I got secretly married to her and my mother is against love marriage
Love and Marriage
Assalamualaikum
I love a woman and she is nearly equivalent to me in all aspects only her family condition and education of her parents are little down stream compared to mine and she is also cousin to my another cousin's wife
We have our affair continued for 6 years and then we got married but we have kept it little secret. Her family has not any problem, problem is with my mother and other family members
On the 2nd year of our relation there were a little problem and we both refused to our family about our relation and on the third year this issue continued but this time she confessed to her family and i did not
now my family is strict not to getting me marry with her or allow her as my wife or to recognize our marriage with family processions
so i am looking for any islamic solution to my problem if anyone can help me then i shall be greatly helped
~ Rahman
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Salaams,
You said that you went ahead and married this woman, so in the eyes of Allah you are married. It doesn't matter if your family recognizes or respects it, or even "allows" it, because they don't have the final authority on such matters. Only the Almighty does.
It's a shame that your family will not be open minded and open hearted about your wife, but I don't suggest you let that get to you. You have a beautiful future in shaa Allah with your wife and perhaps the children she will bear you, so keep your focus on that. In shaa Allah in time your family will come around, but until then don't be ashamed and don't apologize for what you've done in good conscience.
If her family is supportive of you both, capitalize on that. Continue to show respect and care for your family, and in the end you can know you did the best you can, whether they decided to accept your marriage or not.
-Amy
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
ASSALAMALAIKUM-
YOUR MARRIAGE ACCEPTANCE COMES LATER FIRST OF ALL IT IS NOT VALID-WHERE R YOU- WITH THIS HIDE AND SEEK YOU THINK YOU ARE MARRIED TO THAT GIRL FOR 6 YEARS SORRY-
On the 2nd year of our relation there were a little problem and we both refused to our family about our relation............
It was narrated that Abu Moosa said: The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“There is no marriage without a guardian.”
It was narrated that ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: Any woman who gets married without the permission of her guardian,HER MARRIAGE IS INVALID-
(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1101; Abu Dawood, 2085; Ibn Maajah, 1881. Classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) in Saheeh al-Tirmidhi, 1/318)
It was narrated that ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: Any woman who gets married without the permission of her guardian, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid, her marriage is invalid. But if the marriage is consummated then the mahr is hers because she has allowed him to be intimate with her. If they dispute, then the ruler is the guardian of the one who has no guardian.”
(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1102; Abu Dawood, 2083; Ibn Maajah, 1879. Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Irwa’ al-Ghaleel, 1840)
Regarding proposing to a woman with kufaar parents, or a wali that's a kufaar:
http://islamqa.com/en/ref/389/wali
Brother/Sister,whoever wil be reading this message.I have a major problem going on my life.
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Rahman, as-salamu alaykum,
We are not scholars, but the Shari'ah would seem to indicate that your marriage is invalid, since you married her secretly, without the presence of her wali. Allah knows best.
My suggestion is that you re-marry her properly, with her wali present, and witnesses as required by Islam. You should so this even if your family does not agree. You have lived with her for years and considered each other husband and wife, and your family should come to terms with this and accept it, Insha'Allah.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor