Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Is doing Nikkah with same person twice allowed in Islam?

Assalam O Alaikum,

I am 19 year old Muslimah. I have decided to marry my boyfriend first without my parents knowing anything about it and then marry the same guy again later, with their consent. I want to know if I can do so, because I know that keeping a relationship would lead to committing a lot of sins.

We really love each other and want to spend all our life together.

Please let me know if I am correct. I really want to marry him.


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31 Responses »

  1. Ammy, Walaykumsalaam,

    It is good that you do not want to fall into sin but marriage without wali (without a valid reason) is haraam. It is also haraam to have a boyfriend - if you are indulging in sinful acts.

    Why can you not tell your parents that you want to marry and do the nikah properly? Stop the secrets and make the relationship open and halaal.

    SisterZ Editor

  2. Imagine if you had a daughter, and after everything you done for her, she grew up to do a secret
    marriage. Wouldn't you be upset if you found this secret out? As a mother wouldn't you want to be part of her marriage. A secret nikka can in some ways get you into a lot of trouble for example what if you get pregnant? Will people believe that you was married? Rather then starting of your journey of marriage with lies and secrets just think about your consequences of taking this action...I know your probably waiting for the right time to tell your parents, as your probably still a student, or you probably want to get financially stabled before you can tell your parents...but you must remember that no one knows what's round the is to short...if you found someone you love then tell your parents..don't wait for the right time, because time will never wait for you!

  3. Salaam Aleikoum Sister Ammy,

    a's advice is right on, mashaAllah. "Rather then starting of your journey of marriage with lies and secrets just think about your consequences of taking this action"
    Dear Sister Ammy, my ex-husband kept our nikka a secret from his family and the days turned into weeks, weeks into months and months into years...time passed quickly and he never announced the nikka to his family, therefore he never had the blessings from his parents and the consequence was that the marriage eventually broke down and I am divorcing him. Secret nikkas do create a lot of problems and hard feelings. You say it is you that decided to marry your boy-friend...and you say you both really love eachother and want to spend your lives together, InshaAllah. Does this boyfriend agree to announce the nikkah? Does he agree to announce it with you at the same time? What if somehow he renegs on his promise to announce the nikkah?
    There are many things you must consider first, Sister, please, take it from one who's been there...if you are both so certain of your feelings, then I suggest you tell your families now instead of continuing on as boy-friend and girl-friend which is haram, or having a secret nikkah where you will not be in a dignified position and will have to sneak around. The stress in that itself is problematic on its own. Please Sister, for the sake of Allah, be open about your life and future. I wish you all the best.

  4. but we can't tell our parents because we are just a student now.if we inform them they will becomw so angry..and my boyfriend is also in same condition..he just wants to tell his parents later.besides his family know about me.

  5. I'm 20 I done the same mistake, I married my boyfriend at the time when we went to the mosque I didn't know he told the imam a different story, the imam had thought our parents knew about the nikkah but they were just out of the country. Eventually not even a year passed and our marriage has broken, after the nikkah we had so many arguments it was unbelievable. And im living in shame and guilt that my parents still don't know. I feel ashamed and embarrassed of my self. So please think carefully and don't do this mistake, a marriage without parents consent will not work out, I heard this before marriage I never believed it but now I do. If you love him and he loves you, then be patient Allah will help you, but please don't do this mistake.

  6. Dear brother sister I have been with this guy I love for four years and his mum is not
    Agreeing untill yet we want to do Nikha with his sisters
    Present and announce the nikha then do a second Nikha Infront of my
    Family would that be ok as I do not want to commit any sin

    • Sister M,

      No Nikah is valid without the Wali's consent. You can not do a secret marriage in this way. And a woman can not act as a Wali as per the Sharee'ah.

      You will need to inform your parents about this man in order to marry him. If you need specific advise on your issue, you can post details in a separate post after you login.

      Muhammad Waseem Editor

  7. I am in this position now where i did a nikkah in secret with a girl and its very problematic as the parents do not know about it, there can be many arguements that take a turn for the worse and because you arent living together it is very dangerous . You need the parents advice and blessings and push your parents with love to understand that marriage becomes obligatory under certain circumstances and Allah alone gives success rely on him and ask him for help

  8. I m in love with my childhood friend.

    (Remainder of comment has been deleted. Please log in and write your question as a separate post. - Editor)

  9. I want my answer from an authentic person. Really wise mentor.
    If a couple is sincerly loving eachother. And keeps the fear of Allah in heart. Dont want to commit any little mistake that could anger HIM.
    Their parents dont agree for the time being. They keep prolonging it due to some reasons ignoring the need and sentiments of children.
    What if they both get married secretly.
    And in future iv the parents agree. Would it be jaiz to do another Nikkah as a formality to show ppl. Without disclosing the previous Nikkah to anybody at all.
    Couple keeps the secret in between both of them. And the second documentation is nt proceeded.
    Give me the full detail that wat could be jaiz in it and wat is forbidden.
    And they would not like to disclose it at all maximum both cud share with 1 person in the family. Buh no announcement of frst nikkah. Ever. It may bring Alot of disrespect, destruction and huge disappointments in both the families.
    Sir kindly please give full details and explain it thoroughly. With each acceptance and prohibition.

