Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My parents practice Islam, but they don’t read the five daily salah – how can I pray in secret?

Muslim women prayingI'm a 13 year old girl. My parents practice Islam - my family fasts in Ramadan, we read Jumah salah, we've gone on Umrah before - however, they don't read the five daily salah.

Until recently, I had no idea these prayers were compulsory (my parents had always taught me that they weren't) - and now, I'm not sure what to do.

Should I read my salah in secret, as I've been trying to do? Or should I try and explain this to my parents... and, if so, how exactly would I go about doing this?

They know salah is compulsory - I've gathered as much - however, they think that because they're good people, and they regularly give charity and such, Allah will forgive them for missing all of these prayers. Should I try to educate them?

I've been missing a few of my salah, due to the fact that my parents ask me to complete chores/schoolwork, or look after my younger siblings, during the time that I should be offering prayers. Will Allah forgive me for all these missed prayers?

- Zaheerah

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6 Responses »

  1. As Salaamu Alaikum, dear
    May Allah reward you for your desire and effort to pray Salah.
    May Allah make it easy for you to fufill your obligation to Him.
    Pray for your parents and your family. Continue making Salah, When you
    pray if your younger siblings are old enough, let them pray with you.
    When you go to Jummah ask the Imam if he could do a Kutbah on
    making Salaam, if you can do this in a letter if you feel uneasy doing it
    in person. Allah will protect you and guide you, if you have kind parent
    then request to make Salah as a family. If they are rather harsh parents
    ask Allah to change their heart and to incline their hearts towards Him.
    May Allah forgive and have mercy on your parents. And bless you for
    your courage and strength and protect you. Never stop praying even if
    secretly. May Allah bless you with Jannah Al-Firdous.

  2. Dearest sister, you are a very smart 13 year old girl. May Allah bless you.
    5 times a day prayers are IMPORTANT. In fact, it should come first before everything else. Those who dont establish prayers are as good as kafiruns and will be thrown into hellfire.

    So please educate your parents on this. You should not HAVE to pray in secret! May Allah guide you on this. All the best.

  3. Salaam Sister,

    May Allah make this easier for you and keep you on the straight path.

    I think you should first take this approach:
    Pray you 5 daily prayers no matter what the situation and do it in front of your family members. No need to tell your parents about them yet, first try to show them through your own actions. If they ask you why do you pray 5 times a day etc, then tell them, this is the command of Allah and his messenger and I want to be grateful to Allah. I would try this for a few months and maybe they will see through your actions, they will follow you in that regard. Also, be very very nice to your parents no matter what, and do not disobey them in anything. Except if they tell you to disobey Allah by not praying, etc.If you be much nicer than them and show them that your prayer is making you a better person, maybe they will see good in this.

    Eventually if this does not work, talk to your parents in a very nice way and explain to them that we need to pray our 5 daily prayers and this is a requirement of our deen. In Sha Allah, he will guide you and your family. If this still does not work. keep praying your 5 daily prayers because it is better to please Allah then to please his creation, eventually Allah will make the creation be pleased with you because you are pleasing Allah.

  4. Asalamualaykum Sister Zaheera,

    You should definitely still pray your prayers, and I see no reason to do it in secret. If you have trouble opening up to them about it, next time they ask you to watch your siblings, say that you "will definitely do that, no problem, right after you finish your Salah." That way, you have given them the information and still helped them with what they are asking of you. I mean, what can they really say that will be a match for Allah's commands?



  5. Sister Zaheerah, you didn't explain why you feel you have to pray in secret. Will your parents actually punish you for making salat? That seems very strange.

    I disagree with those who say you should preach to your parents or try to pressure them into praying. That will cause trouble. But you don't have to hide, either. Do your prayers and let them see you. That alone is enough da'wah.

    Wael Editor

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