Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Dreaming about my husband, although he has left me

Lonely woman walking alone on the beach


I had seen my husband in dream hugging me and loving me, though we don't stay together.
He left me 6 months back without giving divorce. We are not in contact. I don't think about him coz it disturbs me.
I indulge myself in my job. He removed me from the house; in short I am  a victim of domestic violence. My in-laws also don't like me I came to know after marriage, coz I'm my husband's choice not his mother's. My husband doesn't work, he is dependent on his mother.

Still I don't complain but he tortures me, unnecessarily abuses me with very dirty and filthy allegations that I am linked with other guys.

Actually I'm in doubt that there is someone else there in his life, that he wanted me to leave the house. So he tortured me mentally and some time physically. He harrassed me so I leave the house and he can carry on his extra marital affair with other woman but he has not got the guts to say that there is some one in his life, he's blaming me saying that I am linked up with someone.

I don't know what this dream means. At last he removed me from the house  putting wrong allegation on me and no one stopped him coz nobody likes me in that house coz they wanted that their brother, their son should marry the girl of their choice. Even my mother in law tortured me a lot, she taunts me lot everyday and lies to my husband that she misbehaves with me. When I would say to my mother in law that your son is linking me with other guys and talking very filthy sentences about me, she would say don't feel bad all husbands do that so what if he does thank to allah he is not breaking your bones. Only this he is doing you are feeling bad.

My sister in law had miscarriage in 9 months and the child died in womb and they said that child died coz I'm evil eye and unlucky charm for the child. They blamed me for that child's death and whenever his sister gets pregnant they don't tell me, they hide from me and they tell their daughters to hide the stomach from me. His sisters don't come in front of me when they are pregnant.

Once I saw a dream that his sister came to me and saying she is pregnant. I told my husband about this dream he said okay. After after one month she was pregnant but I came to know by reports after 5 months thet she is pregnant. My husband knew that but he didn't tell me. I asked my husband why he didn't tell me about his sister - he said you are unlucky charm what you want again my sister's child die coz of you?. You are a female snake who bites other's happiness that's why we decided not tell you anything. I just keep crying after listening to this I was broken. I never back answer, coz if I speak also he raises hands on me, throws whatever stuff's in his hand, if throw food from the plate and then put chilled water on me from the bottle and asks me to stand till he removes the frustration on me.


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11 Responses »

  1. Tht person will be punished nd his family by ALLAH
    GT rid if him frm ur heart nd life hez nt worth
    Ur tears r pain jst b happi n enjoy life

  2. Sister ,

    It is very sad to know about your situation .Pray to Allah for the solution .
    Don't tolerate further humiliation from your husband and in laws .Involve your parents/elders and find some solution for it .
    May Allah help you .

    Allah hafiz

  3. Okaaaay! So.. It's quite distressing to see that in-law's and husband's are capable of treating their wives in that manner. A woman should feel welcomed in the home that she marries into. Rather than her mother-in-law constantly having a "tom & jerry" episode with her and the husband behaving negatively towards his wife. There SHOULD BE TRUST between the two. Now, after reading your situation.. I do think that AT LEAST.. even if your husband were to put his trust into you or NOT make you feel like an outsider then your marriage wouldn't be falling into pieces. It's completely and utterly disgusting and sad how women get treated after they marry. I'm not saying ALL but some. And the reason to why I'm commenting on the issue is because I'm sure there are several "readers" who will read this and I want the MEN to be alert and not to allow this to happen to their wives or future wives. Mothers are naturally close to their sons and the moment they have to share them that's an alarming barrier between you and your wife. The mothers will jump at any chance of retaining the "full attention" of their Son. Whether they do that consciously or unconsciously, no idea. But the fact is that it does happen. So be aware of that and don't allow yourselves to be brainwashed. And don't treat her like an outsider.

    So you are not divorced? Well then you need to talk to your husband about the matter and discuss the situation with him. If that doesn't work then involve someone whom he would "listen" to and take heed of the advice that is given to him. Right now rather than sitting down and sulking you need to work on the current situation. And that can be achieved by communication. Whether it be you who is communicating with him or whether you choose a trustworthy mediator who works on this with you. If he still seems to be reluctant on rectifying his behavior then think ahead of the next move. But I guess that comes later after you have tried communicating with him or through someone.

    The thing is that right now you must feel excessively upset and depressed so to overcome that I urge you to perform your Salah promptly, involve yourself in voluntary or paid work if you're not already doing something of that sort? The point is for you to keep busy and not sit alone sulking and drowning yourself into bad memories. The more you're going to replicate the problems the more you will remind yourself of the terror. So i would advise for you to keep yourself busy. Make do'a in this blessed month. Have some sort of physical activity alongside (swimming, tennis etc).. whatever that's in your best interest as it'll help you in this stressful time.

