Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Negative Istikhaara For Marriage.

English Translation of the Dua for Istikhaarah

Dua for Istikhaarah

Dear brothers & sisters,

A girl, I met her 4 years ago, we fell in love and planned to get marry, since I was only a student and not established we waited for few years till I get establish and start some good earning to send proposal to her family.

2 and half years ago when her proposal started coming more often, we had no option but to send our proposal to her family through her sister’s husband. In proper way, we sent our proposal, and her mother rejected me due to some “MOTHER TONGUE & LIVING CULTURE” issue, her sister has to tell her mother that we both like each other and willing to get marry. Our mother tongue and living culture is much higher than them.

After knowing about our interest to get marry with each other, her mother just ignored the situation and asked me to get established within 1 years to get marry with her daughter, I quiited the job, studies and Started business Alhumdulillah not in a year but within 2 years I got established by grace of ALLAH and then I started perusing her family for our marriage. Her family delayed the case of 6 months and checked my business, living standard in these days and found nothing special which may give a negative impression.

After all those thing, her family agreed to wed her daughter with me, meanwhile the girl I have been doing all this for has started acting abnormal, I felt like she thinks that she wouldn’t be happy with me or after getting marry I probably will not fulfill her dreams. In short she has been confused now.

The reason for her confusion which I believe was her family, as they investigate extra ordinary about me and probably they have made up their daughter mind negatively about me.

Her family had no option and agreed for our marriage with the condition that they will do istakhara.

In those 6 months I have been frustrated with her family attitude, which even started the arguments between me. I took suggestions with my best friends and all of them suggested me to step back from this “right away” because it will be big trouble for me in future.. I started setting up my mind and started ignoring her, meanwhile they did istakhaara and it was NEGATIVE.

1)      Girl I wanted to marry said, she saw that there was meat & Dahl was in dinner, and my family offered her MEAT to eat, which’s color is red and red is a sign of Negative.

2)      Also she saw some desert where a RED building stood. (sign of negative)

3)      They went to some consultant, and they gave my name to that consultant and that consultant directly said that “THE GIRL AND BOY NAME DOES NOT MATCH EITHER” – Negative.

But since we got apart, I’m uncomfortable and restless and she is too.


1)      Does this kind of sign counts?

2)      Istakhaara have concerns behind the story happening in families?

3)      If we get married, would ALLAH (s.a.w) be angry with us?

4)      My heart belief that I can manage her easily, still do I need to go for Istakhaara myself before decision?

5)      Isn’t it is positive sign that it is her behind my business achievements, which I started to get marry her asap.

6)      She is simply hopeless and helpless after the Istakhaara’s sign and she is stick and following the signs, she thinks that ALLAH has decided this for her, however her heart and mind says that she would happy with me after marriage instead of getting marry anyone else. – IS SHE ON RIGHT PATH?


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4 Responses »

  1. Assalaamualaikam

    Istikhara isn't based on numerology, dream interpretation, name-matching, bibliomancy, or any other shirk practices. It is a dua in which we ask Allah to guide us to what is best for us in this life and the next, and to protect us from things which would not be beneficial - the words of the dua itself explain this. We've had a lot of questions regarding misunderstandings about istikhara, so we've actually got a section on the website that has information about this - it might help you to read this.

    If the two of you wish guidance, then pray istikhara yourselves and trust in Allah to guide you both to what is best. Every Muslim can pray and ask Allah for guidance and protection; we do not need to go to fortune-tellers or people who claim to be able to use shirk practices to tell others what to do. As a general rule: if something isn't in the Quran and Sunnah, be very sceptical of it.

    Midnightmoon editor

  2. Salaams,

    Midnightmoon's response gives thorough guidance. I would just like to add that red is not a "negative" color, in dreams or otherwise. No color has a particular meaning, and all colors are created by Allah as a beautification of this world.

    -Amy Editor

  3. (Comment removed by Editor. Please note that Istikhara is not dependent on dreams or dream interpretation. If you need personalized advice, please log in and write your question as a separate post, and we will answer you in turn, Insha'Allah).

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