    • I know the admin will tell you to login and write your question separately. But my short answer is in islam secret marriage is not allowed if both couple fear allah then they should not have think this way to be together. If you marry secretly your marriage will be not valid because a girl need wali without that its not valid. For any reason if its not possible for family to agree this moment it's better to not contact with each other just think what if you marry secretly and later your family do not agree then its a disaster of many lives and if any other reason not possible but it will happen later then you may request your families to do at least nikha and stay parents house by this you won't fall into any haram situation because you both are legally husband and wife.

  10. The question is, can he marry the same women twice? lets suppose she has the wali and his permission, so he marries. Then later he marries her again after letting his parents know that he loves her and without letting them know about the first nikah.

  11. The question is that is it jaiz to do nikah with a same girl after doing before once...reply to question plz no sugestions.plz

  12. I also need to know...

    [Editor's note: Please submit your question as a new post for publication rather than as a comment on an existing post. That way it can be published and answered in turn, inshaAllah.]

  13. Hi, my question is wether a nikkah can happen with a wali and if all the other needed criteria's are included eg proposal an acceptation in the presence of two males etc.. The only barrier would be that the parents of both side will not be aware of this. It will remain a "secret" between the man and wife. Not everyone wants to get nikkah done to have sexual intercourse. For me it's the idea of being able to SEE my other half without guilt of knowing he's not a stranger and he's my husband therefore he can see me. Intention is key in Islam and if everything is in place and the sharia law is followed as well doing as much of the Islamic rules as possible.. Can two people get their nikkah done? So that they can feel as ease of any haramness and being afraid of causing Zina. If a nikkah was done be done Again later on as a formal announcement to the society and parents why shouldn't it be allowed if the person is the same? For me having sexual intercourse is the last thing on my mind so getting pregnant is out of the question. We hardly see each other due to the fact we are trying to stay as halal as possible. But when we do meet the guilt is as such that has lead me to asking this question with thorough detail.

    Please let me know what is needed for an Islamic marriage considering what I and my partner to be In sha Allah want from it and what we plan to do with the contract. Nothing else but be happy to see each other without feeling bad.

    • Salaams,

      The issue here with your question is who would be the wali, if not your father? He has the first right to being your wali. If he's not available for a valid reason, it would go on to your other male relatives in varying order. You can't choose someone outside the family as a wali just to keep it a secret from your parents. That's islamically incorrect.

      -Amy Editor

  14. I am wondering if the above asked question is answered ?

  15. Re: Is it possible to do a Nikah twice with the same person?

    For a direct answer to your question
    I performed nikah with a girl without disclosing it to my parents 8 months back but now my parents are convinced and i would like to perform nikah again with the same girl in the presence of my parents without letting them know about my previous nikah so could you kindly explain us can we marry again according to islamic law and shariah.

    Praise be to Allaah.

    If the first marriage contract fulfilled the conditions and necessary parts, namely the consent of both parties, the presence of the woman’s guardian and the testimony of two Muslim witnesses of good character, then this is a valid marriage contract with all that results from it. But if any of these conditions were not met, then it is an invalid marriage contract and must be repeated.


    It is no secret that the parents have great rights and should be honoured and treated kindly. Hence it is essential to consult them with regard to the matter of marriage and to strive to please them as much as possible.

    If no obvious negative consequences will result from telling them about the previous marriage contract, then it is better to tell them about that and strive to please them. It is more important to tell them if the wife is pregnant, so as to ward off accusations and suspicion.

    But if telling them will lead to obvious negative consequences, such as the fear that they would sever ties with you and the like, then you can pretend to do the marriage contract in their presence or have it registered officially if it was not registered.

    What is meant by pretending to do the marriage contract is that the guardian of the woman should say: I give my daughter or sister So and so to you in marriage, and you should say: I accept to marry So and so -- in the presence of two witnesses of good character, but you should inform the guardian that this new marriage contract does not really mean anything and that what counts is the first one.

    And Allah knows best.