    Also be very careful of who's advice you take on board.. usually they say listen to everyone but still make your own decision. Right now as you're overwhelmed by a load of problems you won't be able to make precisely beneficial decisions in the cloudy atmosphere that's in your mind. So be careful of who you speak to and also be careful not to follow everyone and anyone's advice and try being able to bring yourself into a better state before making any firm decisions. You don't want to be making any big decisions on the spur of the moment and then regretting it later. And try not to be overly sad, and keep reminding yourself that Allah knows best and that everything happens for a reason.

  4. Salam,

    Don't concentrate too much on a meaningless dream. You should count your blessings to be out of that house and that your husband is gone. No man should be abusive to his wife in any ways!!
    Move on and pray Allah to help you find someone Pious who fears Allah too much to wrong you.

    Good luck sister

  5. Asalam alaikum warahmatullah wabarakatuhu
    SubhanaAllah, thats really sad sister 🙁
    May Allah grant u happiness now, in ur future and the Akhirah.
    You were so patient with your husband MashaAllah and he and his family chose to treat you like trash. Allah will grant you a good husband who will inshaAllah treat you with respect. Dont worry about this your ex husband, his punishment awaits him, Allah will deal with him and his family. He made a huge mistake for letting you go, he might have done it to please his mother but still, that is no excuse to treat one's wife like that Astaghfirillah :(. This might come to hunt him in his next marriage (Auzobillahi). Sis just move on, do your prayers, inshaAllah Allah will answer all your prayer, i want that family to see you happy inshaAllah, that will teach them a lesson.

    May Allah grant you a spouse that will love you and cherish you, may Allah give you a strong heart to forgive and forget your ex husband and his family's tortures so that you can move on and be happy. Ameen.

  6. Assalamu Alaikum sister,
    i am also suffering from the same problem that u r having sister,but the only difference is ur husband atleast respond to u in some sorts,but my husband even didnt respond to me.Neither he shows love nor he shows hate...he too left me bcoz of his family.He loved me dearly until i was with him and when he left for his work its a chance for his parents to gossip about me..What will i do?Only Allah subhanallah has remedies for our problems

  7. ws muezza,

    As far as i can interpret, he must be having feelings for you but since he doesn't do anything, he must be totally dependent in you or his parents or siblings to support him financially. naturally, he must not be having the spirit to argue with them in such circumstances.

    but dear one, you need to communicate, issues like this cannot be handled without communication. As you say, you have given him enough time and he doesn't return, y not ask him what has he decided for you?

    tell him, we have been through enough and that we are in a phase where we need to settle down things rather than wasting this precious time in our lives. However, if he is interested in sumone else, he may tell that frankly and that you are all ears to listen to him.

    i know that heartbreaking, but just ask him if whatever he plans to do is practicable. more importantly, i dont think he has got some real friends to guide him through, to make him see the real picture!

    i too understand, you myust have made efforts to make him understand but thts not just working. plus, do you know the girl he is involved in? if yes, do you think she is worthy enough. if she is no better for him, just tell him what's added in her thats missing in you. make him realize he must be turmoil-ed by emotions and that this will just ruin y our beautiful relationship.

    just stay calm muezza, i dont want you to lose hope, instead stay firm. some mornings may b sad, depressing and even ugly but there are days when u wake up illuminated. keep yourself busy and decide since you have got time my dear!

    if you can "

    try reciting this 1000 times daily - any part of the day

    ya kahir-al-aduo-ya wali o ya wali
    ya mazhar il ajaib ya murtaza ali

    may Allah be with you dear one!

  8. I just saw a dream .. where my ex husband was beating me.. taunting me.. and planning to kill me and my mother. My ex husband gave me a divorce recently. last time, I came to know that he was about to get married to someone I know. Then.. i asked everyone not to give me any update about the ex or his wife.. he was a drug abuser and his mother and other people abused me verbally for so long... then he kicked me out of his house... allah... may everyone has a blessed life and no one faces what i faced ...

  9. Asalam o alaikom sisters,

    I am married and m with my husband, a very poius and kind person Mashallah, we r both afflicted and some times we do get controlled by other forces which brings us to the point to say anything to each other.
    But since I married him, I dream about him that he is missing, he left me , he is disappeared , or he married away .
    I don’t know why I dream like this , I do have the fear of losing him as we talk about second marriage of him most of the time. But I don’t know what these dreams would be indicating me.
    If anyone knows any good interpretation please share it . Thanks xx

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