Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Help – I am a muslim guy attracted to guys

Homosexuality in Islam

I'm 15 i started to like guys from age 13/14 and i thought it ll dissapear in time but it got worse and worse

soo today i was with 8-9 friend of mine in school  we were playing studing ect till7:00 pm then all of them went home but I stayed there with one of my friends his name is (i) he is 16-17 yo witch i was kinda attracted to him we messed around a little bit like sexual joke he pretended to have sex with me as a joke(even tho iam ashamed to say but i had an erection then i hide it so he cant see)

then we laughed and kept walking then we saw a friend of ours far away we said lets pretend we are kissing each other as a joke he saw it and laughed and we should ve stoped at that point

but then we said lets do more as a dare we were down soo we went to another place and it was dark he kissed my neck and i did too and i said jump over me he did and he started to touch my legs and chest and I did it too and i was putting my hand over his mouth and kissing it pretending i was kissing his mouth  but I couldn’t wait any more so i kissed top of his lips (again sorry for theses nasty individuals)

but iam pretty sure that we both liked it then i acted like i wanted to vomit  and was not aware frome what i was doing i wasnt realy at that time  but the second after it we discussed for a while that it was just as a friend and it was not a real sexual thing and then we were like it we ll never tell to any body and it was a joke not a real thing but for me it was

so please help me i dont want to do more bad thing may god forgive me from what i did and i am pleased to answer me in the shortest time and yeah btw it was the first time doing any sexual act with any one

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11 Responses »

  1. Your gay feelings come from shaytan. It could be you are posessed or magic was done to you. You need to make ruqyah and ask Allahs forgivness for what you did with that boy. Believe me it is often times jinn or magic because this is not the fitrah and unnatural. I hope I could answer your question. Just start with ruqyah as soon as possible and you will see it will go away in sha Allah. There are a lot of people who are suffering the same and this is often times the solution(ruqyah). And ask Allah to take this from you. May Allah heal you and guide you to the straight path. And be patient with ruqyah it can take you 3 months and more to get rid of the jinn.

  2. Bro ,

    You are very young and these thoughts are because of your friends circle which seems to be bad .
    I suggest you to stop being with such friends .

    Find some friends who are good and follow Islamic way of life .

    Be a good boy and avoid this bad company .

  3. No one really knows why some people have homosexual feelings, there really is no consensus on that. It could be like Justafriend has suggested satan or jinn or perhaps something else.

    Whatever it is that is causing you to have these feelings, there is a dua you can do to make them go away ia. The dua is:

    "Allaahumma inna naj aluka fee nuhoorihim wa nauzubika min shuroorihim"

    (O Allah, we place you in front of them, and we seek refuge in You from their evil/harm).

    Here is a link on how to recite the dua: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCOPM0OTEJM

    In the dua you are seeking protection. In your circumstances, you are seeking protection from your feelings and asking Allah to take them away. Whilst reciting the dua, imagine your homosexual feelings going away - this is very important. You need to do this for several months at least 300 times a day until you no longer have sexual attraction towards boys. For me, this is the best dua in the world, it works for everything!

  4. First of all, you need to get yourself another group of friends. This sort of sexualised behaviour is not funny or normal, whether you are straight or gay. There should be boundaries between friends...you don't kiss, grope and hump them. Just no.

    I'm not going to say you're possessed, or whatever. Some people are born gay, and that's just that. You can't help it. I don't feel comfortable telling you what to do about it, because I honestly don't know. I think you would benefit from reaching out to reputable and understanding Muslim organisations that help and support gay people in the struggles they are facing. If you are close with your family, and they are tolerant, you could even talk to them about your sexuality. But only if you're sure they won't react with anger and abuse...the last thing you need are abusive parents.

  5. OP: I'm 15 i started to like guys from age 13/14 and i thought it ll disappear in time but it got worse and worse

    Are you attracted to girls/women also?

  6. Assalaamualaikum

    Gay or straight, it's not healthy or appropriate for friends to engage in this kind of behaviour with each other. Simulating sexual acts and play acting in this way isn't something that is going to help either you or your friend. If this is the kind of thing you and your friends are doing a lot, it might be time to find new friends.

    Being attracted to people of the same sex at your age doesn't mean that you are necessarily homosexual. It's actually very common for young people to have feelings of attraction to people of the opposite sex, particularly when we live in a world where so many aspects of daily life are sexualised. You may find that these urges go away naturally, or you might find that you continue to feel some attraction towards the same sex. Neither outcome is a disaster. We can't necessarily control who we find attractive - what we can control is what we do about it.

