Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Christian wife is trying to force me to leave Islam

cloud of faith, interfaith, many religious symbolsSalam and Hi Everyone,

First of all I love my wife .We been married now 7 years. There are some times when we argue about things but we solve them with  our love. Sometimes  she don't trust me and she asks me some questions that I know its going to hurt her, and other times she believes that I go quiet and did not answer her questions. I just tell her that I love you and then she and I stop talking for two to three days and then it come to normal as I start talking to her first sometime she start first.

I am muslim and she is christian but we love eachother alot. First year of our marriage she applied for divorce because her aunts and mom want her to go to clubs or have a guy friend just enjoy the life. I know from the begining that her parents and the family did not want to accept me unless I become a Christian. But my wife she didn't care for that. We got married first in the mosque in front of the imam and then in the Catholic church in front of the priest.  Somehow her  mom told her that her cousin wants to move to the city and that she needed some help to settle down which would mean my wife would have to go and help.

My wife asked me if she could go, and I knew in my heart what they up to but I didnt care, I saw the smile on my wife's face and I don't want to hurt her. I said OK, as I gave her permission before with any friends go anywhere she want to.  Anyway,  after her cousin was moving in, about six months later my wife filed for divorce and kicked me out. She and her cousin start living together. The reason was that her mom said to her daughter that I had interfered with her cousin as I was working all day and all day outside.

I went to her its not true, that they are lying and not telling the truth - and that I love her a lot. I didn't give up like that, I went to her many times. Finally she got mad on her mom and told her that she had two faces: she is nice with me when I am alone when I am not there she get different. She said she did not like it when mom was saying bad words about me. So she took the divorce back. We start living together. 6 years in our beautiful house which we bought next to her parents house so she doesn't miss her parents and family.

Her parents, friends, brother and sister in law come to the house all the time. They really did not like the Muslim religion and sometimes when they say something about my religion I argue with them. Then they get quiet and change the topic. They wont talk to me or won't answer me when I ask a question .They want to put me down in front of every one Whenever I visit one of their family they'll have every one's pictures on the wall and the fridge except mine, I don't say anything because I don't care first place. All I care about is my wife.

Now in her family everyone has got married and had a kids, especially her brother had two kids. My wife ran day care for two years, and her mom and brother kept  telling her a lot about me to make me convert to the Christianity. She told me I told her I love you but I love Islam too, I respect your religion and others religion too but I never think it in me that you would convert to Islam, I wish for you that  God shows you the right path but it's your religion, that's what you grown up with and that's what you and your family believe.

She said she want kids and her kids to be Christian and I told her you are talking your family's tone right now. Why our love grown? Ours kids will understand both religion without any force but with freedom. She's applied for divorce now with the help of her brother and family and the only option they gave me if I want to come back  is if i accept that Jesus is the son of God, then she will let me in the house and in her life other wise we have no future. I had not seen my family for 10 years and I am the oldest in the family so I had alot of responsibity for my family and I do regularly talk to my family on the phone and internet and I miss them a lot. I told my mom about it and my wonderful mom told me it's your decision and we will be with you all the time .You are going to be our future. Then how I can convert myself?

I respect the religion but they have to respect it too and understand as well that other people have family too and hearts too. Why why is religion the only solution of the marriage? I see a lot of successful marriages with partners who are in different in religion.Then how can we can do it?

Now I am waiting for the court's date and her decision but I am praying to ALLAH to show  me the right path and to help all humanity.

Please let me know what I have to do next. I love my wife alot but love Islam too.

- khalid2010

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19 Responses »

  1. Dear brother Khalid, As-salamu alaykum,

    What your wife is asking you to do is unacceptable. How can she ask you to give up the religion of truth, and to declare your belief in a lie? To declare that a man is the son of God? Astaghfirullah. She is asking you to give up your faith, your integrity, your self-respect, and give your allegiance to a lie. No Muslim could accept this demand.

    It seems that she has made a choice between her family's demands, and you, and she has chosen her family.

    I'm sorry that this has happened to you, but at least it happened before you had children. I understand that you love her, but she has made a choice, and her choice does not include you, your feelings or your needs.

    You should refuse this demand of hers. Maybe she will change her mind when she sees that you are firm on your faith. If not, then it's time to accept that she is not the right person for you.

    For others who may be contemplating a relationship with a non-Muslim, let this serve as a warning. Compromising your faith does not work. Seek a pious Muslim for a spouse, and you'll have a common foundation of faith on which to build.

