is hurt , he could'nt sleep just because you stopped talking. You came into his life , loved him at your will and now you are not sure he is good for you or not.
    I appreciate and I'm happy that you fear Allah but I would request you to stay in touch via calls and messages just because he may go through a mental trauma, depression, anxiety and anger if you stop talking to him. Give him some time to adapt this thing and ask him first if he is ready or not. You might spoil your relation with him.
    Most couples fight just because one of them do not reply to their calls and don't answer at the correct time.
    So please discuss this with him first.
    May Allah grant you both what you deserve.
    Taqwah is good but here situation might complicate so please ask him first before taking any decision.

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