    Islam Q&A

    But sisters please note that all the concerns raised in this thread is very important to look into. Even if there is no legal barrier, people's behaviour differs, so please do think well before making any decisions.

    • Assalamu Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuho

      I have a question and hopefully find an answered In Shaa Allah.
      I am a married man and having a good wife Alhamdulillah. But my wife wanted us to get married again. I agreed but I said we can only make an celebration since our wedding is still valid and legal.
      But I coundn't rejected her willingness to get married again. She wants to wear a wedding gown and feel the crowd etc. Actually we've got married by far from each other, I marry her even though she's in other country due to her nature of work. but this is legal and lawfull in accordance to the islamic tradition. we've been doing the scenario of wedding ceremony (I faced the crowd and stand alone).

      But then, I realize if possible to get marry her again, then why should I decline her desire if there's nothing wrong with. but since I am not sure, I couldn't yet answer her.
      It is possible to marry my wife again?

      Jazakallahu Khairan

    • Assalam walekum,
      Actuly same condition is goin with me.I got marrd with a person frm lat 1 year back...without knowng my parents..but nw the situation is that my parents agree for our marriage.
      Infact date also got decided n wedding preparation goin on..
      Nw I cnt tell my parents that I already marriad wid same guy..
      So we want to do marriage again front of our parents...
      Please help me can we do that........
      I need your help.

  16. Assalamualaikum

    Yes, there is indeed some confusion regarding the answers provided above. In case, a couple have met all the Islamic requirements for nikah, viz. Having a guardian, witnesses, mahr, marriage contract, but the nikah was a secret between the family They now wish to go in for a formal nikah in the presence of relatives. Would this be halal?

    JazakAllah Khair

  17. Aao! I am 20 years old. I've talked to my parents to marry a girl but they are saying it's too early but we want to continue this relationship in halal way so can we do nikah twice to avoid a sin, and we are also living in different cities , Islamabad and karachi?

    • There is no need to do nikah twice. Once is sufficient. However, you must fulfill all the requirements for nikah: agreement of both parties, payment of mahr, presence of witnesses, having a waleemah, etc.

      Wael Editor

  18. Walaikum assalam. ..
    I wanna ask...Something like this happens to me too.. I secretly did nikah with my b.f .... and told my parents they did our walima well... I went my matrimonial house and Been there for 6 month... within 6 month we had many arguments many problems and misunderstanding took place... my parents take me aways for him.... now from 9 months I am living in my paternal house... I really love him and I he love me too.. I want to resettle with him... I can't take divorce. .. no way... I will die without him... my parents doesn't let me go and stay with him... I just wanna ask that "if my parents agree about our mutual bonding then can I do nikah twice with the same person infront of our parents and relatives???"
    Plzzz do reply brother and sister plzzz reply me plzzz... wanna know...

  19. 1st of all in Islam affairs are haraam and no matter how long anyone can wait for this thing they will never get ajr because having affairs in islam is haraam and allah will never bless anyone for haraam things or relationship. Remember one thing dear without the consent of ur parents and without their blessings no relation can work for long. Tell your parents about ur relationship and make them understand it so that they will agree happily with ur decision and then get married... In shaa allah

    • Salamualaykum
      I am a 30 year old muslim woman, engaged to a revert which is 4 months ago. My mother approves of him but I have a problem because my mother is delaying the date for our nikah. This is because my sister is working abroad and she wants for every single one of the fmly members and my relatives to be around during nikah. So my mother ask us to wait for about a year until my sister is able to come back to our home country, and do the nikah then.

      I would like to know whether it is allowed for me and my fiance to go ahead and undergo nikah while appointing 'wali hakim' without my mother knowing, then do another nikah with all my families and relatives present at a time agreed by her? Fyi, my father has passed away and i have a brother, and i have uncles over my dad's side, so i believe my wali is my brother.

      Thank you. Jzkkhairan kathira

  20. Plzz tell mee
    If we done nikha two time with same person...iss it legal....once time secret nikha nd 2nd time when our family is agree
    Plzzz telll me

  21. I also wanted to ask same question ... My one friend had nikkah with a man in present of her family and friends.. after year they want to nikkah again just because they couldn't able to invite all relatives on that moment now they want to celebrate again is it ok?

  22. I hve a question here!
    We both are interested in each to marry
    We are in a relationship he belongs to a good family (islamic) he is going to perform hajj in couple of months
    His family is agree with our relationship nd nikka..
    I told to my father about him
    My father is agree to meet his family but my mother she is not agree with this because we have some financial crisis yet!
    Is this right to do nikkah with witnesses from both of usside (friends witness)??? Nd then later my mother will agree we do re-nikkah?

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