Islamic marriage advice and family advice

Is it denial? Should I marry her or not?

Photos in a shoebox

Asalamu Alaikum Rahmatullah

I'm getting married soon inshallah in 2 months .....I'm very loyal , loving , patient and caring . I am in love with my intendant she's everything I want for this life she isn't perfect but I believe I can better her and vice versa.

I love her and her family and I care about her image .I found out that she was sending images to another man and receiving them as well I am hurt still at this moment I don't know whether to end the marriage or keep going and look past her shortcoming because if I end it her family will ask why and then I'll have to say the reason I want to marry her but that was a crucial blow still inshallah please help me

I love her and I never thought of hurting her the way she did and that's what hurts me because walahi I still refuse to think it was her but it was and now I'm stuck in limbo whether to make this decision or leave her off?

will this require istikara? Please let me know


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2 Responses »

  1. My response is based on the assumption that your fiancée sent pictures to other men while being engaged to you. But if it's something she did in her past, before meeting you, then my response might be different. here goes:

    "I believe I can better her"

    And what if you can't better her? Then you have married a woman that has cheated on you before you even married her - and it makes you a damn fool for marrying her in the first place.

    When you marry a person, you need to like and be okay with the person they are when you meet them. You can't choose to be with someone for the person you think you can turn them into, because none of us have the power or right to change other people.

    If you ask me, I think this woman isn't the right person for you to marry. I don't know what screams "run away" more than a person cheats on you before you marry them...

  2. Assalamu aleykum.

    Brother I am sorry to read your story. The only solution is to do salat Istikhara and ask Allah what is the best for you. This is the du'a you should recite after performing the two rak'at: "O Allah! I seek goodness from Your Knowledge and with Your Power (and Might) I seek strength, and I ask from You Your Great Blessings, because You have the Power and I do not have the power. You Know everything and I do not know, and You have knowledge of the unseen. Oh Allah! If in Your Knowledge this action ------------------------------------------------ (which I intend to do) is better for my religion and faith, for my life and end [death], for here [in this world] and the hereafter then make it destined for me and make it easy for me and then add blessings [baraka'] in it, for me. O Allah! In Your Knowledge if this action is bad for me, bad for my religion and faith, for my life and end [death], for here [in this world] and the hereafter then turn it away from me and turn me away from it and whatever is better for me, ordain [destine] that for me and then make me satisfied with it."

    Hope you will find a solution soon in sha Allah. Good luck.

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