Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My father is breaking the family with his verbal abuse

Verbal abuse

My father mentally torture us siblings and my mother with his words. He didn't hit us ever, nor my mother. But he use his words and says things that shatter us and our confidence.

My mother has never been happy in this marriage, I can see that, but she never says a single word to him.

I just want someone to tell me any dua or zikr to overcome my problem. My siblings are younger, I don't want them to suffer with all this. Because of all this they cannot focus on their studies. Please help me.


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3 Responses »

  1. Seems like you may be afraid of him. Have you spoke to him? See how he reacts. If no one in the household speaks up then he’ll keep doing it as he thinks he has powers over you.

  2. Assalaamualaykum Zunu,

    I'm so sorry to hear of the pain that is being inflicted on you by your father. Studies have recently shown than psychological and emotional abuse affects the same pain centers in the body as does physical abuse, so do not minimize your problem. It is very grave.

    The best dua you can recite for this situation is one in which you pour your heart out to Allah in your own words and straight from the heart. And don't be afraid to cry during your dua if you are ever feeling upset. Go into sujood position (forehead to the ground) while you are saying it...that is even better.

    I hope this helps...may Allah guide your father and relieve you of your pain, ameen.



  3. Assalaaamualaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakaatu.

    Before I tell you about this amazing dua from Quran, you need to do two things for it to work. One, believe in the power of dua. Second, be patient and persevere with this dua. Make it a part of your praying routine to realize its true benefits.

    "HasbiyAllahu laa ilaaha illa huwa alayhi tawakkaltu wa huwa Rabbul arshil adheem"

    Translation: "Allah is sufficient for me. None has the right to be worshipped but He, in Him I put my trust and He is the Lord of the Mighty Throne." (The Noble Qur'an: Surah 9, Ayah 129)

    Hadeeth: Allah will grant whoever recites this seven times in the morning or evening whatever he desires from this world or the next.

    Reference: Ibn As-Sunni (no. 71), Abu Dawud 4/321. Both reports are attributed directly to the Prophet Pbuh (Marfu’). The chain of transmission is sound (Sahih). Ibn As-Sunni.

    Recite this short power packed dua every morning or evening till you memorize it. Then you can use it as often as you like, and at anytime as well. It is a glorified supplication from the Quran, and you can invoke Allah with it, whenever you want.

    Sometimes Allah swt keeps things at a distance from you, while He wants to test your patience, and only wants to beautify the reward for you. This delay is not only a trial, but also, it is a means of your preparation. Sometimes, you think you can handle somethings, but only Allah knows what you can handle and not. Trust His wisdom. He swt knows you more than you will ever know yourself.

    Keep making this dua every morning or (and, whenever you like, the more the better) evening 7 times without fail. Ask for things that are important to you, and see how things around you change.

    You may not see the results immediately, but things will be falling in their place, in sha Allah. You will see things which were difficult before getting easy, tight shut doors opening up.

    An accepted dua is not always realized in giving something to you, but sometimes also by protecting you from somethings. A dua can become a means of saving you from a calamity that is about to befall you. It can save you from falling into errors, strengthen your Imaan by not letting you fall into the trap of shaitaan, and keep you away from any harm.

    No dua ever goes waste. If it is not realized in the form you want it, it will, in sha Allah be manifested in some other way. If it is not realized here, it will be in sha Allah in granted to you in Aakhirah. I know it is difficult to comprehend as aakhirah seems like a distant time and place, and you would like to have it here and now. But believe me, we will all need it more there than we can need anything ever here. On that day, we would be wishing, that none of our prayers had been accepted in this dunya, so that we could get all those benefits in aakhirah.

    The most important prerequisite for this duaa and any other duaa or act of worship for that matter is, belief. Sow the seed of belief so deep in your heart, that nothing disrupts or uproots it. No calamity, not any number of trials should be strong enough to shake your life, if you truly believe in Allah. Believe that Allah loves you and wants only the Best for you. Be sincere in your faith, and remember our Creator is the Most Merciful, count on His mercy. Remember that He swt is Just and is not unfair to any living soul.


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