    Wael
    IslamicAnswers.com Editor

  2. Brother Khalid:

    I have a one-line suggestion for you:

    Sell everything, but do not sell your akhirah for the pleasures of this world.

    It is OK to love a Christian girl, but if love for her comes before the love for Allah and His Honorable Messenger, then it means you need to do a serious assessment of your own self, and your own state of imaan and religon. As Brother Wael has mentioned, didn't your lover choose her false religion and a great, abominable lie about Allah over you? She did; she chose the falsehood. Her decision and stance should have made your decision making easy.

    Well, it may be hard for you to take it, but I am saying this once again: do not sell you akhirah.

    Some other observations:

    We got married first in the mosque in front of the imam and then in the Catholic church in front of the priest.

    Does Islam allows marriage before a priest?

    She said she want kids and her kids to be Christian and I told her you are talking your family's tone right now. Why our love grown? Ours kids will understand both religion without any force but with freedom.

    In the Quran Allah said:

    O you who have believed, let not your wealth and your children divert you from remembrance of Allah . And whoever does that - then those are the losers. [63:9]

    O you who have believed, indeed, among your wives and your children are enemies to you, so beware of them. But if you pardon and overlook and forgive - then indeed, Allah is Forgiving and Merciful. Your wealth and your children are but a trial, and Allah has with Him a great reward. [64:14-15]

    Allah has declared our Muslim children and wives as our trial. He has also declared that we will be among the losers in the hereafter if our excessive preoccupation about them prevents us from remembering Allah. If that is the case with Muslim children and wife, how can you even think of allowing your children grow as Christian? O my brother! The Hereafter and the Day of Resurrection are reality. We will have to stand before Allah one day. On that day, will you want to see your children cursing you because your failure as a father to teach them the Truth?

    Why why is religion the only solution of the marriage?

    Because the the Deen al Islam, the religion of Allah, legislates every aspect of our life, including marriage. If someone calls him/herself a Muslim, then he or she has no other option except to submit to the will of Allah.

    but I am praying to ALLAH to show me the right path and to help all humanity.

    What do you mean by helping the whole humanity? Do you draw an utopian picture in you mind where Muslims love Christians and people of other religions and vice-versa? If the answer is yes, then know that such utopian picture only comes from Shaytan, and your own whims and desires. I do not want to hurt you, but be practical and honest here brother. You want to protect your marriage, and this is demanding you to compromise your religion. Internally you are feeling guilty about compromising the Truth, the religion of Allah, but externally your are trying to console such decision by drawing this flowery, utopian picture. This is nothing but a delusion from the Shaytan. Because in reality, the Truth cannot co-exist with falsehood. The Truth is from Allah whereas falsehood is from the Shaytan. Had Allah willed, He could have made this world an utopian world. Had He willed, He could have made all of human beings follow a single true religion like the angels. But He did not will so. He did not intend such utopian world, because He wanted humans to understand and separate the Truth from falsehood. This is the trial for us. The Messenger of Allah has given us all the weapons to win this trial. The key weapon was-let not this world delude you. Now, it is up to individuals to decide if we will merge ourselves with the group of Messengers, the sure victors on the Day, or the group of Shaytan, the sure losers on the Day.

  3. Dear Brother Khalid,

    I have a personal experience. My father was married to Catholic woman before he met my mother. They had one girl, my half-sister. She is not Muslim. Her mother even promised my dad that the children will be Muslim, but backstabbed him and raised my sister Catholic. Now my sister doesn't know a single thing about religion, she says she doesn't believe in God most of the time.

    Please, brother. Divorce this woman. Your children have a high chance of coming out confused, and you must love Allah (SWT) before anyone else. You will find a good Muslim woman, insha'Allah, like my father did when he repented.

  4. Dear brother,

    My opinion on this is that its common sense that first a man/woman looking to get married should first consider marrying within the faith and give preference to a Muslim. At the end of the day you are on the same wave length and you will understand one another more. Marriage is hard enough but having someone from the opposite side of the table can make it more difficult. I’m not a scholar but to me its common sense. I’ve seen a neighbor go through more worse than you because you don’t have children in the picture yet…… His wife was a Christian and they had three sons they all became Christians and married non muslim women. That’s why it’s better to marry a Muslim whether she or he is a born Muslim or revert. One of the things you should look for is religion as the Prophet said "A woman is married for four things, …her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a losers.” I remember watching an Ahmed Deedat lecture may Allah grant him paradise he said something which makes you think; when you get divorced or something goes wrong in the marriage they take the children away to their aunties and uncles and Christianize them your Muhammads and Khadijahs. So you can compromise everything else but when it comes to your faith then it becomes serious and if you stick around and she doesn’t change then slowly and gradually with time she will start to change you and your kids!

  5. Salaams brother khalid2010
    I have to be honest I may be harsh I am sorry but my best friend brother is in the same situation. I know love is blind but why don’t people sort these kind of issues out before marriage? I totally feel you brother you can’t leave ISLAM its part of you, your identity, your background, you live your life through allah who has created us with everything and most beautiful things. To me it seems she don’t love you really if she did she would have converted. I personally don’t agree with mix marriages because the other half does lie and think yeah yeah its alright but then the true colours come out its all fake and a trick to marry. Marriage is not a joke you have to accept it with purity and respect. One thing I will say you are who you are, a muslim so stick to being a good muslim. What happens when you have kids and this woman is doing what she is already doing to you? Who's to say your kids wont be muslims. To me this woman as already chosen her family over you and sounds to me she dont want nothing to do with islam.

  6. Brother I too have thought of leaving Islam just to find a man...I am a divocred muslima and finding a muslim man is not easy at my age..I am also a revert...One thing I realized was that Islam is a way of life...my way of life....it was the religion I choose....no man or prospect of marriage is worth giving up my beliefs in one God and belief in the last Messenger pbuh. Islam is part of my soul and in every breath I take....Brother no man or woman is worth giving up your soul....If this woman truly loved you she would never give you such ultiumatums....she is allowing her family to control you and tell you what to do....The only truth is in the Quran....this is the truth that should be followed...Brother please don't leave the only true religion.....Have faith that Allah has a reason for everything, and sometimes what we go through are a test from Allah.,..these test can only make us stronger in our faith...brother be strong.....

  7. dont leave islam i can leave my life but not islam and tell her to bye if she cant be with u man y did u married her first u shouldnt second never leave religion if it comes to this then divorce ehr and she is girl who go out etc which is she will not be withu however she will leaveu one day but if she dont one thing is for sure never leave your religion its maybe test from allah and never leave religion even u have to leave the whole world never let your physical body heart to overcome your supiritual love for islam

  8. Hello sir. Peace be with you. I am a Christian but i hope you will hear opinion. In my opinion, it is best that you divorce your wife because she and her family have no respect for you. Do not give up your way of life and your faith. You should find an awesome muslim woman 1000x greater than your current wife. Sometimes in life we thought that we found the greatest things we want but it is not. I will pray to Almighty God( The Lord and God of Jesus Christ-my teacher) to give a beautiful wife who will love and respect you until the end of times. Let God Almighty, the Lord of Jesus christ and all the holy, write your love story for HE is greatest love story writer of all. Peace be upon you.

    • Peace Be Upon You

      Whatever you wrote is so beautiful, Nobody should be forced to change their religion. Nobody should be forced to give up their beliefs for anyone, whether they are Muslim, Christian, Jewish, Hindu, Buddhist, etc. Conversion should only be a choice, not forced. I am glad that someone from the Christian perspective believes this too. 🙂 May the God of Jesus Christ bless you.

      -Pepper

  9. Dear Brother, I believe many of our brothers and sisters here had given their frank opinions. Do the solat Istiharah and seek guidance from Allah the one true God who deserve to be worshiped. And here you have Brother Jason, who is a Christian, have given you the best advice with a prayer. Allah will guide those who seek guidance from Him. Insyallah.

    Peace be upon you.

