Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Surely Allah will help me stop this marriage…?

forced marriage

Assalamualaikum.....
Im n love with a guy very much but my family didn't accept him & I have tired hard to convey my father but I cnt...then my father engaged me to some other boy...after few months I gonna get marry...
Still nw I cnt forget him...I'm totally blank don't know what to do know.. but I am sure that I'll nt be happy with any other person other than him...one thing I need my dad happiness I want to make him happy...
Can u plz guide what should I do now. ...still now I trust surely Allah will help me stop this marriage...
We both love truly but thy r nt accepting...we r not in touch each other but still I can't forget him...
What can I do now plzzzzzzzz guide me pray fr me...


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3 Responses »

  1. Aslaamualaykhum

    Firstly, have you told your father that you DON'T want to marry this person? There's a specific line in your post, which I will quote, that makes me think you haven't. There's your first problem. If you don't want to marry someone then tell your father that you don't want to marry them, otherwise, I'm sorry to say but then it is your own fault that you are in this situation.

    Secondly, "one thing I need my dad happiness I want to make him happy" - this is the line that I wanted to quote. If you're willing to disregard your own happiness and put yourself through a marriage that, not only you do NOT want to enter, but could potentially be full of misery, then you don't want a leg to stand on and there's no point in you really even making this post.

    It says, EXPLICITLY IN THE QURAN AND HADITH, that a person cannot be forced into marriage. My advice to you would be to tell your father that you don't want to marry him and, also, tell the boy that you are engaged to that don't want to be married either. If you go ahead with this marriage then not only is it your own fault for not speaking up and standing your ground against your father, but you would be ruining an innocent man's life.

    You shouldn't just disregard your own happiness for a lifetime of potential misery just to make your father happy. There are limits to everything and that includes being obedient to parents.

    I hope things go well for you but you need to make it known to all the parties involved that you do not want to get married otherwise it's your own fault and there's no one to blame but yourself.

    May Allah bless you and your family

    Eid Mubarak

  2. Dear Sister: Please tell your father you love him, but that you don't want to get married to the man he selected for you. Tell the man he wants you to marry, that you do not want to marry him. Tell your imam you are expected to marry someone but you do not want to get married. If necessary, make a badge to wear that reads "I don't want to get married to [the selected person's name]. Or make copies of the hadith regarding forced marriage all over your home, on your bedroom door, on the refrigerator, washing machine, kitchen and bath cabinets. Maybe then your family will figure it out -- that you don't want to get married to the man they picked for you.

    In Islam a woman can not be forced into marriage. While children must respect their parents, parents also have a duty to respect their children. This is a sound hadith/ruling. There is no doubt about this.

  3. If you trust Allah like you say you do, then pray salat- al- istikhara, problem solved!

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