    I think it might help you to have some different friends - people who will encourage you to follow Islamic guidance and not simulate sexual acts with them. I'm not saying that you should completely cut off your current friends, but maybe widen your social circle and inshaAllah you can find some people who are more positive influences on you. Think about the kind of people you want to be around, and look for opportunities to go to places where they might be; go to Islamic classes and prayer sessions, charitable projects, after-school study groups, etc.

    Make sure that you are praying regularly, reading Qur'an, studying the life of The Prophet (peace be upon him) and fasting. Avoid going to places where people engage in un-Islamic activities, and avoid sexualised media (such as most TV shows, a lot of modern music and film, pornography).

    Finally, I would encourage you to be careful if you are looking into support services and websites for people with attractions towards the same sex. Some can be very helpful and supportive, but some can encourage people to engage in activities which are not consistent with Islamic values (for example, going to gay clubs, engaging in casual sex). If you're looking at using a service or website, ask yourself "Is this going to encourage me to be a better Muslim? Is this consistent with the principles of The Prophet (peace be upon him)?" - if the answer is no, choose Islam and walk away from anything that threatens to take you away from your faith.

    Midnightmoon
    IslamicAnswers.com editor

  7. Make new friends, I'm 15 too man but tell those friends that this is making you uncomfortable. What you guys are doing isn't normal and it's OK it's not too late just because you did this doesn't mean you're gay khalas, you might still be attracted to girls and can move on from this. Don't tell anyone about this, keep your sin private and don't talk to these friends anymore. Try and make religious friends, because bad friends especially at our age can seriously mess our lives up for good.
    If you watch gay porn or any porn at all, stop it right now this might be a huge factor at play. Nowadays it is normalized to have feelings for the same gender, but trust me, just make du'aa to go through this difficult time. Don't tell your parents if they don't seem like they're open-minded, in fact don't tell anyone who might get this out. You don't want abusive parents and in shaa Allah someday you can move on, it could be because of hormones. Maybe because there are so many guys around you and you're hormonal, you have feelings for them. But dismiss them and shut them out, exercise whenever you get those sexual feelings or go pray.

  8. Assalamualaikum

    i suggest u to spend more time with scholars and get involved in learning about deen this will help u lot ....it can be a reason u are living with such people around u who are drifting u away from right path pls fight back and spen your time doing good follow sunnah strictly that will help u a lot and be in ablution always ...pray taahjud salah ask from forgivness from Alllah and spend more time with good people around u and break link with bad people ...

    jazakallahukhair

  9. Salaam Alaikum.. Right Brother, I want to make a few points.
    Firstly - Stop Watching Inappropriate Stuff.
    Secondly - Spend More Time Around Your Family.
    Third - Recite The Zhikr Of Allah Whenever You Can (Buy A Finger Counter).
    Fourth - Slowly Distant Yourself From Friends. Don't Cut Completely Off. Once They Have Seen You've Changed, They May Sod You Off Themselves.
    Fifth - Do Not Tell People What You Did. Allah will hide your sin I Pray.. So They Is NO NEED TO START TELLING EVERYONE OR ANYONE.
    Sixth - Find New Friends. Find New Surroundings.
    Seventh - Talk To The Guy You Did This With and Sort It Out. Tell Him.. "I can't believe what we did in jokes. Damn! That was well silly". (Just to emphasise to him that you feel it was wrong)
    Eighth - SHAYTHAAAN - Knows Our Strengths and weaknesses. Know yourself. Strengthen yourself.
    Nine - Make Intention of Marriage Young. You're 15. Aim to get married at 17/19. You will benefit. Don't worry what people will say. Push your family for it.
    Ten - Change Your Thoughts.. Even If you think evil, dirty thoughts. Just remember it is Shaytaan. He knows us in and out. He feeds on our weaknesses. He plays on them. He will put all sorts of crap in your mind. Remind Shaytaan of his own end. Play the game back. Shaytaans also get scared. You'll do fine kid. Don't be a drama queen about it all. Be strong.

  10. I think you are being groomed by the boy/boys to perform gay acts. Your friends are taking you in a very wrong direction regardless of how you feel. Also keep in mind that the road your walking on will lead to a lot of pain. It is something you can change Allah willing but you have to work on it. Unfortunately we live in a world where such views are promoted and encouraged and it works as it is effecting the young and vulnerable children. How do you know you want to commit sexual acts at the age of 13? it is hard to think but sexually charged media and environment forces us to think this way. It could be a phase that passes or your just confused.

    I really pray for you my brother as i have brothers of my own. May Allah make this test easy on you.

  11. I am also 15 Sad to say in my school there are also lots of kids like you i donot found religious kids all kids in my school are dumbs and use abusive language and always talk about sex and girls...Well its 21st century mostly kids watch porn and addicted to porn,porn destroy all teens now a days....now what i say more...

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