A scary wedding dream; Dua to marry a married man.
My sister had it about 8-9 am this morning..
Basically, she dreamt that it was her wedding day, (she is unmarried) and was dressed in a red lengha (Asian dress). The dress was unusual as it was plain and not embroidered which is how wedding dresses normally are.
She was sitting with me and surrounded by ladies, some unknown to her and some who dislike her. One came and told her that she and I looked horrible. She looked at her skirt and realized it was inside out as she could see gold embroidery on the inside visible so she went to change it, and when she went to change it she realized it wasn't golden embroidery but holes in her trousers.
I checked the meaning myself and the interpretation was a bit.. well we'd like to get it double checked.
I hope you can help.. may Allah bless you and your family, ameen.
SECOND QUESTION
Can I make dua to marry someone who is not available?
I was engaged to a man for a some time . We were both very happy with this and could not wait to start married life. His parents had a falling out with mine, and took him abroad and forced him to marry someone else. (he was blackmailed with his cancer-stricken mother and beatings from his father).
I have not had any contact with him since other than a message of apology and that he wishes he was dead and was not happy at all. Is it acceptable for me to be praying that if it is in the best of everyone involved, he can still one day be with me? As I don't even know if he is happy with his marriage now or even if he has children (it has been 11 months), or if he or she are happy at this marriage but all I know is how I feel.
Is it ok to pray for his long life and happiness as he is no longer anything to do with me? Finally I am also praying that if it is best for me to live, then may Allah grant me sabr and endurance but if death is best for me then may Allah return me from where we came.
Is this ok to be praying for and is there any advice you can give me on how to stop feeling so awful all the time.
Jazakallah
Sparkles238
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Assalamualaikum,
Sister, regarding question 1, who did you check the meaning of the dream with? Was it a qualified 'Aalim? Because rarely do 'Ulama exist today, who interpret dreams. Though there are people who claim to have the knowledge of dream interpretation, but are no less than liars who just intend fame. So, beware. As far as your sister's dream is concerned, do not worry about it. Just trust in Allah and have your sister married to a righteous practicing Muslim.
Regarding the second question, what happened with you was a part of the Qadr Written by Allah. So, be patient about it. By your du'a, if you intend any harm, then know that any du'a is permissible, as long as it does not involve a sin or involve asking Allah to break ties. This is not allowed. Yes you can ask Allah, that He fills the man's life with happiness.
Ask Allah that He gives you the perfect match, who would support you in Pleasing Allah. It does not have to be the same man who was engaged to you earlier.
You can ask for happiness for yourself, but asking for death is disliked.
Allah tests His slaves in order to increase them in levels, and He Knows Best. We are supposed to keep our trust in Him and have patience, so that He is Pleased with us.
If asking for death becomes a necessity, i.e. there is no way out, then all we are allowed is to say the du'a:
المهم احيني ما كانت الحياة خيرا لي و توفني اذا كانت الوفاة خيرا لي
Allahummahyini ma kanatil Hayatu Khairan li wa Tawaffani iza kanatil Wafaatu khairan li
O Allah, keep me alive, as long as life is good for me. And make me die, when death is good for me.
We have an example when one of our beloved classical scholars had to make such du'a due to what he faced. It was Imam Bukhari Rahimahullah.
Do not ask for death. Instead, ask Allah for the strength of patience and hope from Allah for the Best.
May He admit us to the Paradise, the highest level of it known as al Firdaus
Aameen
Wassalamualaikum
Muhammad Waseem
what I mean by "it does not have to be the man you were engaged to" is not a condition but that you can ask for a good person for you too.
Salaam
I had a book on dream I interpretations which I used to see if I could get a meaning however I couldn't find a meaning and I am not qualified at all and it scared me loads so I thought I'd ask. She is 15 so not marrying yet.
As for me I am not praying with any bad intentions even when this marriage was arranged I could have tried preventing it but told the boy he needed to remember his parents come first.
I guess I knew I had to say that it is the right thing to do and I have made a lot of mistakes in my life but I have always done what I know is right.
