Islamic marriage advice and family advice

I’m 10, my mom drinks and I hate her

alcoholic drinks, wine, liquor

Alcohol has no place in a Muslim home

I'm 10 years old and my mum has her friends staying in my house. I know they make her drink and influence her to drink wine.

She makes me look after my 3 year old brother every day and I can never rest. I can't take it anymore. I hate her so much right now and it's not healthy for me or my brothers. I need help and walahi I feel like I am going to have a mental breakdown. Someone save me I'm probably going to die at a young age.

I'm scared and if someone tells the police I'll be taken away from my brothers and my home. Someone help. I feel hated and neglected. My mother doesn't think of me of one of her kids. Whenever my mum mentions her children it's always my brothers not me. It's like she doesn't love me.

Whenever I say something she always says "it's my house I can do as I like. You're not my mother you can't tell me what to do." She always calls me and my older brother "stupid s***s" or "f***ing idiotic cows." She even used to smack my older brother and she loves other little girls and treats them like her daughters but I think she hates me. Today I blanked her. I never want to speak to her again.

- Zayna

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12 Responses »

  1. Salam zayna

    I'm sorry to hear of your situation.

    Your mother is doing something bad. But remember keep your duties as her child. Because at the end your mother is going to be questioned about what she has done and is doing.

    Dont use the situation at home to make your own future and life the incorrect path. Fo zikr do dua and pray inshallah your mother will see her wrong doings and ask for forgiveness from you and Allah inshallah.

    Remember Allah sees everything and your hardship. Yes its not right your mother is going what she's doing but remember Allah is always with you.

    Patience is hard but you know that has the most reward.

    Inshallah it will get better ill pray for you. And keep smiling and remember dont use this situation yourself to fall into bad habits later in life.


  2. Salaam Zayna,

    Your only 10 years old and dealing with this situation at such a young age breaks my heart.

    Is there no one in your extended family who can maybe step in and speak to your mum about the way she is treating you. Does she have any brothers or sisters? Or your grandparents?

  3. wheres your father. If your mother does all this how were you informed that drinking is haram in the first place? Your older brother being smacked is child abuse and it must be reported or you and him should try staying with a relative , so this mother of yours cannot hurt either of you any longer

  4. Little sister Zayna,

    We read your problems. Your mother is not doing good with you all. You are innocent and most close to Allah.
    Can you do one thing. Before going to bed wash your face, hands till elbow, wipe water with your hand on the head and wash your feet. If you know how to do wudhu do it.
    Then cover your head with a scarf and sit and make dua to Allah. Tell everything what you are going through. Inshaallah your prayer will be answered immediately. Say the name of Muhammed sallalahu alaihi wasallam in you prayer.
    Ask Allah to forgive your mom and make her a good mother. And pray that she gets rid of Alcohol and friends.
    I will also pray for you. . . . my little sister. May you get a good life ahead.
    We all are with you , do not worry. Do write again what you are going through.

    Hello everyone just pray for this little girl so that her mother gets hidayah.

  5. You sound very mature for a ten year old masha'Allah. What your mother is doing is wrong. It must be very upsetting for you. Can you speak to someone in your family or a mosque teacher? It sounds like your mother needs someone to speak to her and make her realise her behaviour is wrong. Don't worry about social services, splitting up families is an absolute last resort. Please get help as soon as you can, as this is a dangerous situation for you to be in with your younger brothers. And keep making lots of dua to Allah for your mum to be given guidance, In sha Allah she will realise her mistakes and change. Even mums can make mistakes. May Allah make things easy for you.

  6. Zayna,

    You are ten years old and way too young to be dealing with any of this. As MuslimSisterSumi you have any extended family members that you might turn to? An aunt, uncle or possibly your grandparents? It's possible that no one knows what is going on in your home. If no one knows your circumstances, they cannot help you in any way. Please reach out to an adult and confide in them as to what is going on in your home. Maybe then, you can get some help. Allah hu alem.


  7. As salam O Alaikum

    Firstly, which country are you from ?

    Secondly Where is your Father ?

    Thirdly now i would like to say something. In the Country i reside atleast here a 10 year old cant read her textbooks properly surfing an Islamic Forum on the world wide web is beyond that childs dream. I know i am going haywhere from the topic Admins but thats how it is. Humbly sorry for the same.

    Now dear sister Zayna how do you know that your mom is consuming liquor ? Has anyone told you that ? If you say you have seen her consuming it well then how do you know its Liquor may be its not ?

    I would definately like to know which Country you are from.

    Thank You

    Regards and Best Wishes


    • I think it's wrong to doubt the sincerity/truthfulness of a poster, especially if they are 10 years old. If you dont think someone is genuine, no need for you to respond. Your doubt is just a suspicion, and there is equal chance (if not more) the poster is genuine, so instead of helping, you are hurting them, and they are already vulnerable and in difficulty. I know ten year old girls who could write like this.

  8. Assalam O Alaikum wrwb,

    Dearest little angel "Zayna"! First I would like to apologize for my late reply. You are very intelligent and articulate for a 10 year old masha Allah and may Allah protect and guide you always. I hope you are in the best of health and Iman. Please do not consider anything haram like suicide etc or praying for death.

    I read your post couple of times and I am deeply saddened and heartbroken to see you in this situation. Unfortunately, mother who is supposed to protect you is the one abusing you, on top of that burdening you with the responsibility of looking after your younger siblings. She was supposed to be your protector, nurturer, carer, minder, teacher, role model all at once but she has failed miserably and isn't going to change by the looks of it anytime soon.

    I am sorry I don't have a solution that will instantly make her change her ways and become the loving, caring, responsible mother she is supposed to be. I am afraid to suggest that only way out for you is to inform senior family members who can speak to her, encourage and help her give up her addiction by any reasonable/possible means necessary to be able to take care of all of you. If that doesn't help then I am afraid you will have to inform the authorities because this toxic environment is not good for you or your brother.

    May I also know where you father is, while you children are going through this? Also, kindly let us know where you live (country/city etc)? So, we can see if we can connect you with some local shelter for children (ideally a Muslim one) who also may be able to help your mother give up her addiction.

    If you don't want to give anymore information on here in public then please let us know so we may get one of the sister editors to get in touch with you for more details.

    I hope my humble advice was of some help and comfort for you, may Allah (swt) protect all our children from domestic violence and other sufferings of this world. Amin.

    Muhammad1982, Editor

  9. Goodness this is heartbreaking,

    I echo the previous comments, do you have any further family members you can turn to?

    please stay strong you are so precious, your mother is doing things that are wrong, and you are so very smart to realize that so young, try to keep a good relationship with your mother as hard as that may be its not ok to be rude or disrespectful even though you are being treated so poorly and that is probably all you feel like doing.

    Allah sees everything he knows what you are going through, if you keep being strong he will reward you with things you could never ever imagine 🙂 try and remember that through your mothers words and injustice.

    also you have lots of brothers and sisters here that love you for the sake of Allah, if you need to offload your not alone,

    Your big sis in islam


  10. Alcohol is the root of all evil. Your strong mashallah, your in my dua. May Allah make it easy and easy your pain ameen

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