  10. all i got a say is that u dont give up your religion for anyfin
    i kno how hard it can be if u love this woman this much and you the onli person who will eva undersatnd ur love for her:
    jus think about it an ask sumone to help u move on
    in islam many of the prophets made sacrifices, right
    so the quesion is will u sacrifice this woman for allah???
    one really IMPORTANT thing yopu have to REMEMEBA is that it is your time and allah is testin u so u need to have faith
    hope this helps....
    =)

  11. Salaam aleikum,
    To start I will mention a hadith of Our Beloved Prophet (Swalallahu Alaihi wa Salaam), in the meaning of the hadith it was said that before the end of time it would be so much trials that "a Mu'min would go to sleep as a believer and would wake up as a disbeliever and vice versa" but why would someone change his religion and renounce islam in a matter of a day or a night, and it says because they will sell islam for a small price of this dunnya, they will sell islam for the sake of fame and dunnya. If we reflect up on this hadith it is more than obvious that we are really moving toward the end of time, May Allah TA'ALA preserve us and keep us sound.
    Now my brother in islam, this surely is one of the tricks of the accursed shaytan, may ALLAH TA'ALA preserve you and guide, and give you relief from this trial. But my suggestion to you is be patient, and never give up islam because this is indeed a great trial you are going through, also keep in mind that this woman, even though she is your wife, she is just a human and a woman, and what is with Allah AZZA WA JAL is way better, meaning JANNAH AND THE HURRYA. It is also one the tricks of the shaytan, to make you think you can't live without this woman, or your life would be miserable without this woman, but brother be patient and Allah will give you a way out. I leave you with these words and please forgive if I say anything out of line, barakallahu fik, jazzakallahu khair.

    Salaam aleikum.

  12. I grew up as a christian and I am converting to Islam. My fiance of over a year now is muslim. He never asked me to change my religion for him because he loved me too much. I decided to convert not too long ago and for my own reasons. I've found that Islam is the right religion for me. If your wife really loves you she wont care about the religion you are and for your future children with this woman if it should happen should be able to choose their own religion and their parents should control them. It is up to them to find what religion they want because they will choose when they are older to convert if they think they chose the wrong one. I don't think its right of everyone to tell you to divorce this woman when you truly love her but I also believe that you can't give up the religion you love just for someone you love. I was able to give up my religion because I was never faithful to it and I was able to see the beauty of Islam. I would try talking to your wife without her family involved to make her understand. If she really loves you she wont go through with the divorce or making you convert.

    Kayla

  13. Salamualaikum Wr Wb

    Hey bro...Did you ask yourself Who created your wife whom you love so much? It's AllahSWT...so inshAllah i hope you'll take the sincere advice from our beloved brothers and sisters from the comments above...

    Pray to AllahSWT either to open your wife's heart to islam or to bless you with a Muslimah who'll be way better than your christian wife!

    SubhanAllah indeed this is something difficult what you are going thru.... make sure you read the Quran everyday with translation http://noblequran.com/translation/index.html

    if you havent given a copy of the Quran with translation to your wife then you should do so... Allah Knows Best

    may AllahSWT help you bro!
    So verily, with the hardship, there is relief, Verily, with the hardship, there is relief... {94:5-6}

  14. i am sure it is her parents fault they affect here toward the worse that is the main reason i prefer to stay away from familly because they try to control my life if i were you i would leave you should not give in to their terrorism if you do she will always threat you with divorce every time she wants to force something on you you might truly love her but love can be successfull only when it is produced by both sides but it seems to me that her cult is more important than her love for you because love=acceptance and that is something her religion did not teach her that

  15. Khalid, my heart goes out to you. My husband and I have gone through a similar situation.

    I am a devout Christian and my husband is a Muslim. However, God has blessed us with a wonderful and happy marriage. Though I love my husband deeply, I was apprehensive to enter in marriage with a Muslim man; my family are all zealous Christians. His family is very conservative and devout to their religion as well, so I expected to encounter similar biases about interreligious marriage from his family too (though I never did). Some friends suggested that he would beat me if I did not convert to Islam and obey him in every way. However, after having read the Koran, I can be assured that I will always be treated with respect and not expected to convert unless I sincerely wish to without pressure. I don't wish to convert; I love my religion furiously. My husband is wonderful in every way, and kinder to me than many Christian men are to their Christian wives. However, I do not wish my husband to convert to my religion. Christ instructed us to "love your neighbour as yourself"; I would not want to be pressured to convert to any religion at all, and I would rather be put to death in the most painful way possible than abandon it; so I would never expect my husband to be in the same situation where he is pressured to convert. Shouldn't your wife grant you the same kindness? I admit, Christianity is a very exclusive religion, and sometimes I wonder if my husband will not join me in heaven. However, God is omniscient; no one is going to hell over something stupid. It is always at the back of my mind, however. I feel a bit lonely Friday's and I am sure my husband feels the same Sunday mornings, but I could not bear for my husband to go through a personal faith crisis. Do you think your wife has similar thoughts, Khalid? She has a strange way of showing them, however. Perhaps she needs to read her Bible!

