How do I repent?
"And others have confessed their faults, they have mingled a good deed and an evil one; (perhaps) Allah will turn to them (mercifully); surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful. Take alms out of their property, you would cleanse them and purify them thereby, and pray for them; surely your prayer is a relief to them; and Allah is Hearing, Knowing." Sura 9: 102 to 106
Assalaam Alaikum. I am a 22 year old girl who regrets all the sins I´ve done... I feel really horrible of what I have done. Me and my fiance really try to control ourselves but some times the shaitan comes between us..
My fiancé is a well behaved person and we both pray 5times a day and also recites quran ,.....
I had oral sex with my fiancé and after that what shall I do if I want to do namaz.
- dheena
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As salamu Alaykum, Sister dheena,
There are many comments about how to repent, this one that Sister Sara shared with us is specially deep, I would like to share it with you,
Repentance
“Say: “O ‘Ibaadi (My slaves) who have transgressed against themselves (by committing evil deeds and sins)! Despair not of the Mercy of Allaah, verily, Allaah forgives all sins. Truly, He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
And turn in repentance and in obedience with true Faith (Islamic Monotheism) to your Lord and submit to Him (in Islam) before the torment comes upon you, (and) then you will not be helped.
And follow the best of that which is sent down to you from your Lord (i.e. this Qur’aan, do what it orders you to do and keep away from what it forbids), before the torment comes on you suddenly while you perceive not!’”
[al-Zumar 39:53-54 – interpretation of the meaning]
The word tawbah (repentance) is a great word with deep meaning. It is not, as many people think, merely words to be uttered whilst persisting in sin. Think about what Allaah says:
“Seek the forgiveness of your Lord, and turn to Him in repentance”
[Hood 11:3 – interpretation of the meaning]
You will see that repentance is something more than seeking forgiveness.
Conditons of repentance
1 – Giving up the sin immediately.
2 – Regretting what has happened in the past.
3 – Resolving not to go back to it.
At the top of the page you have too a link on Tawbah, that may help you, insha´Allah.
May Allah(swt) guide all of us step by step in the straight Path, insha´Allah.
All my Unconditional Love, Respect and Support,
María
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Sister you need to separate yourself from your fiance right away. That's the only way this sinful behavior will stop. It is not allowed in Islam for the two of you to be alone together.
Remove yourself from him until you are ready to get married. Do not spend time with him. The only way to prevent the haram behavior from occurring again is to cut off the paths that lead to it.
Make tawbah for your past behavior. Keep up with your salat and reading Quran as you said.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Thank you, Wael.
María
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Salaam sister.
I agree with the excellent advice above (MashaAllah).
This is a grave sin. But you should not despair. Allah forgives if you are sincere in asking Him. You should repent and seperate yourself from your fiancee. I just wanted to add in answer to your question you should do ghusul to purify yourself in general after sexual contact. As far as I know the minimum is that hair and whole body must be washed (with or without soap). I have heard it is recommended to clean mouth and nose 3x with water and do wudhu afterwards, but I do not know a hadith to back the last sentence up with so please someone correct me if I am wrong.
Sara
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
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Would someone still be considered a virgin and can marry a chaste man if they once in the past engaged in oral sex and mutual masterbation but no sexual intercourse (penetration) took place? I believe that person would still be considered a virgin but will need to repent to purify themselves but wanted to confirm.
Penelope, as long as you have made sincere tawbah and stopped those actions, you can marry a chaste man.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor