Can I marry a muslim girl without parents knowledge?
SalamAlaikum,
I am well settled muslim guy but the girl is still studying & we want to get marrried so that when we meet we didn´t commit adultery. Can I marry her without our parents consent? is it possible..?
imran
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As salamu alaykum, brother Imran,
Consent and knowledge, those are different terms, they have to know and if they disagree due to unislamic reasons you are in the right to marry without their consent, but only due to this reason. Then, to make your marriage legitimate you have to tell your family and propose to her family. This is the straight way.
Dating and secret marriages are haram.
As far as meeting her goes, stop any contact until you propose her. Here you have some posts about this topic, I hope they help, insha´Allah.
http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/marry-without-permission-parents/
http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/can-we-marry-without-parents-consent/
http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/married-over-phone/
http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/marriage-without-telling-parents/
All my Unconditional Respect,
María
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Imran,
No, you cannot marry without her parents' knowledge and consent. Why should you want to marry secretly? Are you afraid they will not approve of you? Are you already married? What do you have to hide?
You say you want to marry her so that when you meet you do not commit adultery. But why should you meet her in the first place? You should not be having a private or intimate relationship with her at all.
Do things the right, Islamic way. Do not have any personal contact with this girl. If you want to marry her, go to her parents and discuss marriage with them. This is the open, Islamic way of doing things.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
salam my name is kamra,, can i get marry with ma gf wetot tellin her parant,, even if i tell them r she tell them they nt agree ,, so it s possible to get marry we tot tellin them,, s it hallal in islam, coz xample ma paran r agree n if gril sid disaggree, so wa can i do kamran
kamran, you cannot get married secretly. A woman needs a wali for her marriage to be accepted. If you need more advice, please log in and write your question as a separate post, thank you.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Br. Kamran
Marriage is a celebration of a beautiful union of two beings. Keeping it a secret is not right, nor respectful for either the man or woman involved. If it is being kept a secret, then "something" is not right. If parents have no valid Islamic reason from preventing the marriage, and you 2 are adults, marry, and show them how happy you are so that their fears can be laid to rest and in time they will come around. Most times, parents are not that unreasonable.
My older brother fought with the entire family and even threatened suicide to marry the girl he loved and my parents caved in - he was so miserable after 2 years, but by then he already had 1 kid, that he stuck in the unhappy marriage - he now has 3 sons and she has left him. She does not want a divorce (and the sons threaten him taht if he divorces the mom they will never talk with him) and does not allow him to re-marry - she just does not want to live with him and give him his rights as a husband and is living in the US for the past 4 years with her sons who are in college while he lives in Pakistan raising the youngest....so you lose barakah by going against parents - they are not always the enemies most couples in ,love think them to be - they have life experiences and can see farther ahead than you.
I have shared my family secret so you can see how one family is affected by not listening to loving parents' advice. Work with them, understand their thought process and then do what is right.
All the best
I am a divorcee, but now I would like to get married to my own choice, I have been in a relationship for nearly 7 years, my parents are not happy and don't like the man I want to marry, I just want to know is it haram if I married him without the permission of my parents? I did ask a few people and I got told that bcos this iz my second marriage I am allowed to get married without my parents permission if they do not agree is this true?
Nosheen, please log in and write your question as a separate post, and give us more details about the situation (nature of your relationship, reasons for your parents' objections, character of the man, etc).
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Hiii i hav a question i married a muslim girl who is eldrr to me without the knowledge of my family because they are against me amrryin a lady elder to me ...n now shes pregnant but they still dont know anything....what should i do???
Nizar,
What can you do? Stop keeping secrets for a start. Tell your family.
A Muslim woman is not permitted to marry a non Muslim man. So you may also want to give this some thought.
SisterZ
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
No u dont understand we both are muslims but the problem is my parents are not the religious type and they think she being elder to me is a problem so i dont know wat to do if i tell dem they may break the relationship pkus they keep threatening me
Assalaamualaikam
Premarital relationships are prohibited in Islam, for good reason. If you are now expecting a child together, you should try to fulfil your responsibilities to them both and take steps to make your relationship legitimate.
If you require detailed advice, please submit a question and it will be answered in turn inshaAllah.
Midnughtmoon
IslamicAnswers.com editor
I have dating a guy for 2,3 years but I always try not to get physical at all. I have also been trying to get married. My parents agreed. His parents agreed. But my elder sister she didn't agree on our marriage before her. I wanted to break up but then I did a few research that if you parents don't have valid reasons then you can marry without wali. My mom used to always tell me that get married secretly it's gonna be ok. My dad used to tell me to get court marriage.then I did get married without informing my parents. Then after few months I told my parents they were hurt but not angry at all and they accepted it. They were actually fine about the marriage they just told me we would help you if you told us. My sister was so depressed I didbt wanna burden my parents more with worries and they seem fine with the secret marriage. But recently I heard marriage without wali is invalid .. What should I do?
"random", you should re-do your nikah with your father present. If you need further advice, please log in and write your question as a separate post, thank you.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
If both my parents agreed on the marriage and my mom told me to do secret nikkah then why should I do nikkah again. My parents agreed but told me to wait until my sister gets married because or else it might harm our social status. As far as I know if you are parents don't have a good Islamic reason then they have no roles as parents. And I did the nikkah coz my parents liked the guy and did want me to get married abd my mom used to tell me to get married so why would I do another nikah?
Don't ask questions that you don't want the answers to, and don't make excuses. You already know that the presence of a wali is required. Your father is living and he is your wali. Without him it is questionable whether your nikah was valid. Therefore you should do it again, with him present.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Hi assalamaykum
We are both muslim and planing to get married this coming month his family agree already.all i know my both parents is agree also but only my mother agree and my father disagree to got married.when the time i tell to my father that we plan to got married he doesnt like to talk to me anymore.can we marry without the consent of my father.thanks
Salaams,
It's unclear why your father is not agreeing. You cannot marry without your wali's consent. However, if he refuses to consent for non-Islamic reasons, you can find another person to stand in as your wali in shaa Allah. If you want to write in a separate post with more details about your sitauation, we can give you a more meaningful answer in shaa Allah.
-Amy
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Assalamo alaikum,I want to marry a Muslim boy and he also want to marry me,but his parents is not agree because I am not belong from his community i.e Sayyad ,now can we marry without our parents consent in this situation.
You cannot marry without your wali (i.e. your father or family representative). The boy does not need his parents' permission, however, so if your wali is willing and you meet the other conditions of nikah, you can marry anyway. By the way, these caste concepts (such as Sayyid with Sayyid) are not a part of Islam. Furthermore, most of those who claim to be Sayyid are not, so the whole thing is nonsense.
Wael
IslammicAnswers.com Editor
I was engaged to a guy and later family found out he had bad background. My parents said no for marriage, but now i an emotionally attached to the guy and his past has nothing to do with our present and future. My family is good respectful family and for them such background is not acceptable. I tried to convince them it didn't work out, can i still marry him without parents consent?
No, you cannot. Has the boy spoken to your parents himself? If not, let him do so. Perhaps he can make a connection with them. Or maybe he can demonstrate his sincerity by offering something valuable as mahr.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor
Please I am a man who want to marry without my family knowledge. but I will inform the girls family. Is it possible in Islam
idrisu, It is allowable but not advisable for the sake of family relations, obviously.
Wael
IslamicAnswers.com Editor