    My husband's family has been wonderful; they opened their doors to me, allowing us to live with them, even paying for my education after my parents were unkind to my husband. My family caused me great stress, saying "If you love her, don't marry her!" to him every day for over a year before we were married. My family and I barely spoke for years, and it has left me heartsick. God hardwired us to obey our parents. However, my parents should have trusted me to adhere to my religion. Whenever I saw my parents, they would burst into tears. It was very hard... but instead of taking it out on my husband, as your wife seems to be doing with you, we talked calmly and rationally about my sadness regarding my family, and my husband has been a wonderful comfort to me through it all. Strangely, my parents eventually realized I was happy with my husband, and they began to love him and accept him because he was so good to me. My parents still look at me with sad eyes now and again, but my mom recently said to me, "I think that people just want good things for their families... for them to be heatlhy, happy, and positive contributors to society and their communities, regardless of their religion." It may not sound like much, but for her it was a big step!

    Converting for me has never been an option; I would expect my husband to follow Islam as sincerely as I do Christianity. The important thing is to be respectful of one another's thoughts and beliefs, and to treat each other as we would want to be treated ourselves. I must admit, there are some things in the Koran I do not agree with; but isn't there a verse that says something like "the best of you act the best to your wives"? Well, my husband is one of those best men!

    Divorce can be ugly, as I've seen among friends. However, it sounds like your wife needs to be her own person and be assertive with her family. She should say something to them like, "I love you and will be here for you, but please stop pressuring me to divorce my husband. I will no longer speak about this topic with you because it is destroying my marriage. You should trust me to be devout to my religion, but this is my life and I love my husband. Please back off." Things will get bad with her family at first, and the family will worsten in their treatment of your wife for a little while; however, they will slowly come to acceptance, and back off; perhaps they will one day accept you. Your wife's family are indeed hypocrites; do they even follow their religion which they are making a huge deal about you converting to?

    You and your wife need to sit down with a third party, perhaps a counselling psycholgist, and learn to communicate effectively, assertively, and constructively with each other. Do not sit down with an Imam or pastor; they are biased, and often severely lacking in counselling skills. However, you and your wife have an advantage over me; you remarked that she is Catholic. The Pope, who is the head of the Catholic church, believes that Mulims and Christans follow the same God. I am Lutheran, and though it is far less extreme than Catholicism in many respects, most Lutherans maintain that Muslims and Christians cannot follow the same God. (You can make a Biblical case and have an argument grounded in the Koran for the same argument, as I am sure you know.) If your wife and her family follow the teachings of the religious leaders of the Catholic church, then they can relax a bit because you are a child of God! (This may seem a bit ridiculous to protestant Christians and Muslims, but it may comfort her a bit if she is worried about you going to hell.) Also, Catholocism is a works-based religion; if you are a good person (as I am sure you are!) her family also should ease off.

    I realize that my husband and I have an atypical interfaith marriage. However, we are both scholars, I suppose; we have had some wonderful conversations and have learned loads from each other. My husband is a wonderful companion. A marriage should make the husband and wife grow morally, intellectually, and spiritually... which, in a strange turn of events, has strengthened both my husband and I in terms of our own individual development.

    However, If you do stay with your wife, I would advise you severely against having children. God made that decision for me; I am physically incapable of having children. If we did have children, I would want them to be Christian, and he would want them to be Muslim; as a result, they would probably end up as atheists or agnostics due to confusion. It may sound awful, but I honestly believe that's how it is. Children will be a curse to your marriage instead of the blessing God intended them to be.

    You and your wife might be able to save your marriage. Her threatening you with divorce sounds like a mask to me for larger issues; is she worried you might not see each other in heaven, or is she so severely anxious from the harassment of her family that she doesn't know what else to do and feels like she can please no one and has lost control of her own life? You two need to communicate effectively. It is also important for you two not to withdraw emotional closeness from each other either. Ignoring one another is juvenile. However, if things do not change, I am sorry to say, but divorce might be necessary. If she is as commited to the marriage as you are, she should be willing to work at it, go to therapy, and change her attitude with adhering to her religion and allowing you the returning favor to do so to yours. If God had thought interfaith marriage could never work, he wouldn't have made it lawful or possible or alowed it to be written in the Bible or Koran, would He?

    God bless, and peace be with you.

