Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I feel terrible… but why can’t I cry?

There is a solution to every problem

As salamu alaykum

Dear all

I need help don't know how to deal it plz I need your wise advices.

Let me start my story from beginning.

I came another country for work and fall in low with Arabic man, after dating 1 year we decided to marry.  But I will be honestly he was not rich and has a lot family issues that time but he show me how much he loves me and I didn't care about anything. May be coz was so lonely and needed somebody's shoulder.

Anyway our marriage was without party and that kind of stuff only in court. But I accepted and he promised one day Inshaalah we will make party. But when we started live together beginning was so smooth all was ok after time he started change and give less attention to me. May be was my fault I don't know. But we always keep trying solve our problems.

He even rise to me hand twice and after beg me to not leave him and I forgive him he did a lot of bad things for me but always I forgives him.

But last time was enough I don't know how but I lost my temper also and slap his face and o felt awful and I start ask him sorry but he said hates me and don't love me any more tell me taalaq may be some 10 times even said I'm not woman, I'm man. He didn't come back home and text me that will take his clothes soon. I beg him ask sorry apologise million times and I asked him to not leave me but he don't want listen even.

I know I have done most awful thing in the world. But I don't know why I can't cry may be my heart understand that need let go I don't know what to do now.

Plz give me advice.

Mida

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4 Responses »

  1. I think. Stop begging and wait. Just give him time alone and when he is ready then he will find you.

    Are you Muslim? I'm not sure why you aren't crying, some people just don't cry in situations like these.

  2. OP: He even rise to me hand twice and after beg me to not leave him and I forgive him he did a lot of bad things for me but always I forgives him.......But last time was enough I don't know how but I lost my temper also and slap his face and o felt awful and I start ask him sorry but he said hates me and don't love me any more tell me taalaq may be some 10 times

    Both of you have a temper problem. What country your both are from?

  3. Asalam o alaikum sister,

    You are not crying because yes you know you have to let go. He raised hand and said sorry, you forgave him. You forgave him so many times. So, when you did a mistake why can't he forgive you?

    That anger was the frustration of everything you have been through. You said sorry, apologized so now give him some time some space. He'll realize, trust ALLAH.
    Leave everything to ALLAH. Have strong faith and don't lose patience.

    Trust ALLAH and keep your faith strong. ALLAH said "God does not intend to burden you, but He intends to purify you, and to complete His blessing upon you, that you may be thankful." (Surah Al Ma'idah)

    "So remember Me, and I will remember you. And thank Me, and do not be ungrateful.
    O you who believe! Seek help through patience and prayers. God is with the steadfast." (Surah Al Baqarah)

    "We will certainly test you with some fear and hunger, and some loss of possessions and lives and crops. But give good news to the steadfast. Those who, when a calamity afflicts them, say, "To God we belong, and to Him we will return." Upon these are blessings and mercy from their Lord. These are the guided ones." (Surah Al Baqarah)

    I heard these verses are very powerful for the ones who are in trouble. So, recite them day and night:
    1. Sura Ala Imran (Sura No.3) Verse. No. 26&27
    2. Sura A Nur (Sura No.24) Verse. No. 35
    3. Sura Al Fath (Sura No.48) Verse. No. 29
    4. Sura Al Hashr (Sura No.59) Last Four Verses

    Sa’d ibn Waqas reported that the Prophet, peace be upon him, said, “The supplication made by the Companion of the Fish (Prophet Yunus) in the belly of the fish was, ‘La ilaha illa anta, subhanaka, inni kuntu minadh-dhalimin (there is no god but You, You are far exalted and above all weaknesses, and I was indeed the wrongdoer)’. If any Muslim supplicates in these words, his supplication will be accepted.”
    In another report we read, “I know words that will cause Allah to remove one’s distress. These are the words (of supplication) of my brother Yunus, peace be upon him.”
    Source: Tirmidhi

    Or recite duas from http://www.zawaj.com/askbilqis/dua-in-islam/dua-for-anxiety-and-stress-2/

    Pray for everyone. INSHAA ALLAH, ALLAH will help you. Leave him for sometime and trust ALLAH. Don't go after him and stop saying sorry. Don't lose your self-esteem. Tell your problems and sorry to ALLAH now instead of him.

    Stay Blessed and be happy.

  4. I'm not a scholar but if he has given you Talak that many times surely yous are now divorced anyway.

    Speak to an Imam to clarify.

    May Allah make it easy on you ... Ameen.

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