Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Wife left me and took our child with her, I want to leave her but not my son. Please help.

angry wife

I GOT MARRIED ON OCTOBER 23RD 2011. MY NAME IS BILAL & I'M 26

I AM MBA FROM A CHARTED UNIVERSITY.

It is a love Marriage.

My wife was madly in love with me before marriage and she used to call me and remind me that her family pressures her & she will not live without me and all that.

I asked my mother that she loves me why not if I marry her for a peaceful live.

My family was not so much against my marriage but my mother always told me that they are very different minded & because my father has past away & there is no one elder then me they will try to pressure me  for their demands and all that.

I always believed in my wife that she don’t likes her family at all because of their bad behavior with her.

We got married and I faced very bad reaction & ignorance from her family.

I was a daily routine of her mother & sometimes brother to come our home without any reason & her moods changes slowly with me & my mother.

Sometimes I asked her that please ask your mother not to come so regularly but she shouted & responded to me that she will not leave her family for me.

That was a time of impact. She changed totally & now she’s a part of her family. She lived with me just 3 months & he spend more then 8 months with her family.

She makes me no calls & doesn’t even texts me & cares for me at all.

I recently became father of a baby boy & she’s living with her family.

Her demands are very strange she always asked for pocket money what I gave her monthly for expenses.

She is totally changed. I don’t know that someone for whom I disagreed with my family she suddenly forgot my every effort with her everything what I have done for her. My care my love for her.

She argues with me, she replied every word I have said to her. She has very big support of her family. Whenever I feel something right for her in our relation she argues with me and calls her family and they insults me in my decision

But all that does not matter to her in any ways.

As time is passed I don’t want to live with her any more I need my child because I don’t want him to live with them all.

What else I can do?

Please suggest me some thing,

bilal123456.


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3 Responses »

  1. Salam Bilal,

    Brother...may I ask what country you live in? Are there no rules or regulations where you live that would prohibit the mother from taking the child from you? In the United States for example, one parent has no right to remove a child from the other parent simply because they choose to. No matter where you live, I strongly advise you seek help from the courts or find out in the city where you live where you can find some help regarding your child. The best of luck to you. I hope everything works out for the best.

    Salam

  2. Brother, sorry for your situation but it's good it happened before it was too late. After reading your story I think she got married to you because she just loved you she dosent know the meaning of marriage. Anyways brother regarding your child I don't know which country you live in but I don't think the child can be taken away from mother if she can afford the expenses or she can take care of the boy properly that's what court see or others there is time when your child will be able to speak then you can take the responsibility of your son in mean time you should give your child expenses and visit him regular so that he wont forget you. And if she dosent allow you to meet your son go to court for permission then she can't stop you. In this world no one can stop meeting their children if they take the right decision. 

  3. Bro sorry for the situation u r in I can see the whole picture to your words and the ignorance she has for u. Before its too late nd gets even worse. Why don't you teach her a merciful lesson. Before I intend to write my advice in full detail. I advice you to read carefully. First of all Ask her if she cares to leave your child to you? Maybe for a day or so. Ofcourse babies Cry for their mother, so when ever he cries phone her nd tell her how much he needs you mostly. But before you do that let her know how much u love her nd slowly explain to her try ur best to make her understand. If her mother interrupts let her know. Let her hear ur voice as to what you r saying. And inshallah Allah Allah will wake them up n realise what they r doing nd how arrogant they r towards you. Was there a place u loved going to or she when u first married her? Remind her of everything when u two first met. If that doesn't work sit with your mother and maybe make a plan with her. Love can come into our hearts with lots of different ways , maybe she loved you to the point where there was no room left na3uthubilah for Allah. Let her know your side nd try to always stay positive nd have sabir. U nor she is going to be with your parents for the rest of your lives. I do not mean to be offensive but it's reality it's how god has created us, your parents house is not a restaurant nor a lounge for them to come nd go as they like. I can also sense a culture clash here maybe if I'm not wrong. Try to sneak your way into it in order to get her back nd force her heart to open for the sake of your child. Inshallah everything goes to your plans.

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