    • I admit, Christianity is a very exclusive religion, and sometimes I wonder if my husband will not join me in heaven.

      According to Christianity, all people who have not taken Jesus (PBUH) as their savior will be thrown into Lake of Fire, don't they?

      Despite your firm belief in Christianity, I am going to invite you to Islam. Who knows, may be Allah will open your heart from Islam.

      _______________________________________________________________________________

      In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.

      From Stranger (out of his responsibility as a Muslim to convey the message to others and genuine concern to save another human being from a life of eternal regret) to Ms. Sara.

      “Read in the name of thy Sustainer, who has created.
      Created man out of a germ-cell!
      Read - for thy Sustainer is the Most Bountiful One
      who has taught [man] the use of the pen -
      taught man what he did not know.” [The Noble Quran 96:1-5]

      "Closer to people draws their reckoning, yet they continue to blithely turn away. Whenever there comes to them a new reminder from their Lord, they listen to it, but take it in jest; their hearts set on (worldly pleasure)." [The Noble Quran 21:1-2]

      Peace be upon those who follow true guidance and believe in Allah and His messengers. I bear witness that there is no God but Allah and all His messengers, from Adam till Muhammad (May Allah’s peace be upon them), were His slaves and Muhammad (May Allah’s peace be upon him) is His final messenger to humankind.

      Allah has no associate. He is the Sovereign, the Holy, the Source of Peace, the Giver of Peace, the Guardian of Faith, and the Preserver of Safety. He has taken neither a wife nor a son and I bear witness that Jesus (May Allah’s peace be upon him), the son of Mary, a messenger, is the spirit of Allah and His Word which He cast into Mary, the virgin, the good, the pure, so that she conceived Jesus (May Allah’s peace be upon him). Allah created him from His spirit and His breathing as He created Adam (May Allah’s peace be upon him) by His Hand. Allah said in the Quran:

      And [for] their saying, "Indeed, we have killed the Messiah, Jesus, the son of Mary, the messenger of Allah ." And they did not kill him, nor did they crucify him; but [another] was made to resemble him to them. And indeed, those who differ over it are in doubt about it. They have no knowledge of it except the following of assumption. And they did not kill him, for certain.Rather, Allah raised him to Himself. And ever is Allah Exalted in Might and Wise. [The Noble Quran 4:157-158]

      O People of the Scripture, do not commit excess in your religion or say about Allah except the truth. The Messiah, Jesus, the son of Mary, was but a messenger of Allah and His word which He directed to Mary and a soul [created at a command] from Him. So believe in Allah and His messengers. And do not say, "Three (trinity)"; desist - it is better for you. Indeed, Allah is but one God. Exalted is He above having a son. To Him belongs whatever is in the heavens and whatever is on the earth. And sufficient is Allah as Disposer of affairs. [The Noble Quran 4:171]

      Having said so, I invite you to Allah alone with no associate and to His obedience and to accept Islam, the complete code of life and the ultimate submission to the will of the Creator, that was revealed to Adam, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Lot, Ishmael, Jacob, Joseph, Job, Jethro, Moses, Aaron, David, Solomon, Elijah, Elisha, Jonah, Ezekiel, Zechariah, John, Jesus and was finally perfected and completed through Prophet Muhammad, the seal of all messengers (May Allah’s peace be upon all of them). Allah have sent messengers to humankind from time to time in infuse fear of Allah in every living person and convey His message, so that the charge may be proved against those who reject the Truth in the Day of Judgment. Allah said:

      “And be conscious of the Day on which you shall be brought back unto God, whereupon every human being shall be repaid in full for what he has earned, and none shall be wronged”. [The Noble Quran 2:281]

      Whoever accepts Islam and the admonition of Allah, does it for his or her own good. If you embrace Islam, you will find safety and security (both in this world and the hereafter), and Allah, the Sublime, shall reward you doubly (both in this world and the hereafter). But if you refuse to do so, you will have to bear the burden of the transgression (in the hereafter).