Its just I really really was so happy with this man and had really wanted to marry him. Allah knows how much this has cost me because every day since I have wept alone, especially in salat I can't control myself
I don't pray to marry someone else as you suggested because the idea is so wrong to me which I know is not normal. My own parents are saying if I don't agree to Marry who they choose they will force me too, and it seems to not bother me at all anymore.
I pray if it is in the best of everyone for us to one day be together again but if it is not possible then for Allah to give me sabr
The dua you mentioned is the one I am reading. This life is unbearable at times and I am trying my best to please my parents and everyone around me.
In a way this dua has helped me more than anything because I always think what if Allah answers this dua today and this has made me so much more considerate of others
I guess I am making dua because I wanted something but it didn't happen and praying makes me feel better and closer to Allah
But does dua actually change qadr?
Sorry for the melodrama I know others have worse problems.
sister, you are in a much better position than I thought.
Alhamdulillah, you have made the decision. Now trust in Allah. And why not marry someone else if he is Religious? If the man you were engaged to is not available, then you should move on with other alternative. This life is full of tests, and there is a Shaitaan who tries as hard as possible to make us fail in them. But he has no control over Allah's chosen ones. So, keep your trust in Allah and believe me, its not a bad idea to marry someone else if he would help you fight the fitan, fight Shaitaan. You were just engaged to be married to that man, right? Then what stops you from the idea of marrying someone else?
Regarding the question if du'a can change Qadr, there is a hadith that says if anything can change Qadr, it is Du'a. This hadith has been narrated by various Muhadditheen including Imam Ahmad bin Hanbal Rahimahullah.
I believe that Allah is The All Knowing, and that if Qadr will be changed, then he knows that it will be changed.
Just remember, higher the level of Iman, greater will be the test.
May Allah make us successful in this World and in the Hereafter.
Aameen
Wassalamualaikum
Muhammad Waseem
Salam sister ,
This site is very good and quite accurate. It is based on the dream interpretation from ibn sirin
http://www.myislamicdream.com
And usually true dream come right before the time of fajr so don't panic as this might just be a scary dream and if not , if it is a warning then Allah can change anything with duaa
Maa salam
Asalaama alikum,
Just to add: when we have nightmares, it is Islamically suggested to give charity.
Jazakallah brothers.. I was only engaged to this boy but have known him since childhood and then when we were engaged I began talking to him a lot (in the presence of others), we had been engaged 2 years and we were just waiting for me to get my degree.
I really truly love him and when he was taken abroad was the worst day of my life and although I had no right to grieve I have been because I wanted this so much.. I wish I didn't have such strong feelings as I could be happy now.
Your words make a lot of sense brother praying for the perfect person may not be him but it will help me to live in a way that Allah wants. I do hope he is happy even if it isn't with me.
Thank you, all of your answer has helped. May Allah reward you abundantly for taking the time to help a stranger with their woes..
Sparkles238
Salaam sparkles.
I am sorry to hear what you have been through - may Allah (swt) make this trial easy for you. If you've known him from childhood then undoubtedly it will be hard - its no wonder you are struggling to move on.
"I wish I didn't have such strong feelings as I could be happy now."
But each day does get easier and even if he always has a special place in your heart it doesn't mean you will never move on and never consider someone else. It can and does happen and it is not disloyalty to the first person. I know right now you will think I don't understand but time does heal a lot dear sister.
Keep praying to Allah (swt).You can also pray for this guys happiness but please don't forget to pray for your own as well. I know you are grieving for him but do look after yourself and trust in Allah - He knows whats best for you. As for praying to be with him - I am not sure about that. It is true that Islamically we can make a dua if it doesn't ask for harm to anyone. But I am of the opinion that making a dua to be with someone unavailable for a long time can be harmful to oneself - it keeps the wounds open.
Instead why not change the dua and ask Allah to heal you, give you happiness and give you whats best for you in a spouse. Even if your hearts not in it at first it will slowly begin to open your eyes to realise that you can and will love again InshaAllah.
I hope I am not scaring you off by telling you this too early.