Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I said a bad dua for my brother…now what?

Bossy girl


Few months ago, I had an argument and fight with my brother. He even hit me badly. I said "Inna Lillah" to him with anger and give loads of bad dua. The very next day I apologized to Allah and did good dua for him.

But just because of that fight, all my family boycotted with me. Even my mother who had witnessed that. He started that thing first and I was right but she said "Why you gave him bad dua and said 'inna lillah'?" I didn’t talk to anyone after that but yesterday my older sister tried to convince my mom but she called me and give a lot of bad dua to me.

I wasn’t wrong. He abused to my father when he is not even alive... how could I stop myself on that? My mom give so many bad dua to me yesterday and she said so many wrong things which never happened. So in short, that's a blame game starting, but I quit and left my matter on Allah.

Now tell me what should I do? I am guilty in that I gave bad dua to them and also my mom is on the wrong side because she cursed me for no reason. Please help me... I couldn’t sleep for the whole night.



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2 Responses »

  1. Assalaamualaykum Aisha,

    Your guilt regarding this matter is Allah's way of showing you that this was not the best way of handling your situation, and to help you restrain yourself in the future. We as Muslims should never wish bad upon others, as hard as it is sometimes. Even if "Karma" (Not an Islamic concept) were to exist, we are not to be the ones meeding it out.

    Your first step is to seek forgiveness of Allah...Allah is indeed the Most Kind and Most Merciful. Then, apologize to your brother or, if he doesn't know about the bad dua, give him a hug or a gift. This will restore your sense of warmth towards him and will make you feel better.

    I do want to point out though, that if this "bad dua" was a common occurrence for you, you might want to start therapy or counselling to learn how to better manage your anger. Sometimes anger is inevitable, but we should use that angry energy for good and for something positive. Try to get out and exercise...take a brisk walk or run on the treadmill. That will dispel your anger and replace it with positivitly, Inshallah.



    • You guys may have anger issues that leads to cursing. I would say that you are not making a dua, in actuality it’s cursing. Calling upon satan to destroy the person. Have a meeting with everyone and admit about your anger and say that we all have a problem when we get mad how can we stop cursing at each other. You be the better person and show them kindness.

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