Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I like a man for marriage but he doesn’t know me

How long will I have to wait?

How long will I have to wait?

I am in state of serious confusion.My family want me to be get married for around 4 years.Within this time i never could asked/pray  allah for any particularly person that i want to get married.Many time i asked "O Allah that is so good for me if i know a selected fellow that i want to marry and asked him as my husband from  you."

So many man goes.None of any of them of their family reject me.Some of them are religious from outside appearing as i can not read anyones heart.Since i try to living in a islamic lifestyle i always preferred and pray for a religious man who not only followed islam but also love Allah and Islam from heart.

My family getting so rushed as all of my friends get married and i m getting older.

" Now i find a man"Iqbal" whom i really  do like too much and he is religious too  as far i can realize from outside."I do not know does islam allow any kind of liking/falling on someone.I never ever could believe this could be happen with me.Because i never fell anything for any other man like this.

Now the issue is i could not make any contact with the man (Iqbal) i like.That is even impossible for me to contact with him(Iqbal by phone or paying visit or other way.I even do not not if a muslim girl like someone what should she do?My family forcing me to get married and i could not tell them that i like someone else.It will be a great trouble if i told my family i like a man (Iqbal) that who even do not know me or we don't have any business with each other before.

I can only informed my family if he want to marry me willingly.Which seems no possibility till now as he do not know me or i can not reach him or other reason etc.

In this stage as someone has staying in my heart if i married other man for whom I do not fell anything its seems I cheatting him or lying with the emotions or may I never ever could love him.

On the other side the man I like  Name: Iqbal,even i could not inform him that I want  to marry him.

I want to wait and pray but my family asking me frequently why you do not married the other man?

I know that is the best love the love make more the sake of Allah.

What should i do?Should I get married other man or waiting for the response of Allah.But if i wait till when?


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4 Responses »

  1. Assalaamualykum cherryikhfaa,

    I would keep praying to Allah and making dua that He eases this situation for you and that you are able to marry "Iqbal," as you don't realistically have any other option. While continuing to reach out to Allah, I would focus on other aspects of your, volunteering, friends, hobbies. It could be that this interest in him and the fact that nothing can immediately happen between you two is meant to make you stronger and achieving greatness in the rest of your life by putting your focus there.

    You don't have to marry anyone you don't want to. Maybe it will eventually become easier for you to tell your parents about "Iqbal," and they can reach out to him for you.

    I will make a dua for you,

    May Allah give you everything your heart desires.


  2. Leave that man alone pray for Allah to give you a righteous husband

  3. Salam

    The situation you're in is like American High School. You ask a friend to go talk to Iqbal and see if he's available and if he'd be willing to go for you knowing that you like him. If you have a brother, or a Wali or anyone, or even yourself, you could go and get answers. If you don't want that route and you know the shopkeeper where he visits you could ask that way. If you know any of Iqbal's sisters you could ask that way. There are numerous creative ways to find out more or just to tell him.

    Heck, you could even throw a stuffed animal at his head that says "I like you Iqbal!" and after he picks it up you could say it was an accident. The stuffed animal was meant for a different Iqbal and you didn't mean to throw it, unless he's interested in which case you did.

    In terms of Islam I don't see anything wrong with liking the guy. Prophet Moses (pbuh) was approached by women that liked him. They approached him with "my dad would like to thank you" and apparently the thanks involved hiring him and getting him married to one of them.

  4. hey, it already passed 7 years.

    how is your life going? did you get married?

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