      If you accept this proposition, forward this message to your family members, relatives, and friends. If you reject this proposition, I ask Allah to be witness that I have conveyed the message to you, and I recite to you the following verse from the Holy Quran:

      "Say: ‘O people of the Scripture (Jews and Christians), come to a word that is just between us and you, that we worship none but Allah, and that we associate no partners with Him, and that none of us shall take others as lords besides Allah.’ Then, if they turn away, say: ‘Bear witness that we are Muslims (the people who submitted to the will of the Creator).’”[The Noble Qur'an 3:64]

      ***
      01.I have started a project of calling people (whom I got acquainted in the course of my life) to Islam through internet, and you are the one such person to receive my invitation. You can consider this invitation letter the greatest invitation you have ever received. That said, you still can either accept or discard the message. Allah said:

      “Let there be no compulsion in religion: Truth stands out clear from Error: whoever rejects evil and believes in Allah hath grasped the most trust worthy hand-hold, which never breaks. And Allah heareth and knoweth all things.” [The Noble Qur'an 2:256].

      I can only convey the message. I cannot change the heart of people and I will not attempt that either. I leave that in the hand of Allah. He said:

      “Verily! You guide not whom you like.” [The Noble Qur’an 28:56]

      Allah however surely guides those who are humble and sincere in their approach to find the Truth. Allah said:

      "Those who behave arrogantly on the earth in defiance of right - them will I turn away from My signs: Even if they see all the signs, they will not believe in them; and if they see the way of right conduct, they will not adopt it as the way; but if they see the way of error, that is the way they will adopt. For they have rejected Our signs, and failed to take warning from them. Those who reject Our signs and the meeting in the Hereafter, vain are their deeds: Can they expect to be rewarded except as they have wrought?" [The Noble Qur'an 7:146-147]

      02. The sentences used in this letter were taken from the letters the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) sent to eight mighty kings of his time. I could have framed a letter myself, but retired thinking no Muslim can write a letter of Invitation to Islam that would be more effective than that of the Prophet in terms of conviction.

      03. If you have doubt about what Islam says about the concept of God in Christianity, I would humbly request you to watch this hour long lecture of Abdur Raheem Green:
      http://www.halaltube.com/does-god-exist

      04. You can read the English translation of the Quran from here: http://quran.com/

  16. Khalid, here are some verses you should tell your wife to read in her Bible. It couldn't hurt for her family to see them either. Hopefully they will be kinder to you after reading them.
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    The following is extracted from 1 Corinthians 7.

    10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.

    12 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. 13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

    15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace. 16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

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    The next passage is from Matthew 5, where Jesus is delivering his Sermon on the Mount. This should provide some comfort for your wife regarding her family. Her family might do well to read some of these verses too.

    39“But I say to you, do not resist an evil person; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. 40“If anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, let him have your coat also. 41“Whoever forces you to go one mile, go with him two. 42“Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you.
    43“You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.’ 44“But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46“For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? 47“If you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? 48“Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
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    Also, in John 10:30, Jesus states, "I and the Father are one." Your wife's family would do well to heed Jesus' words in their Bible. They should start treating you and your wife like human beings. I don't know why your wife's family can't seem to take Jesus' teachings seriously... if they did, they would be treating you kindly.

    Also, Ephesians 2:8 states that "It is by grace you have been saved, through faith; not by works so that no one can boast." Bullying you to convert is not going to earn them favour in God's eyes, that's for sure.

    Also, Galatians 3:28 states that "For there is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male or female; you are all the same in Christ Jesus." This states that people are equal regardless of race, religion, social class, and gender, and that all people should have the same legal and social rights. You and your wife have a rite to a peaceful marriage. Your wife's family should treat you with kindness and tolerance! As Christians, her family should believe that because God died to suffer in the place of all humans the punishments of inevitable sin for everyone; you deserve dignity, kindness, and respect simply because YOU ARE A HUMAN BEING.
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    I hope everything works out for you and your wife, Khalid.

    To any other Muslims reading this: I apologize for the stupidity of any so-called Christians you have encountered in your daily lives. You all deserve nothing but dignity, kindness, and respect as scripture demands. I am embarassed because so many Christians are uneducated in their own religion these days and have no idea what they are talking about. If any of you are thinking about marrying a Christian, for the love of God, please make sure they are educated in their religion or follow it properly. It can be a real headache if they do not for you (and this is coming from a Christian!!!).

  17. Khalid 2010

    No matter what do not change your religion for anyone. Allah has created us all including the woman you love so much. Do not throw away your beliefs for anyone. Your wife will not go with you when you die, your faith will. Do not be one of those who will regret this on the Day of Judgment. And ALWAYS remember that this life is not our true life. The next life, the eternal one, is. & your wife will not be with you then unless she becomes a Muslim.

    -Pepper

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