Islamic marriage advice and family advice

My wife neglects and verbally abuses me

Angry wife


I have been married to my wife for just over five years now and we have a one-year-old daughter Alhamdulillah.

Over the years, I have noticed my wife has started not taking me seriously enough and speaks back to me often even though I am not raising my voice. Recently, she said F*** *ff to me only because I tried ask her some question about a petty thing. I have never raised my hand on her and I have been loyal to her.

We both love each other and I know she loves me when I sometimes confront her when it gets too much for me at times. I can see it in her. But how much love she has for me is a question which I'm now asking myself based on her treatment of me.

I don't want to divorce her because of this because we have a child and because I love her. But every time our arguments gets heated, she threatens me with a divorce by indirectly mentioning something else which we both know can only mean "divorce."

When I confront her after she calms down and I ask her why she threatens me, she mentions that I shouldn't take it seriously as women can be emotional and say things and that women have hormones that can play up. I accept this reason and we give each other a hug.

She also mentions that I'm not doing much for my daughter in terms of looking after her during the night, but I told her that the baby will cry for the mother's breast milk which is something I obviously cannot give. Otherwise, I do help her with looking after our baby, doing things ranging from changing nappies every day to sometimes feeding during the day when I'm not working to changing her clothes.

Am I not doing enough? I financially provide for my daughter as well, but my wife also financially supports her even though she doesn't have to. I'm working and fully capable of supporting myself and family.

Also, my wife spends most of her time on the phone. I have confronted her about this several times but don't do it anymore as I know she won't listen.

I feel isolated and lonely a lot of the time, especially since my father's passing. I got into a marriage thinking that whoever I marry will be my life partner, will support me, I will support them, and won't feel lonely. Although

She has accepted that she can get angry easily and she can't control it and she's outspoken whereas I am reserved, calm, and patient

She does pray and does her best to pray five times a day similar to myself.

Please tell me if there is something I'm missing and not doing. Or does she clearly not love me anymore as she has said a few times when I asked her about this? She said she doesn't feel the same love as she felt from beginning.

I feel very hurt every time she ignores me or swears at me, but I now keep it inside of me with a lot of pain inside. There are now things I don't feel comfortable sharing with her like I did before.

Any advice will help Inshallah




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1 Responses »

  1. Maybe go to a couple therapy

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