Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Confused about marriage rules.

islam nikah

assalamualaykum brother,
I am born in a Muslim family (Alhamdulillah). But I've been practicing Islam for last few months. As I am in a relationship with a Muslim girl, we both love each other and also agreed to be married. But our social situations makes it nearly impossible right this moment. And I can not send proposal to her father or family. As far as I know there has to be proposal, announcement, mohorana and witnesses to valid a marriage regarding Islamic law. Now my question is, can her elder brother be the guardian? And with help of him without letting her father know, will this marriage be valid or not?


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4 Responses »

  1. I have been in a relation for more than year. Me & my partner been very close several times (but had no sexual intercourse). Every time it happens I feel guilty & promise won't do it again but it still ends up happening. We are away for months from each other & I was happy nothing happened. But when he came back from abroad we became close again (again no sexual intercourse or oral sex ). I feel more guilty, disgusted than ever & this time it feels worse & I promise my self I wont. And I really hope to keep it. We are to be engaged soon & promise myself to keep it clean until we are married. I feel so guilty. Help & guide me. How do I ask for forgiveness from Allah. Will he forgive me

    • GH, Allah will forgive you if you make sincere tawbah. And the answer to your problem is easy: do not see the woman again until marriage. Talk to her on the phone, but do not meet in person. To avoid a sin, cut off the avenues that lead to the sin.

      Wael Editor

  2. Salam,

    Her father is her Wali, how will you have an announcement of marriage without letting the father know? What are you going to say to her father when you show up as a married couple and claim his daughter is your wife? I think you need to tell the father of your intentions.

  3. No brother, it's not valid.

    Brother it's good to be in love but if you wanna get married you have to be a man.

    A mature adult. And that means that you are able to provide for her and have a job. And also are able to face the truth and be courageous. That means you have to approach her parents. Just organize a meeting and chat with them.

    You don't want to start off your adult life by sneaking around her parents just so that you can have intimate relationship with this girl. Be a man, meet her dad and if you truly can't meet her parents you have to cut off your relationship and stop wasting both your time.

    I know things seems impossible, but make dua, and pray that Allah make it easy for you.

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